Because there hadn’t been a new Prometheus clip or still in the last few hours and that simply wouldn’t do, Ridley Scott released (via his YouTube) this new short clip, “Prometheus has landed.” Prometheus is the name of the ship, get it?? The clip doesn’t show us a lot, but we do get a nice broad-side, money shot of the spaceship itself, a lá Michael Fassbender’s dong closeup at the beginning of Shame. Then Idris Elba tells the crew “brace for entry!” (insert Fassmember joke here) and they put on their seatbelts and grab their oh-shit handles, while Elba himself casually strolls through the cabin like it was a hotel lobby. He doesn’t even hold onto anything to stabilize himself, not even Michael Fassbender’s dong, which is probably the first thing I’d grab for if I was losing my balance on a spaceship. I guess the moral here is that even in space, black guys have really good balance.

Read the rest of this entry »

I’m red-green colorblind myself, so this could be a little off-base, but most of the trailers and spots we’ve seen from Prometheus thus far have seemed mostly grey and steel-colored and desaturated. In this new batch of 17 images released at EW, many from the set in Iceland (like the one above), we get lots of vivid blues and yellows. Neat? I mean, I like colors. Also, there’s Charlize Theron’s butt looking all hot in her supertight space pants. In fact, I put this picture at the top because it showed the most butt. That’s an old blogger trick.

After The Avengers and Dark Knight Rises, it seems like Prometheus, which opens June 8th, is the next most-anticipated movie of the summer. But that could just be my love of Robot F. Assbender talking. Look at him, I just want to go everywhere with him, experience the world through his gentle robot eyes.

Read the rest of this entry »

A kindly old man casually ponders your imminent vivisection

One of the upcoming projects I’m most excited about is The Counselor, the first original script from No Country For Old Men, etc. writer Cormac McCarthy, whose had his books and stories adapted to film many times before but has never written a script from scratch. I can’t wait to see unfiltered McCarthy (or less filtered, anyway), if only to see how many lapstrake catamites get joplinned down to the thrapple (I never know quite what he means, but it always sounds delightfully violent).

Last we heard, Ridley Scott is set to direct (I’ll believe it when I see it), Michael Fassbender was in talks for the lead, with Brad Pitt, Javier Bardem, and Penelope Cruz’s names all being mentioned. Today, Twitch and Deadline are reporting that Cameron Diaz is coming on to replace a previously-attached Angelina Jolie. Diaz would play a “femme fatale” named Malkina. Here’s how ThePlaylist describes the script, which they’ve read:

Read the rest of this entry »

UPDATE: Fox has since confirmed that Prometheus will indeed be rated R.

When possibly cocaine-loving Fox CEO Tom Rothman was asked at CinemaCon whether Prometheus would be rated R or PG-13, he told the audience:

“I can assure the fans—I’m very aware of their concern—absolutely they can take it that the film will not be compromised either way.  So if that means that the film is R, then it’ll be an R.  If it’s PG-13, then it’ll be a PG-13, but it will not be compromised.”

“The film will not be compromised” seemed like CEO code for “it will definitely be PG-13 so we can make more money, but don’t freak out, nerds, it will still be good.” And that’s a shame, because a PG-13 Alien prequel sounds kind of shitty. The good news is, an IMDB user bought a pre-sale ticket recently, and the stub seems to indicate that it’s rated R:

Read the rest of this entry »

Someone at Fox apparently thinks they need more than this banner picture to sell Prometheus, and today we have ANOTHER new trailer, which you can watch below. Sidenote: If you don’t want to see this based on Michael Fassbender as an effeminate robot alone, we have nothing in common. This new three-minute trailer has:

• EVEN MORE people moving computer holograms around with their hands!
• EVEN MORE Inception-esque BRAAAHM sound effects (you’ve finally done it, Prometheus! we’re all out of BRAAHMS!)
• The red-headed assassin dude from The Borgias (crap, I’m the only one who watches The Borgias, aren’t I).
• Charlize Theron’s name, which is “Miss Vickers.”
• Stringer Bell being so badass that he pilots his spaceship in a standing position (harnesses are for bitches, yo).

Anyway, that’s what I got from the first 90 seconds or so. Three minutes is way too much of a movie I know I’m going to see anyway. NERD BONER: ENGORGE.

Read the rest of this entry »