Burt Wonderstone is currently shooting in Las Vegas, with veteran TV director Don Scardino working from a script by John Francis Daley (the mouth-breather kid from Freaks and Geeks) and Jonathan Goldstein (Horrible Bosses). In the film, which I assume will be like a sitcommy version of The Prestige, Steve Carell and Jim Carrey play dueling magicians. Which I suppose would explain why Jim Carrey is dressed like Johnny Depp on an average day.

[pic source = MovieWeb, SocialiteLife]

I first told you about Ben Affleck’s Argo a few months ago, his third directawrial effit fawllowing the awbvious and totally wahrranted success of The Town, GO SAWX. It’s based on a 2007 Wired article, “How the CIA Used a Fake Sci-Fi Flick to Rescue Americans from Tehran,” about how a group of CIA operatives passed themselves off as the crew of a fake sci-fi film called Argo to rescue diplomats who’d gone into hiding after the Iranian revolution. Affleck will play CIA ‘exfiltration specialist’ Tony Mendez. Cast also includes Bryan Cranston, Alan Arkin, and John Goodman.

Empire just broke the first official image, and all I can think about is how much Affleck is a dead ringer for Harry Ellis in Die Hard (played by the incomparable Hart Bochner). Only he’s playing him very serious. That was always what I liked about Harry Ellis, he never took things too seriously. “See that watch? It’s a Rolex.”

“Babe, I negotiate million dollar deals for breakfast. I think I can handle this Ayatollotrash. Hey! Sprecken sie talk*? Homeini! Bubbie! …I’m your white knight.”

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Empire Magazine has two covers for its latest issue featuring Christian Bale as Batman and Tom Hardy as Bane from The Dark Knight Rises, which opens in July. They’re calling this “The Ultimate Exclusive!”, and it must be very exciting for people who don’t have the internet. I still think Bane’s mask thingie looks like an elaborate ball gag. I can’t be the only person who looks at that and thinks of hardcore gay sex.

[Empire]

The tagline underneath the green Wahlberg nutsack logo is "our family. our story. our burgers." Seriously.

Having to sit on the sidelines while Burnsy wrote up that last story about Ben Affleck, Matt Damon, and Whitey Bulger gave me a serious case of Boston-vernacular blue balls. BUT GUESS WHAT, CAWKSUCKAH! MAHKY MAHK JUST OPENED HIS FACKIN’ BURGAH RESTRINT, AND I’M HEAH TA COVER IT! POW! FEEL IT, FEEL IT!

Seriously though, remember “Wahlburgers?” The restaurant chain that Mark and Donny Wahlberg decided to start discovered in New York and stole for their brother, Paul (pictured, center)? Well, it had its gala opening last night in Hingham Shipyard. AND I CAN EXCLUSIVELY REPAWT THAT THEY SERVE THE BEST FACKIN BURGAHS IN MASS! RIGHT NEAH DA FACKIN’ HAHBAH! ALL THE MOVIE STAHS AND SAWX PLAYAHS WERE THEYAH! IT WIZ LIKE THE ENTOURAGE OF BURGAH JOINTS, ONLY MOAH CLASSIAH!

The brothers Wahlberg – at least a few of them – joined mom Alma at last night’s opening of Wahlburgers, the clan’s new “casual food” franchise in Hingham.

“At least a few of them?” There were four in the pictures – Mark, Donny, Paul, and Jim – how many goddamn brothers are there? These Irish, they’re like pale, drunk Mexicans. (Factual note: there are nine Wahlberg siblings).

“This is in the spirit of the family,” said Donnie Wahlberg, referencing a menu that includes a Triple Decker. (“Like the house we grew up in.”)

Triple deckah, like owah house! Awl owah burgahs ah named aftah facets of owah Wahlberg childhood. WAITAH! BRING ME A DELINQUENCY MELT WITH EXTRA SHOUTING! MAHKY’S GONNA THROW IT AT AN AWRIENTAL!

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Here’s the cast of The Princess Bride (1987) all back together for an Entertainment Weekly photoshoot. That’s Wallace Shawn, Billy Crystal, Carol Kane, Chris Sarandon, Cary Elwes, Robin Wright, Mandy Patinkin, and Christopher Guest, from left. Fred Savage didn’t show up, probably because he’s a dick. It figures. They barely finished the movie with all his interruptions anyway. Peter Falk and André the Giant couldn’t be there either on account of partying with Rip Torn at an alternate dimension wine tasting skeet shoot. I realize Rip Torn is still alive, but the man throws a hell of a seance.

Here’s some video of the cast on Good Morning America. It looks like Cary Elwes got into some of Mr. Burns’ nerve tonic.

[via Bohemea]