The A-Team movie just released a batch of new pictures from the movie, in case you’re one of those people who prefer their photos not projected in rapid sequence to create the illusion of motion.  I just wish we could decide once and for all whether keffiyah scarves are for hipster pussies or special forces guys so I can exercise my God-given right to punch hipsters without worrying about getting my trachea stomped.  As Nathan Hale famously said, “I regret that I have but two fists with which to punch hipsters in their stupid face.”

[via ComingSoon]

A reader over at CHUD snapped this spy pic from the set of the Red Dawn remake in downtown Detroit.  Which is impressive, as I would’ve assumed one would have to attempt to dress and act like a homeless person in downtown Detroit in order to blend in, and that doing something like pull out a camera is like begging to be robbed and murdered.  Anyway, the picture apparently shows the new American flag after a surprise invasion by the Chinese.  It gives me hope that this movie will be xenophobic as all hell and let us relive the glory days of cold war action movies.  Remember when Rambo went back in time and won the Vietnam war?  That was awesome.  Maybe this bit of revisionist history will stop the Chinese from being so uppity.

[full pic at CHUD]

RELATED ASYLUM POLL: What was the greatest cold war film?

The New York Times just published a batch of new images from Where the Wild Things Are, but since we’ve been talking about this movie since this site started and there’s still a month to go before it comes out, I’m gonna make you head over there for the in-depth character descriptions.  For now we’ll just call this guy Jar-Jarceratops, this one will be Labia Goat, and this thing is the Little Birdhouse in Your Soul.

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Entertainment Weekly has an Iron Man 2 cover story this month, and features the first pictures of Scarlett Johansson as Black Widow.  It barely looks like her. Which is probably a good thing, since normally she looks less “action hero” than “girl who smokes a lot.”  You’ll also notice she has red hair, because all chicks in superhero movies have to have red hair for some reason.  That’s why when I have sex with redheads I like to shout “I’m a superhero!” at the point of orgasm*.  Also, instead of fully undressing, I like to put my penis through the hole in the front of my Spider-Man underpants.  Chicks love it.  Ask around.

[via Cinematical]

*I meant my orgasms, of course.  Everyone knows women don’t have orgasms.

It would’ve been nice if Yahoo had gone live with these new pictures from Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland this morning with the others so I could’ve posted them all at once.  It would also have been cool if the smallest picture wasn’t Mia Wasikowska as Alice, the one whose picture I most wanted to see (she just seems pretty and nice).  But alas, God hates me.

The other picture is Matt Lucas (from Little Britain – woof) as both Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum. At first I was really impressed with the makeup job they did on him, but then I realized that’s pretty much what he already looks like.  I heard Little Britain was a big hit in the U.K. and I tried to watch it a couple times, but it just seemed like a more annoying, male version of the Tracey Ullman show.  I didn’t really see the appeal, but it’s yet more evidence for my thesis, British People Are Inexplicably Fascinated by Cross-Dressing.