Yesterday Kevin Smith took to his Twitter to give his fans and near million followers just what what they want: a graphic, disgusting mental picture of his tubby ass having sex with his wife. He tweefed (I’m trying to get “tweef” recognized as the verb form):
Ten years in and we bone like we’re cheating on each other WITH each other. A decade-plus and her clit/brown/taint-area still pOwns my dick.
To which he later added:
On a roll this week: we’ve f-cked twice a day every day since Sunday. With little fanfare I’m trying to make it a solid four weeks straight. [via Videogum]
But time out, what does “clit/brown/taint area” mean? The slashes seem to indicate that it’s all one place. So I ask: did Kevin Smith’s wife’s vag, taint, and butthole areas all merge into one mega orifice, the way San Diego, Santa Barbara, and L.A. became San Angeles in Demolition Man? Does Kevin Smith’s wife have a gaping hybrid hole? And if so, is that the secret to a happy marriage? I guess I just don’t understand this romantic stuff.
[and yes, that's Kevin Smith's wife in Playboy. Uncensored version here.]
What can I say, folks, I consider it a good day any time I get to use “vag” in the headline. The occasion is a story about The Reader, in which Kate Winslet had a nude scene like she always does. And as she told Allure, she had grow out her beef whiskers in order for her chatch to look more period-appropriate. …
Winslet tells Allure in the June issue that when filming “The Reader,” she had to grow in the hair “down there,” so to speak. She tells Allure, “because of years of waxing, as all of us girls know, it doesn’t come back quite the way it used to. They even made me a merkin because they were so concerned that I might not be able to grow enough.” [MSNBC]
Wigs or no wigs, It’s a good thing they got it right. I can totally picture myself standing up in the theater yelling, “EXCUSE ME, THIS DYSLEXIC NAZI’S PUSSY ISN’T HAIRY ENOUGH!” But I do that at most movies.
