After the jump you can watch the just-released teaser for Fox’s (who else) Marmaduke, featuring the voice of Owen Wilson.  In just 41 seconds it manages to squeeze in both “California” by Phantom Planet (formerly of the opening sequence of The OC) and Tupac’s “California Love.”  It’s all part of the new tourism campaign for California. California: The dogs in sunglasses state.  COWABUNGA!  *rides off on skateboard, falls down*

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Continuing their tradition of making actors do embarrassing stunts for money, Fox has hired Owen Wilson to be the voice of Marmaduke (rest of the cast here).  Fox is essentially Hollywood’s answer to the guys from Bumfights.

Wilson’s boarding is the last piece of the puzzle for the live-action/CG movie, which has shades of Fox’s surprise smash “Marley & Me” [i.e., it involves a dog -Ed.] and follows a family named the Winslows who move from Kansas to Orange County with their dog Marmaduke, a slobbery pooch who creates chaos wherever he goes.  Tom Dey (Shanghai Noon, Failure to Launch) is directing, and John Davis is producing the family comedy, which has a June 2010 release date. [THR]

For his part, Owen Wilson has been preparing for the role by playing basically the same character in You, Me, and Dupree.

MATT DILLON:  “Dupree! Did you crap on the carpet again?  You’re the worst house guest ever!”
OWEN WILSON: “Hey, man, I’m a free spirit.”

(*air guitar*)

^{I said the bikini top, not the necklace!  Stupid dog.}

Well, it had to happen.  The makers of Marley and Me have finally put out a trailer that isn’t solely about the adorable puppy.  But even with Jennifer Aniston and Owen Wilson featuring prominently, the dog still seems to be the main character.  It gets them into wacky adventures and teaches everyone a valuable lesson about unconditional love.  It’s basically like if Forrest Gump was a dog.
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Marley and Me stars Owen Wilson and Jennifer Aniston and it looks like the kind of half-assed Hollywood rom com garbage that makes me pray for nuke-u-lar apocalypse.  Then they had to go and release this teaser, which wisely decided that adorable puppy + Chariots of Fire > Owen Wilson and Jennifer Aniston.

And then, yesterday in New York I saw the advertisement you see at left (click to enlarge).  God damn it.  This is not fair.  I know this movie is going to suck monstrous sweaty yak nuts, but their marketing keeps striking at my weak spot.  Normally an utterly nonsensical play-on-words tagline like that would be more than enough to awaken my homicidal rage.  But look at that f-cking face.  I would murder the president if the puppy told me to.

Spyglass Entertainment, the studio behind Ghost Town (opening today) has announced that they’ll be making a “vampire buddy comedy” with Owen Wilson toplining.

Entitled Blood Brothers, the film is set to star Owen Wilson in a buddy comedy involving a man and a vampire. Wilson will produce the pic, which sounds like it can go either way (although I wouldn’t put my chips on Wilson anymore). [BloodyDisgusting]

Reached for comment, 1982 said, “Just the other day I called Spyglass Entertainment and told them I wanted my movie back, and now this.”

Spike Lee added, “Blood Brothers.  Starring a white guy.  Be honest, now you guys are just trying to piss me off, right?”