We hadn’t heard anything about the Terminator franchise in a while, but if you think people forgot about it, you’re wrong (IDIOT), because today Deadline reports that Megan Ellison has enlisted her brother David to help produce a new one. If you don’t know who Megan Ellison is, you should, because she’s basically my hero. Movies that the 26-year-old daughter of Oracle billionaire Larry Ellison has thus far helped finance include: Zero Dark Thirty, The Master, Killing Them Softly, Lawless, Spring Breakers, True Grit, and upcoming projects from Spike Jonze and David O. Russell. Basically, if you hear of a movie aimed at adult film-lovers and not at dumb children in the last few years, there’s a 50/50 chance Megan Ellison had something to do with it. Her older brother David is also in the movie business, leaning more toward blockbusters, working on films such as Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol, Jack Reacher, Star Trek Into The Darkness, and G.I. Joe: Retaliation, and now Deadline reports that they’ll be teaming up for a new Terminator movie. Which sounds like a pretty logical plan to me, but then what do I know, I’m just a guy balls deep in a dead badger.

Nearly 18 months after Megan Ellison pledged over $20 million for the rights to finish The Terminator‘s storyline with a new series of films, she has finally closed the complicated rights deal with Pacificorp. Other than the fact no progress has been made all this time on a script, the surprise here is Ellison has enlisted her brother, David Ellison, to be her financial and creative partner.

New copyright laws allow for North American rights to The Terminator to revert back to creator James Cameron in 2019 (that happens after 35 years, and The Terminator was 1984). While that law hasn’t been tested in the courts, no major film company would want to move forward on a project with a potentially catastrophic rights crisis looming. So the original pricey deal — made with the expectations there would be three films — was scaled down because the reality is they might only get to make two installments.

The project has been moving in fits and starts, and most likely that has been due to the slow pace of the rights deal. At one point, Arnold Schwarzenegger had been attached, and so was Fast & Furious helmer Justin Lin. Because Ellison expected to put the first of two pictures in production in late 2012, Lin dropped out.

I’m not sure the Terminator franchise still has stories that are screaming to be told, but it’s a positive development to hear that Megan Ellison is involved and Justin Lin isn’t. Lin previously directed three Fast/Furious movies, which, even if you like them, are about as deep as pro wrestling, and Terminator is a franchise that requires a director with a bit of a brain. And if they are going to make another Terminator movie, I’d just as soon it not suck big farts. But hey, that’s just me, a guy who f*cks dead animals.

No one else could look this tough while eating ice cream

Whether it’s Eric Stoltz playing Marty McFly or Han Solo telling Princess Leia “I love you too,” it’s always weird to hear how iconic movies might have been different if things hadn’t turned out exactly the way they did. Add to the list Arnold Schwarzenegger’s iconic “I’ll be back” line in Terminator, which Arnold initially fought James Cameron over, according to his memoir.

In his memoirs published Monday, the former California governor says he thought the phrase sounded too “feminine,” insisting that “I will be back” was more rugged and suited to his robot killer character.
“Our biggest disagreement was about ‘I’ll be back’,” Schwarzenegger said. “I was arguing for ‘I will be back’. I felt that the line would sound more machine-like and menacing without the contraction.
“It’s feminine when you say the I’ll,” I complained, repeating it for Jim so he could hear the problem. ‘I’ll I’ll I’ll. It doesn’t feel rugged to me.’ He looked at me like I’d lost my mind.
“‘Let’s stick with I’ll,’ he said. But I wasn’t ready to let it go, and we went back and forth. Finally Jim yelled, ‘Look, just trust me okay?’ I don’t tell you how to act, and you don’t tell me how to write.’
“And we shot it as written in the script. The truth was that, even after all these years of speaking English, I still didn’t understand contractions,” said the Austrian-born actor. [Yahoo]

I actually think he had a point about “I will” sounding more machine-like, but part of the charm of the Terminator was a mechanical killing machine being programmed to converse in polite vernacular. And three syllables is just easier to remember than four.

Meanwhile, “I don’t tell you how to act…”? Isn’t that, like, ninety percent your job as a director, telling actors how to act? Seems like a flawed analogy. “Look, bro, I don’t tell you how to be a general, what makes you think you can start giving me orders?”

Army Dog says: "Boy, Linda looks ruff!"

As with any Internet meme or YouTube trend, things are bound to get old after one too many people gets in on the joke. In the case of recent celebrity invitations to the Marine Corps Ball on October 29, well, it started off cute and fun, and now it’s pretty weird thanks to 54-year old Terminator actress Linda Hamilton, who is apparently trying to scoop up Betty White’s sloppy seconds.

Last week, Marine Sgt. Ray Lewis made a YouTube video asking lovable geriactress Betty White to be his date to the ball. This was, of course, in response to Sgt. Scott Moore asking Mila Kunis, followed by Cpl. Kelsey De Santis asking Justin Timberlake. While Kunis and Timberlake have accepted (if their schedules don’t conflict, which they probably will), White outright declined because of her busy TV schedule. And that’s where Hamilton steps in:

“Rumor has it that you like your actresses vintage… I know that I am no Betty White, but I would be really, really thrilled if you can’t find anyone else to go to the ball with you, I could go. I’m only half as mature as she is, wink wink, but I am twice as funny, so I think that works out!”

I don’t know what the “wink wink” refers to, but I’m going to assume that if Lewis takes her he’s going to get laid. At least he’ll have a story to tell. Check out Hamilton’s plea for attention after the jump, and then join us as we run our memories through a car wash.

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Arnold in The Expendables 3

Megan Ellison, 25-year-old daughter of Oracle founder Larry Ellison, has quickly become known as some kind of indie movie savior, stepping in to finance films movie dorks (read: people like me) want to see, like Paul Thomas Anderson’s movie about Scientology, an untitled collaboration between Spike Jonze and Charlie Kaufman, a Bin Laden project from Hurt Locker director Kathryn Bigelow, and just yesterday, Martin McDonagh’s incredible sounding follow up to In Bruges, starring Rourke, Rockwell, Walken, and Farrell, just to name a few.  Now it seems she’s switching gears, acquiring the rights to a project that actually sounds pretty horrible, the next installment of Terminator, which has the Fast Five director attached to direct.

Megan Ellison has won an auction for the rights to make at least two more installments of The Terminator franchise, with Fast Five‘s Justin Lin attached to direct and Arnold Schwarzenegger attached to star. The deal came down to Ellison’s Annapurna Films and Lionsgate, which seemed to have had the project sewn up until she came forward with a dramatic bid. The auction at the time was for a guarantee for at least half of the $29.5 million paid by hedge fund Pacificor to pull the franchise out of bankruptcy. Unclear what the winning amount was, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it hit the $20 million mark. CAA brokered the deal. [Deadline]

There are two ways to look at this (not including the too-good-to-be-true way, that Ellison bought the franchise just so she could take it out behind the barn and shoot it). One being that Megan Ellison’s company needs a project that’s a guaranteed money maker to help pay for the other riskier, indie stuff (much the way I used prostitution to finance my rap career).  The other being that with a more independent financier like Ellison, this project might actually have a chance of being good (and of course, it’s possible that it’s a combination of the two).  But then, maybe we shouldn’t be so quick to jump to conclusions about someone whose name we only first heard a few months ago.  Politics, movie financing, and prostitution are the only industries where things are so bad that it’s normal to say, “Oh God, please hire someone who’s never done this before!”

Look, I like Terminator 2 as much as the next guy, but I’m not sure that means I want to see a flabby, 63-year-old robot in a movie from the guy who directed Fast Five and Annapolis (is it just me or is it bizarre that James Franco was in that?  no joke, I could’ve sworn it was C-Tates). Nonetheless, a new Terminator movie starring Arnold Schwarzenegger ( which was first announced a few days ago) is just the kind of idea that will steamroll the hundreds of entirely warranted reservations, solely on the basis that it sounds like it should be a big deal.  That’s just how spectacle works.  The latest news on the project, by way of LatinoReview, is that it will be called “Terminator 2012″, and it could reunite the “entire original cast”.

Or should I say “Terminator 2012” which is the title the pitch is going under right now. It involves time travel back to the present day, and – the exciting and mind-bending part of it all – is that it has the “entire original cast” attached to it, not just Arnie. I don’t know what “entire original cast” means, but it’s safe to assume that AT LEAST means Linda Hamilton is coming back to re-establish herself as the face of Sarah Connor. At best, we somehow get Michael Biehn as some sort of old Kyle Reese…

[UPDATE: Biehn says he hasn't heard anything about it, so take that for what you will.]

Oooh, will they bring back Moon Bloodgood, or Kristanna Loken??? Or maybe even Nick Stahl???? I don’t want to get my hopes up! I don’t know what “original” cast means exactly either, but I can only hope it’s code for… EDDIE F*CKING FURLONG!

Typical child actor

[Thanks for the Arnold pic, Pauly, you Mexican adonis you]