On June 10th, the 11th annual Golden Trailer Awards will take place in Los Angeles, celebrating and rewarding the best trailers, television spots and posters in the film industry. Sounds cute right? And don’t get me wrong, I totally respect the effort that it must take to craft a good trailer, and yet at the same time I’m fully aware that MOVIE TRAILERS ARE DESIGNED TO TRICK YOU INTO WATCHING THE PIECE OF SH-T. It’s like having an awards ceremony for whoever sold their used car the best. “Hey kid, you like this 1990 Nissan Sentra? Well yeah, I know it looks like a c-ckblock on wheels, but I can promise you that you’re gonna’ love this car. Um nooo, that’s not a chunk of sh-t on the backseat, that’s a…um…that’s an emergency brake.”
From the Golden Trailer Awards official site:
Movie trailers play an increasingly important role in entertaining us and helping us determine where to spend our leisure time. The best trailers are works of art in their own right, expertly blending elements of cinema and advertising.
Each year through an open competition judged by film industry notables, the Golden Trailer Awards recognize the creative people who make movie trailers, and the best examples of their unique art, in a gala award show.
Did anyone else read that last paragraph as a Def Poetry Jam? Anyway, surprisingly the “film industry notables” they mention are kind of impressive from the last few years, but it still just feels like a fabricated awards ceremony thought up during someone’s coke binge. It gets stranger once you actually take a look at ALL 61 CATEGORIES for the event. Not sure what I’m talking about? Well, let’s take a look at a few of last year’s winning fart boxes, shall we?
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