X-Men First Class was better than it had any right to be, especially after the infamously rushed production schedule. A lot of people credit Matthew Vaughn for making it as good as it was, which makes it slightly worrisome that he dropped out of the sequel, leaving X-Men Days of Future Past to Bryan Singer, whose last few movies have been underwhelming. But so far Singer’s doing everything right, and by that I mean he tweeted a picture of naked Jennifer Lawrence getting her Mystique makeup applied. Well played, Singer, well played. You are my kind of auteur. BUT WAIT! Did I just say “Naked Jennifer Lawrence?” I did indeed say “Naked Jennifer Lawrence,” and “Naked Jennifer Lawrence” is exactly what I meant.

(*pulls out two prop pistols, fires, flags emerge from barrels reading “Search Engine Optimization” and “$$$$$”*)

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We already discussed Netflix’s April Fool’s Day gag, which was actually the exception to the rule that April Fool’s Day “jokes” are usually just plausible lies, which don’t really qualify as jokes. It’d be like if Louis CK just went onstage and said, “Hey, guess what you guys, I’m 42. PSYCH! I’m actually 45!” and walked offstage. Bryan Singer, on the other hand, went ahead and proved the rule, tweeting that Lady Gaga had joined the cast of X-Men Days of Future Past as Dazzler.

I can finally announce @ladygaga is joining #XMen #DaysofFuturePast as Dazzler. One of my all-time favorite characters. Can’t wait!

— Bryan Singer (@BryanSinger) April 1, 2013

Variety actually picked up the Tweet and ran it as a story. Which, yes, was kind of an amateur move, but keep in mind that Singer has been announcing his cast acquisitions on Twitter for months. Suffice to say, Variety quickly learned the Tweet was a joke and had to pull their story:

Lady Gaga’s casting in X-MEN: DAYS OF FUTURE PAST is an April Fool’s joke, says her agency. Good one, Bryan Singer.

— Marc Graser (@marcgraser) April 1, 2013

Again, if getting people to believe a plausible lie is your idea of a joke, then I’ve got some old resumes you should see, they’re a real pants splitter. Also, if you tell the world that you’ve cast Lady Gaga in your movie, and we find it believable enough to think that you’d actually do it, who’s that joke on, us or you?

No doubt inspired by memories of all those good times they had together before one of them turned evil dredged up by X-Men First Class, Magneto will be officiating Professor X’s wedding. It’s all part of a carefully orchestrated plan to keep nerds from ever having to engage with reality.

Sir Ian McKellen will officiate at the upcoming wedding of Sir Patrick Stewart and his fiancée, 35-year-old jazz singer Sunny Ozell. When the topic of X-Men: Days of Future Past came up during McKellen’s appearance on U.K. program The Jonathan Ross Show this weekend, the English actor announced, “I’m going to marry Patrick,” provoking some fits of laughter from the audience before he clarified, “How else do you put that? I’m going to officiate at his wedding.” [EW]

And somewhere, the guy who played Worf sits, morosely staring at his eternally silent Bat’leth phone.

Anyway, let this be a lesson to all the guys out there: if you’re 72-year-old actor and you don’t want your wedding to a woman half your age to sound scandalous, just get a sassy, beloved gay knight to officiate. Now everyone will cheer. You can’t deny that these two are adorable together. Not even Danny Boyle standing between them can change that. MY GOD, LOOK AT THE SIZE OF HIS HEAD!

Danny Boyle’s skull was the model for the Juggernaut helmet. True story.

Of course, as you may have seen, Patrick Stewart is no stranger to presiding over unions himself:

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Oh hell yes. Everyone’s favorite dwarf (sorry, Wee Man), Peter Dinklage has joined the cast of X-Men 4 Subheading B, Future Pasts of Passed Futures Predicting Future Gross. Or, as it’s known in the lamestream media, X-Men: Days of Futures Past, which trades director Matthew Vaughn for X-Men 1 & 2 director Bryan Singer. Singer made the Dinklage announcement himself on Twitter.

Officially like to welcome #PeterDinklage from #GameOfThrones to #XMEN #DaysofFuturePast Very very excited!

— Bryan Singer (@BryanSinger) February 14, 2013

Singer didn’t say what character Dinklage might play, and none of the usual news outlets seem to know either. I don’t know much about the comic books myself, but I think it’d be cool if Dinklage played a new type of mutant, who has the power to transform himself into a dwarf but not back again.

(Including the gif of Tyrion slapping the piss out of Joffrey, because obviously).

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Bryan Singer made two X-Men movies, then Brett Ratner made a third, but it sucked, so Matthew Vaughn made a prequel to the first two with a new cast, and it was pretty good again. Now Bryan Singer is back making the sequel to that prequel, which will star prequel stars James McAvoy, Michael F. Assbender, and Jennifer Lawrence, along with original stars Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellen (confirmed a few days ago). Now, the Hollywood Reporter says Hugh Jackman is in talks to come back to play Wolverine in X-Men: Let’s Just Forget That Whole Brett Ratner Thing.

Sources confirm that Hugh Jackman is in negotiations to reprise his Wolverine role in the movie, which is ostensibly a sequel to X-Men: First Class but will prominently feature actors from the first X-Men trilogy (the first two of which Singer directed).

Days of Future Past is a classic storyline that unfolded in two issues of Marvel Comics’ Uncanny X-Men in 1981, from writer Chris Claremont and artists John Byrne and Terry Austin. The story was partially set in an alternate future where surviving mutants have been penned in concentration camps, giant robots called Sentinels patrol America, and most of the X-Men have been hunted and killed. In the present day, the X-Men were forced to stop a key event from unfolding in order to keep that future from occurring. [THR]

I don’t know how the time travel storyline from Days of Future Past plays out in the comics (though I’m sure you nerds will tell me, won’t you – HELP, MY NECKBEARD IS BECOMING THICK AND DANDRUFFY!), but I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I could watch an entire movie of Magneto flying around the Earth killing geriatric Nazis.

“X-MEN! You must prevent a key event and save the future from becoming a dystopian hellhole! (*whispering*) Psst. And here’s an extra thou if you can go back in time and keep Adam Levine’s parents from meeting.”