(Pictured: A typical Australian man)

After a legal battle with the Australian government that began a few years ago in the delightfully Australian-sounding investigation “Operation Wickenby“, Paul Hogan has been barred from leaving Australia until he pays US $34 million in taxes.  In a related story, Paul Hogan is still alive.  In another related story, Paul Hogan, whose IMDB page lists less than 10 movies, has made so much money that his tax bill alone is more than my entire family will make in our lifetimes.  Is the Australian tax rate 982%? Please tell me this is so.

Hogan, 70, was served with a departure prohibition order 10 days ago while in Australia to attend his 101-year-old mother’s funeral which has prevented him from leaving to return to Los Angeles where he lives with his wife and son.

Additional trivia: despite living in Los Angeles, Hogan’s last American movie was 2001′s Crocodile Dundee in Los Angeles, which I’m sure you’ve all seen.  He starred in an Australian movie last year called Charlie and Boots, which one IMDB reviewer described as “almost unbearably unfunny.”  He’s married to his Crocodile Dundee co-star Linda Kozlowski, who was insanely hot back in ’86.

“I can’t pay 10 percent of what they’re asking…. bugger ‘em!” the actor told Australian television’s “A Current Affair” late Tuesday. [presumably while riding a kangaroo and gesturing wildly with a boomerang. -Ed]
“If I was a tax evader, which I’m not, I must be the dumbest one in the world to keep coming back here instead of fleeing to a tax haven … I know they’re absolutely desperate to nail some high-profile character with money to justify the expense to the taxpayer.”
Hogan, who was once a painter on the Sydney Harbour Bridge, is under investigation as part of Australia’s biggest probe into offshore tax evasion, Operation Wickenby.
The operation is budgeted to cost at least $300 million. [Yahoo]

Paul Hogan went on to snort “Tax bill?  That’s not a tax bill.  THIS is a tax bill,” and pulled a wallaby out of his pants.  I think he’s losing it.

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A lot of mainstream films are shot in Australia (Where the Wild Things Are, Knowing, Wolverine, just to name a few from 2009) because of the favorable exchange rate.  But the Australian dollar, which was worth about 55 cents when I lived there in 2003, closed at 95 cents on Friday, and some say could hit $1.10 by next year. And all because of a secret coalition of Jew bankers.  WB had planned to shoot The Green Lantern in Sydney, but now they’re pulling out after the dollar dropped 30% just in the six months since the production was planned.

The NSW government announced in April it had secured the “Green Lantern” shoot at Fox Studios and production was to have started in November. Martin Campbell (“Casino Royale”) is set to direct Ryan Reynolds (“The Proposal”) in the big screen comic book adaptation, which is set for a summer 2011 release.  Industry sources here suggest “Green Lantern” will move to Mexico or Canada. [THR]

So what does this mean for you the moviegoer?  Nothing, really.  I just thought you guys should know.  I didn’t want you to hear it from someone else.  Reached for comment, Paul Hogan pointed to Mexico on a map and said, “That’s not a movie studio, THAT’s a movie studio,” pointing at Australia.  When I pointed out that both were just places on a map and not movie studios at all, he just cut off a slice of the salami he was holding and put it in his mouth and started chewing, staring right at me.  It was as if he hadn’t heard me at all.