Man, between zombies, predator, and Alicia Silverstone, Jane Austen is a giant whore.  The latest people to have their way with her work are Odd Lot Entertainment, who are planning a “contemporary Latina version” of Sense and Sensibility, called (*RECORD SCRATCH*) From Prada to Nada.

From Prada to Nada follows two spoiled sisters when they are left penniless after the sudden death of their father. Forced to move in with their estranged aunt in East Los Angeles, this is a fish-out-of-water story where the girls ultimately find romance, as well as a love for their culture. [comingsoon]

It stars Adriana Barraza, Camilla Belle, and naturally, Fez from That 70s Show.  The original Sense and Sensibility, as you’ll remember from 10th grade English Wikipedia, follows two sisters who find love and happiness after their father’s estate passes to their half brother, leaving them in “reduced circumstances.”  (*sips chamomile*) Snoooze.  What they really need to do is guy this story up a bit.  Like say, two lesbian sisters’ mission to solve their father’s murder at the hands of a drug ring, forces them to team up with their estranged half-brother, a former CIA assassin with a terrible secret.  Played by Danny Trejo.  (*pumps shotgun*)  “Deeju meess me, puto?”

^{Oh sheet, ése, they’re bout to throw chingasos. Ten bucks on el gato sério.}

That 70′s Show’s Wilmer Valderrama stars in this brand new red-band trailer for Crash 2: Eclectic Pukaloo Days of Wrath, set in the hot simmering intense racial boiling pot gangland cauldron fart that is Los Angeles.

The plot: Some Mexicans shoot an Asian chick while stealing a black guy’s shiny car! I wonder if the whiteys will say racist things and the Jews will act neurotic and the Koreans will open grocery stores that take money out of the black community! OMG, the racial problems so complex!  Can’t we all just get along? 

Coming soon to a theater new you, probably owned by a greasy dego wop who grabs his balls a lot.
Read the rest of this entry »