(Sure, Party Dog goes to male strip clubs. It’s a great place to meet horny bitches.)

Channing Tatum was recently off promoting his latest movie, Mumbles the Wigger, when the interviewer asked him about that stripper video of his that’s been floating around.  Much as I love ripping on the guy, he was actually pretty cool about it.

“It’s absolutely true,” Tatum, now 29, laughs. “I did it for almost a year. I’ve lived a crazy life, for sure.
“It seemed like a fun thing to do at the time and I got out unscathed. It’s nothing I’m ashamed of and I’m not proud of it either. I wanted to talk about it in the beginning of my career but my publicist wouldn’t let me.”
Tatum says he has so much material that could be used as background, he plans to make a film about a male stripper.
“I’ve already got the director picked out. I’d like Nicolas Refn, who did the movie Bronson, to do it because he’s insane for it,” he says.
“It needs to be a crazy film and I think it’s also possible to do a cute, romantic movie.”  [SydneyMorningHerald]

In all seriousness, that sounds like a way better idea than anything he’s been in so far.  I like the semi-autobiographical angle, like Funny People with guys swinging their wieners around or whatever male strippers do. Imagine the drama when the aging veteran top-dog male stripper becomes threatened by the brash newcomer with all the slick moves.  “You’re not fit to wash my cock pouch!” I imagine him yelling.  But then maybe later they find out that they’re not so different after all.

This Channing Tatums stripper video (SFW, more or less) will inevitably be everywhere today, so I might as well post it.  Otherwise you’d probably type in “stamp collections” and Google would ask “Did you mean Channing Tatum shaking his weiner?”  But anyway, as uncovered by Us Weekly, Channing Tatum used to strip in a “Chippendales-style revue called Male Encounter” when he was 18.

The star — who performed under the alias “Chan Crawford” — approached the troupe’s owner London Steele at a now-defunct Florida nightclub about a job.
“He was shy at first, but he really knew how to work the stage,” Steele tells Us, adding that Tatum lip-synched in the act and earned $50 a night (plus tips) during his year-long stint.
“The women went crazy for him!” Steele added.  Unfortunately for them, the revue had a strict no-nudity policy.  Nevertheless, the actor — who wed his Step Up costar Jenna Dewan on July 11 — was so impressive he caught the eye of a female casting agent [yeah, female, sure] who put him in Ricky Martin’s “She Bangs” music video. [via Us]

I’m glad they got to this guy first, who says Channings approached him about a job, before Tatums had a chance to spin the story.  Like all models do, you know he’d make it sound like he was just hanging out at the beach or casually playing skee ball with friends when all of a sudden a mysterious stranger offered him money to take his clothes off.  They’re never honest enough to tell the real story, which is  “Well, I was hanging out in front of the mirror shaking my weiner, and I was thinking to myself, ‘Wow, I’m really good at shaking my weiner.’  And then I thought, ‘Hey, I wonder if I could shake my weiner for money.’”

[via WWTDD, Movieline]

In this new clip (video below) from director Darren Aronofsky’s The Wrestler (trailer here), Mickey Rourke picks up off-duty stripper Marisa Tomei using the ultimate pimp move: he whips out his own action figure.  Let’s face it, seduction doesn’t get much more persuasive than that.  Though I’ve heard cocaine also works.

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As you may have already seen, here’s that trailer for Powder Blue, in which Jessica Biel plays a stripper.  I’ve tried to attach some relevant screenshots, but the footage I’m working with isn’t that great – this one or this one’s probably the best – but I definitely screen capped a little kid on a gurney by accident at one point, and that should tell you a lot about what my life is like.

It’s hard to tell exactly what the film’s about, but the dialogue-free trailer screams DRAMA! and GRITTY REALISM! in a way that’s never the least bit realistic (see: Crash).  It co-stars Ray Liotta, Kris Kristofferson, and Forrest Whitaker, whom we see jumping off a building while dressed as Santa Claus. I can imagine why he’s depressed, he probably scared the shit out the kids with that eye.  I kid, I kid.  But seriously, is it weird that I imagine him turning back at the last moment and seeing Joaquin Phoenix with “BYE GOOD” written on his knuckles?

Pixar just released a brand new four-minute featurette from Wall E, narrated by writer/director Andrew Stanton – who previously did Finding Nemo, perhaps the finest film to watch stoned of all time.

“Wall E takes place 800 years into the future.  Mankind has left the planet hoping to return once it’s been cleaned up – a task left to robots.  The problem is, all the robots have finally broken down.  Except for one, Wall E – a robot with one tiny little glitch.  He’s developed a personality.”

Yeah, sometimes that happens with strippers too.  Usually I just stuff a dollar in their g-string and put my index finger up to my lips.  I’m like The Dog Whisperer when it comes to strippers.  "Ju see?  Thee pro-blame ees dat ju knee to cho dem who ees dee pack lee-dare."