Sam Worthington was the subject of a recent profile in Details magazine.  The reporter asked James Cameron about him, and he apparently thought they were shooting a reality TV show.

“He’s the opposite of narcissistic,” says James Cameron.  “He doesn’t play the Hollywood game, He’s not there to make friends.”

That’s right, girl, he’s there to poop on Flava Flav’s stairs and get the Bachelor to touch down on his landing strip. God I hate myself for knowing that.  Additional Note: capitalizing “He” as if Sam Worthington is the biblical creator was Details’ doing, not mine.  Clash of the Titans tie-in, perhaps?

“It’s hard to find an actor who works for women and for men,” Cameron says.

“I’m not a great fan of people who say they put a sheet up in the backyard when they were 7 and entertained all the neighbors.” Says Sam Worthington.  “When I was 7, I thought I was a f*cking fire truck.”

When he was 7?  Hell, I was 27 and still hosing the neighbor’s fence.  And not because it was on fire, I just wanted to prove I could write my name.  But the quote speaks to why Sam Worthington gets all the action movie parts even when he can barely do an American accent: he’s not nor has he ever been a fruity hair farmer like all of our Disney Channel sh-tbags.  I don’t know what the Fox News guys have been raving about lately, but it’s the Disney Channel and hair helmets that will be the death of America.  Mark my words.

I swear, you’d think every show on that channel was a Beatles musical with an all-twink cast.

In between rounds of patting themselves on the back, becoming the highest-grossing movie of all time, getting sucked off by critics, and driving nerds to suicide, James Cameron and the producers of Avatar apparently found time to whine that none of their actors got nominated for Academy Awards.

“People confuse what we have done with animation,” director James Cameron said at the recent Producers Guild Awards.  “It’s nothing like animation. The creator here is the actor, not the unseen hand of an animator.”

The Oscars snub is “a disappointment,” said producer Jon Landau, “but I blame ourselves for not educating people in the right way.” Landau explained that they needed to make clear that the system they used represents a new way to use “motion capture” photography, or as Landau puts it, “emotion capture.” [*facepaw*] “We made a commitment to our actors that what they would see up on the screen were their performances,” Landau said, “not somebody else’s interpretation of what their performance might be.”

The issue of what makes an actor an actor first surfaced when Andy Serkis did Gollum in “The Lord of the Rings,” but skepticism remains over whether it is the same as live-action acting.
“What an actor is doing when acting is not just looking like something but expressing something going on inside,” says James Lipton, host of Bravo’s “Inside the Actor’s Studio.” “I’m not sure that motion capture, while it captures the flicker of an eyebrow, the twist of a mouth, a gesture of a hand, equally captures emotion.”

Film professor Richard Brown [hehe, "dick brown"] doesn’t agree. “This is very much the first film of the 21st century,” Brown said. “What we need to do is expand our concept of what the word actor means. It’s unfair to take performances as good as these and not designate them as actors.” [THR]

I’d love to weigh in on this, but seeing as how I just awarded my Japanese sex robot a coffee mug that says “World’s Greatest Sexbot,” I might be a little biased.  I also think a guy playing an American who still has an Australian accent maybe doesn’t deserve consideration for acting’s highest honor.  But what do I know, I’m just a guy who loves sexbots.

I09 recently got a hold of the above still of Jake Sully, which takes place after the deleted bar fight scene.  In the scene, Jake Sully sees some guy slap a woman and decides to give him a paraplegic-style beat down. But fighting someone else’s fight and trying do the right thing only gets him thrown out, where he lies in the street, sprawled in the shape of a crucifix.  Now, I know what you’re thinking, bros – “A biblical allusion — in a sci-fi movie?!?  That’s insane!”

But it’s true.  James Cameron went there.  Turns out Avatar was even more of a game changer than we thought.  Game.  Changer.

Nothing against Sam Worthington — I don’t have strong feelings about him one way or another as long as he doesn’t touch my stash — but Jesus Christ.  Hollywood seems really determined to stuff him down our throats.  The latest is a Latino Review report (confirmed by Hollywood Reporter) that he’s in talks to play Vlad the Impaler in Dracula: Year Zero for Alex Proyas (Dark City, Knowing).

This is a period retelling of Dracula.  Like back in Transylvania and sh*t.  Vampires and Vlad the impaler. [LR]

Matt Sazama and Burk Sharpless wrote the spec, which explores the origin of Dracula, weaving vampire mythology with the true history of Prince Vlad the Impaler. It seeks to depict Dracula as a flawed hero in a tragic love story set in a dark age of magic and war. [HR]

A vampire who loves a human?  Oh, Sam Worthington, can’t you ever date one of your own species?  Anyway, I like to think of my middle school years as a dark age of magic and war.  A dark age of magic and war and inappropriate boners. Meanwhile, Dracula: Year Zero is a stupid title, unless the year zero refers to the year Jesus was born.  And I hope it does, because Jesus vs. Dracula is the only worthy sequel to the Passion of the Christ.

(I love these retards)

As you already know, Avatar took home the best picture drama award at the Golden Globes last night.  Which makes this “Abridged Avatar Script” so much more timely.  Excerpt:

STEPHEN LANG
I’m the film’s bullheaded tough guy.  Welcome to Pandora.  There’s not enough oxygen here to breathe, though it’s worth mentioning there is enough oxygen for totally awesome explosions.

SAM WORTHINGTON
Is the gravity at least the same?

STEPHEN LANG
Actually, we’ll be constantly mentioning the lower gravity here, but it will somehow have absolutely no effect on anyone.

[...]

BLUE SAM WORTHINGTON
Oh f-ck, I think I wandered into a Joel Schumacher movie.  Someone, get me out of here!

BLUE ZOE SALDANA
(subtitled) You should not be here.  Jesus, am I subtitled with the Papyrus font?  F-ck it, I’ll speak English.

BLUE SAM WORTHINGTON
Take me to your tribe leader.  I need to become a member of your people.

BLUE ZOE SALDANA
Absolutely not.
(pause)
Alright.

Yeah, it’s good stuff.  Check out the rest of it over at The Editing Room (thanks for the tip, JordeeVee).  Here’s something else you may not know about Avatar; Zoe Saldana is actually 12 feet tall.

James Cameron is totally daydreaming about some blue titties right now.  [source]