As you may have gleaned from the previous post, the new Twilight Breaking Dawn trailer just hit, and for the next few days, it’s sure to be the subject of many mash-ups. Hell, Seltzer/Friedberg already made a whole movie about it. Much like my cousin Stevie on the jungle gym, Twilight is what we call “low-hanging fruit.”

As such, you expect the mash-ups to be lame and predictable. George C. Scott made to watch. Hitler complaining about the plot. Some idiotic LOL cat thing. But this… this is a god damn revelation. Why didn’t anyone think of using Slapshot before now? God that is an awesome movie. And I can say that with near complete certainty, because I’d never seen it until a few years ago. Most comedy gets dated incredibly fast — you try to introduce someone new to movies that were considered universally hilarious when they came out, say, There’s Something About Mary or (and I hate to say it) Blazing Saddles, and a lot of it doesn’t quiiiite translate if you weren’t there to see it in its time. But I saw Slapshot 30 years removed and it was still hilarious. And you know you can trust me, because I’m a handsome scientist. (*spills test tube on bare chest, winks, trips over coffee table*)

[Thanks to JoBlo for the video. Sorry for saying you sucked that one time.]

Slapshot, released in 1977 and starring Paul Newman, is one of the best, if not the best, sports films ever made.  And now, it’s being re-made.  Okay, Vince, let’s settle down here.  Let’s figure out who’s involved before we do anything rash…

Peter Steinfeld (“21″) is penning the script, with Dean Parisot on to direct.  When Steinfeld took the writing job and spoke about it last summer, Internet pundits were critical of the notion of updating a favorite sports film. Yet such nostalgic resistance certainly did not hurt The Longest Yard, remake, a global hit that grossed far more than the original.  Parisot last helmed a remake of another comedy “Fun With Dick and Jane.” [Variety]

21 was one of the most insanely mediocre piles of cinematic oatmeal I’ve ever seen. Fun with Dick and Jane was impressive only its unfunnyness.  Really, a movie as unfunny as Fun with Dick and Jane is an achievement.  Then again, maybe you’re right, Variety writer guy.  I mean, hardly a day goes by that I don’t hear someone say, “Hey, you know what was a great flick? That remake of The Longest Yard with Adam Sandler.” or “That Longest Yard remake is my favorite movie ever,” or “Call me crazy, but for my money, compared to that remake of The Longest Yard, Citizen Kane looks like child porn.”