(We make Ufford wear the Spock ears)

Folks, I’m not going to BS you or whine about needing some time off because let’s face it, I photoshop Paula Abdul on top of Mexicans for a living.  Digging ditches it ain’t.  However, it is my duty to inform you that I will be sampling foreign booze and going to “museums” for the next few days.  And yes, those quotation marks were meant to indicate Finnish prostitutes.  They have those, right?  Oh God I should’ve done more research, this is going to be the worst vacation ever!

Until I return, enjoy the comedy stylings of two people with whom you should already be semi-familiar, Chodin, man-child extraordinaire and master of penis and pantomime humor, and RoboPanda, some time contributor and finder of about 86% of the funny videos I post.  They’re long time FilmDrunkards from way back and multiple comments of the week winners, so they should have a good grasp on what gets the party started around here.  So be good, and love them like the stepfather who you don’t love quite as much as your real dad but tolerate because he lets you drink in the basement.  And don’t even think about not running up to my car with open arms when I come home to visit or I’ll belt you so hard you’ll wish you didn’t even have an ass.  (Sorry, threats of violence are how I express affection).

PS – You may also have noticed that we have a “Recent Comments” link in the sidebar again… so that’s pretty cool.

Friday Free For All is that time of the week when I post videos that may or may not be timely, newsworthy, or relevant.  Because only your mom works hard on Friday. Send your tips to lance@filmdrunk.com.

Today’s Friday Free for All video comes courtesy of my unpaid research assistant RoboPanda.  It’s by a gentleman who goes by the name of “Ze Frank,” who demonstrates a very cool and simple optical illusion.  Another trick he has is to turn me into a 12-year-old whenever I watch this. I like it when girls hump my finger.  Even if they don’t.

This week’s comments of the week winner gets PUNISHER: WAR ZONE on DVD, which hits stores March 17th (as does the fancy ass blue-ray, your highness).  Patton Oswalt says, “PUNISHER: WAR ZONE is THE BEST time I’ve had at the movies this year,” which is all the endorsement I need. I’d eat a cat turd if Patton dared me to.

As always, the way this works is, when you read a comment you think worthy of recognition, YOU nominate it by copy and pasting it in the comments section of this post (along with a link to that post, pretty please).  Then, the following Sunday/Monday, I’LL pick the winner from among the nominees. The winner gets a sweet prize.  (FYI, the nomination thread is always linked in the ABOUT section).

Let’s begin the runners-up rundown, shall we?  From ECONOMIC DOWNTURN CAUSES BLINGYNESS DECLINE:

Al says, “A Ubell-Meyer Oscar party? I call baloney.”

Read the rest of this entry »

Howdy, folks.  One of my dumb friends is getting married this weekend.  I’ll be out of town for a couple days, so my faithful, unpaid research assistant RoboPanda will be handling posting duties in the interim.

He has my full authority, so if any of you little pieces of shit gets out of hand, I expect to hear about it, and I when I get back you’ll wish you didn’t even have an ass.

Word to your mothers and drunk on,

-Vince

Well folks, there comes a time in every young man’s life when he needs to sample new and exotic prostitutes, and drink crappy domestic beer in a different city.  For me that time is now.

So for the next few days, my self-appointed, unpaid research assistant RoboPanda will be handling posting duties.  We’re all adults here, so I expect you to treat him better than that substitute teacher we set on fire in junior high.  Damn that was funny. 

I’ll be here in San Francisco celebrating the overturning of the gay marriage ban until Tuesday, when it’s back to our regularly scheduled circle jerk.  Until then, drunk on.

-Vince