The other day when I posted the Fergie song on the Great Gatsby soundtrack, I couldn’t shake the feeling that The Great Gatsby would be the non tongue-in-cheek Spring Breakers. This latest batch of posters only seemed to confirm my suspicions, thus I added captions. I think the Spring Breakers captions work so well that I didn’t even need to alter them. Memes, mash-ups, the internet, etc. It’s important work we’re doing here.
DTF Disney girls love pianists.
I enjoyed Spring Breakers, but I wouldn’t necessarily argue strenuously with someone who thought it was just stupid (whether it being stupid on purpose invalidates that criticism is a discussion for another time). I think Harmony Korine is more like the weird kid we pay to eat bugs (and I will happily pay him to eat bugs) than some super genius holding a mirror up to society’s ills or whatever. But this new poster for Spring Breakers (courtesy of those nerds at Indiewire) does a great job highlighting the incontrovertible: compelling imagery. To paraphrase Alien, LOOK. AT THAT SHIT. It could be easily be argued that Spring Breakers is more about production design than plot, character development, story, parody, or cultural critique, but it’d be hard to argue that that’s not some good-ass production design. And even if it’s a dumb movie, I’d say an artistic medium is much healthier and more relevant when it still gives itself the freedom to be silly.
I guess what I’m saying is, I’m looking forward to the deleted scene where they make fun of that fat guy with the huge penis until he gets a boner.
I’ve posted some of the videos here before (and they’re all below the cut if you want to check them out on your lunch break), but Spring Breakers director Harmony Korine used to be something of a regular on Dave Letterman’s show. Korine’s appearances were a perfect example of what made Letterman so relevant back then – that he’d interview cult personalities like Harmony Korine, and just revel in their weirdness. You rarely got Cameron Diaz holding forth on how she is or isn’t like her character in Knight and Day, for instance. Korine appeared three times between 1997-1998, but never since. Last night, James Franco was Letterman’s guest, and Franco pressed Letterman on why Korine had been banned from the show. Presumably just to get Dave to stop asking what Selena Gomez’s panties smell like.
Letterman played coy, pretending not to remember the three interviews, but then asked Franco to tell him what he had heard about the mysterious incident. Franco responded that Korine told him he was banned for pushing Meryl Streep backstage, but “he said he was a little out of it…Harmony is a very sane guy now, a great artist and great person to work with, but I think he had a period where he was going a little off the rails, so maybe he was on something that night.”
Now seems like as good a time as any to revisit the “unreleased projects” section of Harmony Korine’s Wikipedia page:
Fight Harm: Korine originally intended to follow up Gummo with a short-lived project known as Fight Harm, filmed by illusionist David Blaine. It comprised footage of Korine engaging random people in actual street fights. In these he followed rules of always provoking the fight and continuing until threat of death. Korine, who often said he would die for the cinema, hoped to make a cross between a Buster Keaton vehicle and a snuff film, but after only six fights, he was hospitalized and forced to abandon the project.
Jokes: Jokes is an unfinished three-part film written by Harmony Korine. The three chapters – Easter, Herpes and Slippers – were to be each directed by different directors, one of which was Gus Van Sant.
What Makes Pistachio Nuts? Prior to Mister Lonely Korine had written a story about a pig named Pistachio. The film was to take place during a race war in Florida and have a boy who would saddle the pig, put adhesive on its feet, climb up walls and throw molotov-cocktails. “It was going to be my masterpiece,” Korine comments. The script burnt in a fire and Korine spent $11,000 trying to recover it from his computer. He reportedly retrieved one sentence: “The speech is pointless; the finger is speechless.”
Point being, if Harmony Korine was entirely sane, he wouldn’t have a career.
I keep referring to Vanessa Hudgens and Selena Gomez in Spring Breakers as “Disney princesses,’ but what this video presupposes is, what Spring Breakers starred actual Disney princesses? “Darling it’s better down where it’s wetter” FTW. |CollegeHumor|
Morning Links
Spring Breakers’ Director Harmony Korine’s Contentious, Hilarious Reddit AMA |UPROXX|
Replace The Fun. Song With Score From ‘Requiem For A Dream, Southwest Ad Becomes Evil |Warming Glow|
Phil Mickelson Does Not Enjoy Your Dumbass Questions |With Leather|
There’s A New ‘Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’ Game On The Way. It Looks Weird. |Gamma Squad|
McDonald’s F*cking Awesome New Burger |Smoking Section|
Hello? This is Dog House. |CoolDogs|
KSK Mock Draft: Naming Peter King’s Website |Kissing Suzy Kolber|
Gucci Mane Fell Asleep During Sex Scene |The Superficial|
Watch this child eat a ghost pepper. |Videogum|
The Curse of the Hometown Premium: Why Ed Reed and Brian Urlacher are leaving their longtime homes |Grantland|
Dog photobombs every photo in Craigslist apartment posting |The Chive|
Paul Rudd Is the King of Dating NBC Thursday Night Sitcom Stars |Vulture|
22 Vintage Photos of Animals Acting Like People |Mental Floss|
Ridiculous Karate Knockout |Clip Nation|
If Obama Was On ‘Arrested Development’ |HuffPost Comedy|
The Rich Kids Of Instagram Present: Cars You Will Never Drive |Giant Life|
The 7 Most Distressing Hook-Ups Of TV’s Favorite Will They/Won’t They Couples |Pajiba|
Fun With Game of Thrones Vectors |Unreality|
8 Cutting-Edge Fashions That Are Clearly Just Practical Jokes |Brobible|
Low Winter Sun: Trailer |High Definite|
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Opening Everywhere: The Croods, Admission, Spring Breakers, Olympus Has Fallen
FilmDrunk Suggests: That video above. It’s a dog named Milo dressed as the characters from The Wizard of Oz. It’s certainly a lot better than watching Gerard Butler sweat C-Tates’ jock. But it’s also not better than watching Ashley Benson and those other girls do stuff in bikinis, so plan your weekend accordingly.
