Red Dawn: Because nothing says entertainment like disgruntled emo kids with guns!

That’s right, the awful and awfully unnecessary Red Dawn remake is out on DVD today, but it isn’t alone.  We’ve also got flicks with Jessica Biel, Rebecca Hall, Eva Longoria, Aubrey Plaza, and two films with Catherine Zeta-Jones.  We’ve even got some famous dudes like Bruce Willis and Gerard Butler, if that’s how your ship sails.  We’ve got killer fish and killer water, a chatty hitman and a midnight stallion.  There’s a marine, a quadriplegic, Satan’s angel, and even some cannibals!

The DVDs:
Red Dawn
Wreck-It Ralph
Playing For Keeps
Lay The Favorite
The Bay
A Dark Truth
The Intouchables
Someday This Pain Will Be Useful To You
California Solo
Interview With A Hitman
Gun Hill Road
Midnight Stallion
The Marine 3: Homefront
Satan’s Angel: Queen Of The Fire Tassels
Elfie Hopkins: Cannibal Hunter
House Hunting

Streaming: Check out your choices here.

Does the name ‘DJ Mom Jeans’ mean anything to you?  It will, but only if you continue reading.  Curious about the fire tassels?  That’s understandable.  Continue reading to sneak a peek at ‘em.  Of course you can always just click the link above and skip right to the streaming suggestions, but if you do you’ll never know which film sold more tickets to German audiences than any other movie in 2012, and how can you live without that information? Read the rest of this entry »

The drug cartel wars in Mexico have killed as many as 60,000 people in the last six years (!!) so you might expect Mexicans to be a little jaded when it comes to murder. But just how jaded? Well, a 10-year-old was shot in the head and killed during a Wreck-It Ralph screening last week, and after they carted him out, THEY KEPT PLAYING THE REST OF THE MOVIE.

According to an ongoing police investigation and local media reports, the shooting occurred Nov. 2 while young Hendrik Cuacuas, accompanied by his father and sister, were watching the animated Disney film Wreck-It-Ralph in a southern Mexico City theater.

The boy’s father, Enrique Cuacuas, told investigators and radio station Radio W that the child was sitting on his right side in a full theater when about a half-hour into the screening he heard something whiz past his ear, followed by the sound of a thud. He then turned to his right and saw his son convulsing and bleeding from the head. At that point, he realized his son had been shot. The boy was rushed to a hospital in critical condition but died two days later.

An autopsy report revealed that the child was shot from a distance of about four to six feet and it said the bullet entered the front of his head. However, adding to the general confusion, the coroner was quoted as saying that the shooter was not necessarily standing in front of the victim. [Or maybe it was the chupacabra. What am I, a doctor?]

Even stranger, the boy’s father and others in the theater said they heard no gunshots. Without offering proof, Cuacuas told Radio W that he learned there had been similar incidents in the past in the same theater. [THR]

Sad yet? Oh, it gets worse.

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Not that we’re counting.

Opening Everywhere: Wreck-It Ralph, Flight, The Man with the Iron Fists

FilmDrunk Suggests: Sorry, I don’t mean by the title and banner image that there aren’t any good movies this weekend. In fact, I’m super stoked about Wreck-It Ralph and The Man with the Iron Fists. And while people are saying great things about Flight (except Vince, who hated it), I can’t see it because I already hate flying enough as it is, and the last thing I need is the thought that I should give my pilot a breathalyzer when I fly from Orlando to Seattle. Mainly, go see the RZA’s directorial debut or the adorable movie about video game characters.

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Wreck-It Ralph tells the story of a video game villain who finally grows tired of being the bad guy and wants to be popular. Even more, it tells the story of how brilliant Disney is to know that a generation of now-adults, who grew up playing 8- and 16-bit Nintendo games, would rush to theaters to pay $15 to celebrate classic characters from games like Q-Bert, Super Mario Brothers and Street Fighter, because we so eagerly pine for the good old days. Damn it, being an adult sucks.

Ralph hits theaters on November 2, so we can expect to see the promotional campaign ramped up over the next three weeks, and traffic on sites like VirtualNES shoot through the clouds that Mario can somehow walk on. This week, Disney released a new international trailer for Wreck-It Ralph, and just go ahead and take my damn money now, Mickey.

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Oh look, there's a giant lumberjack about to pop your mom's cherry. This must be a period piece.

Watching this Wreck-It Ralph trailer that just hit the web, it’s almost as if Disney was trying to figure out exactly how to make me care about an animated kids movie. An introduction from John C. Reilly and a Talking Heads song? Naaaaaailed it. This looks really cute, actually, and they didn’t even have to use animals in clown wigs dancing to hip hop. Imagine that.

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