Review: Killing Them Softly, a Cinematic Motörhead Song

Written by Vince Mancini / 11.29.12

Stimulus Whackage

Take it from this reviewer, there’s no finer date movie this season than Killing Them Softly. You and your special lady can hold each other close as Brad Pitt opens Italian guys’ skulls with a shotgun! Interlace fingers as you thrill to bloated Ray Liotta getting his teeth kicked in by a fat rapper! Heck, bring grandma and the kids! They’ll love James Gandolfini talking about cutting up hookers! And the best part is, it’s family entertainment that’s not just fun, it comes with an important message. Namely, “Everything sucks and people are assholes the end.”

If that sounds like a negative critique, it’s not, I loved this movie. Killing Them Softly is like that angry song you loved when you were 15, or that angry poem you wrote when you were 15. It’s a crime story-as-political-allegory that’s about as nuanced as a middle finger and as subtle as a pistol whipping, but what it lacks in complexity, it makes up for in panache, consistency, and consistently graphic skull trauma. The main point director Andrew Dominik is making, that politics is just as messy and amoral for foul-mouthed, shit-smelling murderers as it is for candidates wearing American flag pins, isn’t a particularly unique or insightful one, but then neither is “Eat the Rich.” Tight, fast, brutal, and gleefully immature, like my lovemaking, it’s sort of a cinematic Motörhead song, not especially smart, but there’s a certain poetry to getting punched in the face. Art in the same way that a brick through the window has a beauty that transcends the thrower’s justification.

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Brad Pitt owns people and stuff blows up

Written by Vince Mancini / 10.18.12

NOOOO! Not Scoot McNairy!

After Seven Psychopaths turned out to be more about fartsy navel fingering than actual ownage, Andrew Dominik’s Killing Them Softly seems like it might be Fall’s last hope for a shoot ‘em up (release date: November 30th). It stars Brad Pitt as a hitman and James Gandolfini and Ray Liotta as a couple bad guys, plus Gloansy McGloane from The Town, and really, you don’t hire Gloansy McGloane unless he’s going to die violently.  He’s like a fat Irish Michelle Rodriguez. Less spice, more grit. Anyway, the latest trailer is below, and it has murder and Johnny Cash. That’ll do, Pitt, that’ll do.

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WATCH: Brad Pitt kills them softly with guns and explosions

Written by Vince Mancini / 08.02.12

"I'm telling you, it does exist. Just a couple inches inside, then curl back towards yourself and feel for the fleshy thing."

After the jump, I’ve got the first trailer for Killing Them Softly, from Chopper/Assassination of Jesse James director Andrew Dominik, starring Brad Pitt, Ray Liotta, James Gandolfini, and Richard Jenkins. Oh, and Slaine, the fat Boston rapper who was in The Town. Anyway, everyone loved it at Cannes, so if you don’t like it, you probably aren’t doing enough cocaine just don’t have a European sensibility. It actually looks pretty great, but it’s fitting that James Gandolfini is in it, because I feel like we saw a very similar plot in a Sopranos episode.

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