We only have time for one take … and THIS is that take!

There was a time, about eighteen months ago, when you couldn’t swing a cat without running into someone name-checking Malcolm Gladwell’s “Tipping Point” theory (believe me, I tried, the cat was not pleased). People loved that Gladwell riff, they loved it so much they actually sort of lurved it. Why? Well, it was an easy way for folks to discuss change, and why we rarely saw it coming. Which is why I’d posit that the current “normal” of Hollywood, releasing fantastically awful reboots and hyping terrifically terrible retreads, is all about to change. Red Dawn is that “tipping point,” heralding a bright new era of innovation, even as 2012′s version of Red Dawn is over there in the darkened corner, finger blasting various farm animals.

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I haven't seen Thor or Captain America yet either. I'm super qualified to be writing this weekly guide.

That’s right folks, I’m one of the few sad assh*les who haven’t seen The Avengers yet.  Why?  Because I haven’t seen Thor or Captain America, and I hear they kind of play into things, plot-wise. So why haven’t I seen those?  Because my wife wants to see them too, but she never wants to see them, if you know what I mean.  On the plus side, we just watched What To Expect When You’re Expecting, so at least I can stop worrying about that film getting ruined for me.  Enough about me though, on to this week’s DVDs.  The big news is obviously the release of The Avengers, but I feel it’s worth noting that there’s also a big, 50th Anniversary edition box set of all 22 canonical James Bond films (sorry Never Say Never Again).  The blu-ray edition is currently the only way to get nine of the flicks on blu-ray, screwing over the people who own the other 13 007 flicks on blu and don’t want to buy them all over again, which is to say nothing of Skyfall, which will surely be included in an all-new box set in a few years when the 24th Bond film is released, but I digress. As for other, actually new DVDs, this week we’ve got Batman in addition to the Avengers, there’s a few damsels in distress, a couple of Klowns, James Franco, Samuel L. Jackson -in another movie besides The Avengers, Jessica Biel, John Malkovich, both Hilary and Haylie Duff, and John Goodman.  We’ve got a badass president, and not one but two Dove Foundation approved flicks with talking dogs -oh, and one of them is Vampire Dog!

The DVDs:
The Avengers
Batman: The Dark Knight Returns, Part 1
Damsels In Distress
Klown (Also available for streaming)
Vampire Dog
The Letter
The Samaritan
The Tall Man
Soldiers Of Fortune
Drunkboat
She Wants Me
388 Arletta Avenue
Deer Crossing
The Holy Roller
Golden Winter
FDR: American Badass

Admit it, you’re kind of curious about Drunkboat. Well, you know the drill.  Continue reading on the next page. Of course, you can always skip right to the Netflix page by clicking here, but if you do you’ll never find out which American Pie star is headlining the non-vampire talking dog flick. Read the rest of this entry »

In case anyone is paying attention to potential Christmas gift wish lists, the plans for the release of Marvel’s The Avengers on DVD and Blu Ray were released today and comic book fans can go ahead and slap on a diaper for this one. Sure, you can just purchase the film on DVD or Blu Ray on September 25, and that will probably suit your basic needs. Or you can purchase the Marvel Phase One Blu Ray Box Set for $200 and be a pig in proverbial poop. The set includes…

Marvel’s The Avengers (Blu-ray 3D and Blu-ray)
Captain America: The First Avenger (Blu-ray 3D and Blu-ray)
Thor (Blu-ray 3D and Blu-ray)
Iron Man 2 (Blu-ray)
The Incredible Hulk (Blu-ray)
Iron Man (Blu-ray)
Bonus Disc – “The Phase One Archives” (Blu-ray)

Included in the “bonus” category is the short film Item 47, which is the story of two losers who find some alien weapons after the huge battle at the end of The Avengers and they go around robbing banks with them. I can’t hate on that idea because it’s incredibly realistic. If you found a nuclear hand cannon and didn’t have a pot to piss in, you’d be knocking off armored trucks on your way to rob banks. The short film is also airing at Comic Con on Friday, so you have that to look forward to.

As you can see above, you also get your very own Tesseract cube and case, which is awesome if you ignore the fact that you’ll never take it anywhere. Also, your guests will probably think you’re a psycho when you bust it out at home, especially if you’re wearing your Loki helmet. But screw pride at this point. This is about awesome things that we don’t really need but absolutely must have.

Like these posters that also come with the box set but would never see the light of day in my home. I don’t care if I’m not planning to hang them up, I WANT THEM fancy ass Blu Ray sleeves that I WANT.

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You might not think The Avengers earning more than $200 million this weekend warrants a picture of a corgi dressed like Thor occupying an entire post, but come on, have you read FilmDrunk before? You know I’m posting this. I hear Thorgi’s brother Lorki can be a real dick, but I’d pet the hell out of him anyway. SPOILER ALERT: Lorki is actually half Chow.

Joss Whedon’s dogs are cute, but holy hell are they yappy.

[via here and here]

Thor 2 doesn’t have a script or a director, but it does have a release date, because that’s just how Marvel rolls, bro. They grip it and rip it, they live life with a lot of flair. July 26th, 2013 is when it’s set to go down, with Chris Hemsworth back to star but Kenneth Branagh out as director.

A sequel had already been a high priority at Marvel, with Don Payne, one of the scribes on the first film, already taking a stab at the story.
Disney will also unspool “Iron Man 3″ on May 3, 2013, setting up a release sked similar to this year’s: “Thor” [which] bowed in May, to be followed by “Captain America: The First Avenger” in July. [Variety]

Kenneth Branagh won’t be returning as helmer. Branagh, who directed the first film and watched it gross $437 million worldwide with a few territories still playing out, will likely be involved in some producing capacity. His exit was “mutual and amicable,” I’m told. [Deadline]

Iron Man 3 has Shane Black directing, which should be exciting in theory, but f*ck, I’m just a little superhero weary. I never thought I’d get tired of handsome young men prancing about masks and tights for my amusement, but here we are. I may be in the minority in that I liked Thor. It wasn’t a great movie, but it was a cute movie. The acting was great, the Viking-out-of-water comedy was surprisingly enjoyable, and the brother drama was different, at least (the Warriors Three were completely pointless, but there you go). I credit most of that to Kenneth Branagh.  Contrary to the conventional wisdom, someone who knows story is always better than the glorified graphic designers they usually hire. So it’ll be interesting to see whether Marvel decides to go the Joe Johnston/Brett Ratner route, or if they hire someone… good.