Gina Carano to headline a female version of The Expendables

Chicks demand their own versions of everything now – voting, the WNBA, rights – and since we bros can’t have anything of our own anymore, girls are getting their own Expendables now too. They’ll probably have to take money away from guy movies to make it too because of Title IX. F*ckin Obama.

As “Haywire” star Gina Carano continues to establish herself as an action heroine with an upcoming turn in “The Fast and the Furious 6,” the former MMA fighter has become attached to topline an all-female riff on “The Expendables,” which is being set up by Adi Shankar’s banner 1984 Private Defense Contractors.
Dutch Southern, who wrote the 2010 Black List script “Hoof Harrington’s Greatest Hits,” was tapped to write the estrogen-powered action pic back in August, just as “The Expendables 2” was opening atop the box office.
“I don’t know how I’m supposed to make a movie that is supposed to be the female version of ‘The Expendables’ without Gina Carano in it. It would be like making Twix without caramel or Jamba Juice without jamba,” said Shankar, whose shingle recently co-produced Joe Carnahan’s “The Grey,” Pete Travis’ “Dredd 3D,” Andrew Dominik’s upcoming Brad Pitt-starrer “Killing Them Softly” and the viral Internet hit “The Punisher: Dirty Laundry,” starring Thomas Jane. In addition to a key role in “The Fast and the Furious 6,” Carano is also attached to star in John Stockwell’s “Taken”-esque action-thriller “In the Blood.” [Variety]

Ha, “In the Blood.” It’s like Taken but with periods. “What I do have is a particular set of irrational emotions…”

So, I suppose the question still remains – what do we call an all-female Expendables? The Chickspendables? The Expoondables? The Expendabewbs? The Sandwich Squad? And do they fight bad guys, or do they just get all hysterical and cry until the bad guys break down and give them what they want? One thing is for certain, it better star Michelle Rodriguez. No one is a more hardcore Latina than Michelle Rodriguez. And maybe Judi Dench as the gruff, foul-mouthed elder stateswoman. She and Gina could do an homage to that scene in Predator – what’s da matta, CIA got you pushing too many pencils? – but instead of arm wrestling, maybe they just make out for a bit. And it would be classy cause she’s British.

obligatory Gina gif.

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