Come on, not cool, zombie bro.

The Super Bowl generally serves as the first launch pad of the New Year for Hollywood to show us what huge action films they have in store for us. And since the NFL’s biggest game is typically the year’s largest BROment, we can probably expect a lot of Iron Man 3 throughout the Super Bowl 47 broadcast this Sunday on CBS. However, we now also know that World War Z is getting in on the action, because Apple has released the film’s official Super Bowl teaser spot, and let me tell you…

It’s exactly the same as everything else we’ve seen, from the first trailer of this production mess to the first 8 minutes that someone described to us. Seriously, the Super Bowl spot doesn’t reveal anything else about the film at all, other than Brad Pitt and the family are in the car, a cop breaks their sideview mirror off, Pitt’s all like, “WTF, broseph?”, something explodes and then everybody freaks out because zombies are faster than Usain Bolt.

But at least they save the Constitution. Otherwise the Gates family will never find the zombie gold.

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Satan Willem Dafoe should have countered with, “I’ll suck your d*ck.” [via Viral Viral]

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Watch LL Cool J Performing Live In 1985 For A Group Of Kids |Smoking Section|

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Ranking Liz Lemon’s “30 Rock” Boyfriends |Buzzfeed|

The History of Wooing Men With Music |Clip Nation|

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Our Legally Required Jason London Poop Blog Post, Your Honor |Videogum|

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Bro’s Incredible Cover of R. Kelly’s ‘Ignition’ Is Hot and Fresh Out the Kitchen |Brobible|

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From the very beginning, the Michael Bay Tranformers saga has been more entertaining than he probably ever intended. What started with Megan Fox scrubbing some Ferraris developed into a disasterpiece of incredible-but-recycled special effects combined with terrible writing and over-the-top cornball acting. And despite Bay’s one-time threats to never make another action movie again, Shia LeBeouf offering to pay back every penny he earned to regain an ounce of credibility, Jason Statham supposedly considering taking over for him, and the fact that not one of the actors from any of the three films will return, there will be a fourth Transformers film and beyond, because Bay loves money.

And just how much does Bay love money? For starters, the whole point of Transformers 4 is for Hasbro to invent a brand new line of toys for Bay to base his robots on, because executives admitted that the last two films sold no toys. But that should hardly surprise anyone – even the rumor that there won’t even be an Optimus Prime – and neither should the latest news that Bay will choose an assistant for the 4th film from the contestants in a Doritos Super Bowl commercial. *makes explosion sound, chugs Mountain Dew*

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Just like always, the Super Bowl yesterday was the only event of the year when people actually watch, let alone discuss, commercials. Almost all of them try to be funny these days, but it might surprise you to learn that a committee of professional salespeople trying not to offend anyone may not be the most effective way to create comedy. The only thing sure to be must-see TV are the GoDaddy commercials, because not even a thousand monkeys on a thousand tabs of acid with their brains set on shuffle could come up with as strange a combination of “hot-chick” spokespeople as Danica Patrick and Jillian Michaels from The Biggest Loser. Tim and Eric could huff ether-soaked rags for a week straight and not achieve that level of pure randomness.

Anyway, plenty of movies got in on the commercial action, including The Dictator, Act of Valor, The Avengers, GI Joe 2, John Carter, and Battleship. You can see all their spots here, and not on other sites, which I’ve never read, but I hear are for dong punchers.

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Yahoo just released the Super Bowl TV spot for Ridley Scott’s Robin Hood, starring Russell Crowe, Mark Strong, and Cate Blanchett.  I have to admit, it looks kind of badass, which basically leaves me with nothing but cheap and not-even-that-accurate fat jokes.  In fact, I spent the last hour trying to create a Photoshop that involved Russell Crowe’s Robin Hood and the phrase “Let them eat cake!”, but it didn’t really turn out.  Looks like you’ve won this round, Crowe.  *pets cat, plots revenge*