Probably the best part of Drive was the embroidered scorpion jacket Baby Goose wore everywhere he went. They never made any attempt to explain it or give it any kind of context*, because why would they? It’s a satin quilted scorpion jacket. Someone wanting to wear that all the time is self-explanatory. In fact, I think the first thing I said after I got out of Drive was “I want that scorpion jacket.”  And since I’m predictable and unoriginal, now they’re on sale.

I wish I was rich so I could buy them out of these and I’d have the only one. What? Just because I like Baby Goose doesn’t mean I have to share his views on sharing.

The off-white varsity-style jacket, embroidered with the yellow insect [Editor's Note: scorpions are arachnids, asshole] on its back, is being sold by vintage specialists, Steady Clothing, for $159.99.
With a sale date expected on 15th November, the site is now taking pre-orders.
The replica stays true to the original, as worn by Gosling’s unnamed and largely silent character known only as Driver.
The film’s costume designer, Erin Benach, told GQ magazine recently that the inspiration for the jacket style came in part from Gosling:
‘Ryan was really inspired by these Korean souvenir jackets from the Fifties. We got to this idea of a white quilted satin jacket with a scorpion on the back. The scorpion came a little later – that was inspired by this Kenneth Anger video Scorpio.’
‘We built the jacket from scratch. We used a tailor in Los Angeles… We had maybe ten different styles tested: we had a baseball cut for the shoulders, then we had a regular sleeve cut. We tried so many styles to nail the one that fitted and looked the best,’ Benach told the magazine.
The colour, an off-white creamy silver, was especially chosen to work with lighting and photography – Benach explained that white would have been too harsh for the scenes.
And it was almost scrapped altogether. ‘At one point we just thought, “Let’s go back and make it olive green or red” – but in the end we all fought for saving the white jacket because we loved so much.’ |DailyMail|

“Here I am, girl. Rock you like a hurricane. But only if you want me to, girl. …Here, you can wear this if it gets chilly.”

*A few people have now pointed out that late in the movie, Baby Goose’s character makes reference to the story of the scorpion and the frog (as a metaphor for his character, no doubt), which probably explains the jacket. You’re probably right but… “He wears a scorpion because he’s the scorpion, get it?? Hurrrr…” It seems kind of lame to me. I like my version better, where he wears a righteous jacket because it’s a righteous jacket.

"So, Brutus, have I told you about my best friend, Patches? I think you two would get along super."

Ryan Gosling, who most recently made psychopathy huggable in Drive, made headlines this week when he gave his special lady, Eva Mendes a gift certificate (because that’s the kind of thing In Touch reports on) to a restaurant he co-owns. Wait, what?

The Drive actor has gifted his new love, Eva Mendes, 37, with free food – for life – in the form of a VIP card for Tagine, the Moroccan restaurant that he co-owns.
“Eva and Ryan are both foodies, so he surprised her with the unlimited gift certificate,” a friend of the actor tells In Touch.
“He’s looking for something permanent, and he’s hoping that he has found it with Eva. She’s everything he wants.” [InTouch via Celebitchy]

As Dan Hopper at BestWeekEver points out, a gift certificate generally isn’t the greatest gift, and hey, if he owns the restaurant, wouldn’t she be eating there for free anyway? Those are understandable questions. As an Exalted Carebear of Huggalo Nation (I was recently promoted), I feel it’s my duty to explain. See, people are reading too much into this “gift” thing. Baby Goose just really likes giving gift certificates. Gift certificates for hugs, gift certificates for three free foot massages, complimentary dog walking, buy one smooch get one free, three compliments for the price of one — he was going to do all that stuff anyway, a gift certificate is just a super neat excuse to write a personalized note.

“Here, girl, I got us I front row seats to the double-dutch match down the street. I drew them myself.”

As everyone knows, Ryan Gosling is a cuddlesome human snuggle pillow made of puppydogs and cupcake sprinkles, and if he ever disappeared from the public eye, Huggalo nation would be devastated (and as a regional Grand Sparklepony of Huggalo Nation, I’m authorized to make such statements). I don’t want to cause widespread panic, but Baby Goose recently told the Times (via IFC):

“I’ve been doing this since I was 12… I don’t want to act much longer; I can’t do one thing my whole life. I know there are only so many characters I’ll be able to play. It will be over whenever the inspiration dries up.”

Adding (via Movieline):

“I’d like to be making babies but I’m not, so I’m making movies. When someone comes along I don’t think I’ll be able to do both and I’m fine with that. I’ll make movies until I make babies. I have no idea when the handover will happen.”

THE HORROR! But it’s nice to know that even if Baby Goose DOES decide to quit movies (and as IFC points out, it would be a while, seeing as he has two more movies with Drive director Nicolas Winding Refn on his plate, including a Bangkok-set action film called “Only God Forgives” and a remake of “Logan’s Run”, not to mention Gangster Squad and another film with Blue Valentine director Derek Cianfrance), it would only be for the sweetest of reasons — to raise a flock of baby Baby Geese. He may not be the Baby Goose Huggalo Nation wants, but he’s the Baby Goose Huggalo Nation needs.

Go ahead, girl, take a ‘me’ day, you deserve it. I’ll stay home with the twins and when you get back, we can sample my homemade applesauce.

[pic via SocialiteLife]

In Drive, Baby Goose barely says ten words, but manages to embody cinema’s cuddliest psychopath. He’s just this delicious, Asperger’s sundae covered in butterscotch, like a blue-eyed Terminator who kills you with sweetness, and also a hammer.

The best way I can describe Drive is that it’s True Romance, if Tarantino had been snorting ‘ludes instead of coke, with a dash of The Professional and a Cronenbergian flair for the graphic.

Gosling plays a guy with no name who only cares about three things: cars, his neighbors (Carey Mulligan and her son), and his shiny scorpion jacket (to be fair, it is a really sweet jacket). Like True Romance, it’s essentially a love story set in the LA underbelly, where the entertainment industry is just another gangster racket (Ray Chandler allusion implied), and ends in a similar tangle of drugs, gangsters, and money. Oh, and crushed skulls. SOOO many crushed skulls.

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FRIEND SQUAD ASSEMBLE!

Ryan Gosling, that sweet, puppy-loving drink of lemon meringue from the land of maple syrup, famously broke up a street fight in progress back in June (though news of the event didn’t break until a few weeks ago). What had happened was, gentlemen had a disagreement over a painting, which was about to devolve into a donnybrook, when out of nowhere, Baby Goose showed up and gave the aggressor half a hug. That’s when the sky opened up and it rained waffle cones, and everyone shared a milk shake with a hundred straws while the Beach Boys played a live concert and a yellow lab with a red bandanna around his neck ran around licking everyone’s faces. Some say the giggling could be heard from space.

Baby Goose has finally broken his legendary silence about the event in an interview with MTV (video below), and this is what he had to say:

“I’m embarrassed. I think that guy really was stealing that other guy’s painting, so I shoulda just kept my nose out of it. It was sad, because it turns out that… I said to the guy, “Why you doing this?” And he said, “Because he’s stealing my painting.” and I said, “Well how do you know?” and he said, “Because he comes here every day and looks at my paintings.”

Which means the guy was a fan. And he wanted the painting so bad he had to steal it because he couldn’t afford it. So he finally steals the painting and then he’s getting his ass kicked by his hero. And then the guy from The Notebook shows up and makes it weirder. And it just… the whole thing, nobody wins. Nobody won.

And uh, you know what, I had just come from the gymnasium, and I was all… stretched out, and feeling… feeling warmed up. So, I’m embarrassed.”

Oh, Baby Goose, I think I speak for all of Huggalo Nation when I say that there’s no need for you to feel embarrassed. Seeing the good in people is just part of the Baby Goose Philosophy. Its central tenet, in fact. “Here, girl, I wrote you a song about it on the ukulele. You can sing along — it’s to the tune of ‘Baby Beluga.’”

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