THOMAS IAN NICHOLAS

American Pie has already spawned two theatrical sequels, four direct-to-DVD sequels, and countless uncredited attempts to capitalize on its success. Meaning that there’s a huge built-in audience for the American Pie brand. And if you agreed with that idiotic statement, congratulations, you could be a Universal exec.

The studio is poised to bring on “Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle” writers Jon Hurwitz and Hayden Schlossberg to script a new take on the franchise, which is being described in the development community as “American Pie 4.” [Hence a sequel to the last theatrical sequel rather than a complete reboot] The movie would come on the heels of the third theatrical movie in the franchise, “American Wedding,” which came out in 2003, and a slew of lucrative DVD titles that followed. At least some of the original cast is interested in coming back for the new picture, though sources emphasized that development is early and there are no actor deals in place. [LA Times]

The only way I’d be interested in this is if Chris Klein plays his “This guy walks through the raindrops” character from Street Fighter. But of course the original cast is interested. Tara Reid and Natasha Lyonne need coke money, and Thomas Ian Nicholas will probably want to build a Scientology center or something if his music career doesn’t pan out. And Eugene Levy (see the top row of the below graph), he’s just happy to help out. Sh-t, he’ll sing at your Bat Mitzvah if you ask nice.