When the first thing a trailer does is brag that it’s from the executive producer of The Grudge, Boogeyman, and Tekken, you know it’s going to be good.  Because they expect you to have seen and liked those movies.  This one’s called Wrong Side of Town, and it stars Ja Rule, Omarion (note: I have no idea who this person is), a bunch of fake wrestling guys, and porn star Stormy Daniels (just your standard, all-natural, girl-next-door type).  I think the most interesting thing I learned from watching it is that wrestler Batista’s real name is “Dave Bautista.” (they take out the ‘U’ because WWE fans can’t be trusted with extraneous vowels).

I don’t know why he doesn’t just go by his real name.  What better way to strike fear into the hearts of opponents than with a name like “Dave Batista?”  Aaaand noooow.  Coming to the staaage.  Daaaaave! Baaaaatiiiiiiiiiiiistaaaaaaa! LET THE BODIES HIT DAVE’S FLOOR, LET THE BODIES HIT DAVE’S FLOOR….

Despite a semi-serious sounding announcement on the red carpet of the SAG Awards, reps for Mickey Rourke are now confirming that he will NOT be wrestling at Wrestlemania.

Paula Woods wrote in an e-mail that the Oscar-nominated actor “will not be participating in Wrestlemania. He is focusing entirely on his acting career.”

And here’s part of the story that I somehow missed the first time around:

Rourke had said he was going to toss Jericho “around the ring like tossed salad.” [Yahoo]

Unless you consider the double entendre, that’s a pretty poorly constructed threat.  I’m gonna tear you down like a torn-down building! Then I’m gonna squash you like a squashed… squash!  I’m assuming he meant it the other way, in which case fake wrestling sounds like it’s gotten a lot sexier since I last watched.