Before you ask, yes, of course it happened in Florida. A defense attorney from Titusville was arrested last week after he challenged his girlfriend to a naked sword duel. Which is strange, as I’ve always thought you needed at least two men for a naked sword duel. Burnsy’s going to be so bummed.

Terry Lee Locy, 36, faces counts of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon and domestic violence battery. The assault charge is a third-degree felony punishable by five years in prison.
According to an arrest affidavit, Locy and his live-in girlfriend were arguing early Wednesday morning about his “drinking in excess.” Locy then grabbed a mirror off a door and “raised it up as if he was attempting to strike” her, Agent Pamela Hibbs of the Brevard County Sheriff’s Office wrote in the affidavit.

“Mirror, mirror, on the wall, please convince this bitch to stop nagging me. Whatever, I’m not even drunk.”

That’s when the girlfriend grabbed the hook that the mirror had been hanging on and flung it toward Locy, who suffered a cut to his head.

Clever girl.

After showering, a nude Locy handed a sheathed sword to his girlfriend and said, “You’re going to need this,” the court document states.

That is the most gangster move of all time. Please tell me he slapped her with a glove.

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An Indianapolis woman was killed when she tried break up a swordfight between her grandson and brother in law.  Police say sword-related violence is on the rise after a 100-year decline.

Chris Rondeau, 39 and Adolf Stegbauer, 69, got into an argument at a home at about 1 a.m. that escalated when one of the men grabbed a sword, prompting the other man to also brandish a sword.

Say what you will, at least they both brought the correct weapon to the correct type of fight.

Franziska Stegbauer, 77, died as a result of stab wounds, Indianapolis police Sgt. Matt Mount said.  Investigators are trying to determine which man stabbed the woman, but Rondeau was already being held on an attempted murder charge because of wounds that Adolf Stegbauer suffered.

“We’re unsure yet who started this fight, how the swordplay got involved,” said Indianapolis police Sgt. Matt Mount. “We’re not sure who it was who stabbed the woman. We’ll have to do some testing on the swords and figure out who had which sword, whose blood is on which sword.” [IndyChannel]

No word on whether the late Ms. Stegbauer also “lived by the sword,” which would’ve made her death seem seem so much less senseless.