When a movie site reports something without naming a source or explaining how they got their information in any way, it’s usually bogus. But hey, it’s Friday, I’ll indulge them. Australian site moviehole reports that a remake of Teen Wolf is in “early development.” Isn’t the Twilight sequel already doing the Teen Wolf thing? Only instead of a metaphor for puberty, it’s a parable about the dangers of sex, and minorities?
Warner Bros (who snagged the rights to the film series about five or six years ago) are currently out to writers, looking for the craftiest reinterpretation of Rod Daniels’ 1985 hit. They’re not quite certain ”which way they’re going to go” - Me, I say go with ‘Son of Teen Wolf’! - but I’d say it’s pretty safe that whatever and whoever’s script they go with will again tell the story of Scott Howard and his pesky hair prob. Not expecting anything too original here. But then, it’s “Teen Wolf” - no need for too big or audacious an idea.
Call me crazy, but I don’t hate this idea. The protagonists of today’s teen movies all seem to be goth weirdos or jazz-handed pansies. A character like Teen Wolf is exactly what we’re missing. You think they had abstinence rings back in 1985? No. That was called being a loser. It’s about time we brought back the concept of a hero who takes being a party animal to it’s logical literal conclusion. And the way I see it, we’ve got two perfect models for the modern Teen Wolf.
Not to mention Chubby.
Deadspin recently made an amazing discovery: 310-pound Wisconsin-Milwaukee forward James “Big Lumber” Eayrs bears an uncanny resemblance to Mark “Chubby” Holton from Teen Wolf. And by “uncanny”, I mean they’re both fat and white and play basketball in black and gold #55 jerseys (the fat guy always has to wear #55). I imagine there are a lot of guys that look like Chubby in Wisconsin. Eayrs still has one year left of eligibility, and if movies have taught me anything, all the team needs now is a werewolf with Parkinson’s. That’s gonna be a fun recruiting trip.
