Man, today’s movie news is boring.  My favorite thing I’ve seen today is this guy named “Fagley Dork.” Anyway, here’s Inside the Actor’s Studio’s James Lipton onstage with Charlie Sheen at his Violent Torpedoes of T-Shirt Slogans tour last night in New York.  Charlie brought James Lipton up so that James could ask Charlie his favorite curse word, and James Lipton was like, “F-ck it, I’ll come onstage for three seconds. I ain’t doin nothin.” Charlie’s answer, which he probably had at least a day to come up with was:

“It’s either ‘f*ck’… or ‘Denise!’”

Hahahahahahaha get it?  It’s funny because that’s the mother of his children.  Oh, Charlie, you rogue. My question is this: is there any situation you could put James Lipton in where his presence would be at all surprising?  I swear that guy could be onstage with Gaddafi helping a Ukrainian nurse roast a goat and no one would bat an eye.  As for Charlie Sheen, everyone agrees that his show is boring as hell.  My favorite account of one of his shows was of a heckler shouting, “THIS IS THE WORST THING I’VE EVER SEEN!” at the top of his lungs.  And then seconds later, “THIS IS WORSE THAN CHERNOBYL!”  That’s quality heckling right there. They should just combine this with the Spider-Man musical and let the crowd shoot paintballs at them.

[via GotchaMedia]

As we were discussing our new favorite song and all things Rebecca Black on last night’s Frotcast, I believe it was Laremy who said, “Hey, someone should make a mashup of Rebecca Black’s Friday and the Ice Cube movie Friday.”

Thing about internet mash-ups is that they’re kind of like porn: if you can think of it, it’s probably already been done.  So here it is, “Friday” meets Friday.  I’m actually impressed with how well this turned out.  FUN. FUN. FUN.

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Yes, apparently that was a real shotgun

Today at a Sundance screening of Hobo with a Shotgun, Rutger Hauer told me to shut up in front of an auditorium full of people.  I’ll have video of that up soon, my ultimate geek moment, but for now, let’s focus on Rutger Hauer being awesome.

While director Jason Eisener was introducing the film, star Rutger Hauer, veteran of Blade Runner and possibly the most impish 67-year-old alive, ran onstage holding what appeared to be a real shotgun.  I’ve got video of that below, but this was the exchange:

HAUER: “You wanna take a bet if it’s loaded or not?

[Someone in the audience shouts "That's a real shotgun!"]

HAUER:  “We.  Shoot. Movies.  We don’t shoot f*cking people.”

(*breathes into paper bag to avoid geek coma*)

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I consider Kiefer Sutherland one of the coolest guys in Hollywood, mainly because he once told a guy with a video camera “that would explain everything,” and tackled a Christmas tree.  Which is why it pains me to report that he’s in talks to join the cast of Growl, which might be a perfect storm of all the worst things in the world.

1. First of all, the director, a former extra on Brett Ratner’s X3, is named “Sxv’Leithan Essex.” That’s right, unpronounceable AND apostrophe filled.  What, no exclamation points?  That’s not very extreme, bro.  For the record, he says it’s pronounced “skuh-lee-than.”  Though I find “f*ck yourself” really rolls off the tongue.

2. The Plot:

“In Growl, a traveling underground fight club called ‘The Brawlers’ arrive at a derelict ghost town tucked away in the Colorado Rockies. They meet the town’s only residents, the Maxilla family, who want to buy on to the fight card.  But the Maxilla family’s true intentions for the Brawler crew is soon revealed in teeth and claws.”

And by the fact that their name means “jawbone.”  Oh God, please tell me the town is named “Flowerew.”

3. The teaser poster had Phil Baroni in it. (Oddly, this may be the best thing about it).

4. With a concept as good as underground werewolf MMA fighting, you can’t just make one movie.  Oh no no no, you have to arm bar the iron while it’s still hot, or else you won’t get the sick scars, bro.

“We have the trilogy outlined, a prequel graphic novel and a videogame that sets up the events and characters in Growl 2,” Essex explains.

In conclusion, set photos of buff guys with tattoos.  (*chugs Rockstar, drives off in slammed Acura, starts telling everyone about how I’m going to “build my brand”*)

Today is 4/20, meaning probably 40% of the people reading this are super high right now. With that in mind, I give you this video of what 1000 frames per second looks like, courtesy of David Coiffier and the I-Movix SprintCam.  All together now: Whooooaaaaaaaa.  Personally, I could’ve used more cheerleaders-jumping-up-and-down footage, but if the jello bouncing at the 2:00 mark doesn’t make you demand another b load, I don’t know what will.  In related news, Zack Snyder just came.  He plans to shoot the birth of his next child with this camera.

[engadget via yesbutnobutyes]