Alternate headline: FURTHER PROOF LIFE NOT FAIR
Lost in the retarded publicity stunt that was putting Marge Simpson on the cover of this month’s Playboy (honestly, to anyone who buys Playboy for the promise of seeing a naked Marge Simpson… let’s never hang out) was the alternate cover featuring Victoria’s Secret model Alina Puscau. Who’s Alina Puscau, you ask? Why, she’s Brett Ratner’s girlfriend, and he shot the cover and her pictorial. That’s right, when he’s not breathlessly tweeting from a Jonas Bros concert, butchering the English language, or directing terrible movies, Brett Ratner sleeps with a Victoria’s Secret model. Allegedly. Normally I’m highly in favor of looking at pictures of naked women, but imagining this girl’s body with the Rat Man’s nacho cheese-stained paws all over it is a total boner killer. I wonder if they paint each other’s nails and talk about Miley records. (I guaran-goddamn-tee you Brett Ratner refers to all celebrities by first name only, just dying for someone to ask who he means.)
Reached for comment, Brett Ratner just sent me this:
(Hef pickup line: “Does that kitty drink powdered milk?”)
I’ve fiddled with various ways to introduce this story for about 40 minutes now, but the long and short of it is that Hugh Hefner recently said on Twitter that he was meeting with Diablo Cody about the Playboy/Hugh Hefner biopic movie:
“Meeting with Diablo Cody to talk about the Brian Grazer Playboy film today.”
Aaand that’s pretty much all we know. At one point, Brett Ratner was set to direct this project, but with Youngblood (the comic book), Beverly Hills Cop 4, and a big cheesy pile of nachos bellgrande currently on his plate, that’s probably not going to happen. Diablo Cody is an avid Twitterer herself, and though she’s said plenty about buying Hanes underwear and reactions to ‘J-Bod’, she says nothing of a Playboy movie. So does this mean Diablo Cody is going to write the script for the Playboy movie? Maybe. Or maybe Hef just wanted her to read it. Or maybe he needed some zingers about Brian Grazer’s hair. But whatever they discussed, I’m sure the room smelled like Thai food.
[via Cinematical]
As you can see, this month’s Playboy features House Bunny star Anna Faris on the cover. It hits newsstands this Friday. What could possibly be bad about that news, you ask?
While Faris doesn’t appear nude in Playboy, she actually told me recently she was definitely tempted to strip down for the mag.
"I felt really sexy," she told me of the shoot. "I found myself totally getting into it. I was like, ‘Let’s just take it all off.’ " (Her publicist convinced her otherwise.) [E!]
BOOOOOOO!!!!! Thanks for the advice there, Lieutenant Cockblocker. A hot chick who doesn’t get naked is like a child without laughter, or the petals of a flower without the morning dew. People like Anna Faris’ publicist should literally be shot in the face and dumped in the sewer.
A couple new TV spots for Tropic Thunder have hit the web (after the jump) and this month’s Playboy with an interview of Ben Stiller has just hit my mailbox. Requisite discussion of his character Tugg Speedman:
What makes it comedic is the way he ends up a prisoner of his own image. He gets captured in the Golden Triangle by a remote tribe of heroin traffickers who force him at gunpoint to reenact scenes from Simple Jack, in which he played a mentally impaired farmhand who can talk to animals. This was his big, serious movie – his Oscar bid. It is being universally ridiculed except in this tiny jungle compound where they love it so much they make him perform it at gunpoint on a sort of Gilligan’s Island stage five times a day. It’s the only movie they’ve ever seen, so he’s kind of worshipped and humiliated at the same time.
Discussion of his possible motives for making the movie:
Playboy: You were born into a show-business family. Weren’t you just kind of in?
Stiller: God no. IN fact, that’s where the idea of Tropic Thunder came from. Around 1985 all these Vietnam war movies were being made. I never got any of the roles. I even met with Oliver Stone. Nothing. I remember the guys who got those parts were always doing interviews about going off to boot camp for two weekes, how it was the toughest experience of their lives. They had to camp out, shoot guns, eat C rations, all of that. There was something so ironic and funny about actors talking about how hard it was to go off to boot camp for two weeks for a movie about a war when it obviously had nothing to do with the real experience of war. It might have been my own bitterness about not getting parts in these movies, but I did think there was the seed of something in the irony of actors taking themselves too seriously. Maybe this movie is my revenge.
I think another good revenge on actors is to ask them what the capital of Thailand is and then yell "Bang cock!" and punch them in the nuts, because it’s hard to take yourself seriously when you’re in crotch pain. Trust me, I’ve done the research. Also, I think "eating c-rations" is a pretty sweet euphemism for cunnilingus. Anyway, just keeping it high brow here like always, folks.
![\](http://www.filmdrunk.com//ul/55-Anna_FarisMain.jpg "\")
Usually, posting girlie pics is the domain of WithLeather and WWTDD, but hey, i like hot chicks too. "You hear that, mom? I'M NOT GAY."
Anyway, this is Anna Faris on the set of some stupid ass movie from comingsoon.net.
The 2008 movie centers on a Playboy bunny (Faris) who gets kicked out of the Playboy Mansion and becomes the house mother to the lamest sorority on campus. Dana Goodman, Emma Stone, Kat Dennings, Katharine McPhee, Rumer Willis and Sarah Wright co-star.
They're all SFW, sadly. One time I dressed as a girl and joined the hottest sorority on campus. I fell in love with a girl who I'd once seen as only eye candy, but came to realize had a heart of gold. I think she was falling for me too, but she still thought I was a girl! What to do?!
Anyway, yadda yadda yadda, we both taught each other a lot about livin' and a little 'bout love. We're married now. Go fuck yourself.
