Welcome to another installment of FilmDrunk’s ongoing one-sided love affair with Diora Baird (nude pics here, NSFW, obviously). CHUD reports:
I don’t follow many celebrities on Twitter anymore - most of them are dull as hell - but Diora Baird is a bright spot in my daily feed. Funny, smart and raunchy, Baird’s tweets are always worth reading. And yesterday they got semi-newsworthy.
Baird tweeted this:
Had an audition for the movie Thor today. Character description was ‘pretty, but sturdy with muscle’. Damn type casting.
I tried to get her to spill the beans as to who she would be playing, but all she would say was
I cant say. I’ll go to jail. For real. Had to sign my soul away.
Here’s her twitter, and I’ll post some of the more interesting tweefs below:
Maria Bello is my favorite kind of actress, always willing to bare a breast, flash some kitty, or even wave around a labe or two “if the scene demands it” (if there’s a Sigur Ros song in the background). In fact, one time I took her to my niece’s swim meet and she just stood in the corner smoking cigarettes and growling, “Do I get to show my pussy now?”
Oh right. Anyway, this is the slightly NSFW trailer for Downloading Nancy. I’m not sure what it’s about. What do I look like, Google?
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I ridiculed WWTDD for posting this clip the other day because I was under the impression that you couldn’t actually see any naughty parts*. So to say Winona Ryder is naked in it is a misnomer - saying an actress gets naked in a scene where you don’t actually get to see anything is like saying a girl on the street is naked because she’s naked under her clothes.
But after seeing this screencap (It’s the file at the bottom; might be NWS) that someone was pathetic kind enough to find, I realize I stand corrected. You can totally kinda sorta see a dark part that’s probably her nipple. Good lord, I could probably chop down a tree with this boner I got right now it’s so rock hard. And then I could carve a monument out of it honoring Winona Ryder’s siren-like sex appeal. Oh, Winona, you’ve shoplifted my heart!
So the clip is from Sex and Death 101, which reunites Ryder with Heathers writer Daniel Waters (Batman Returns, Demolition Man) who also directs. Ryder stars as a serial killer named Death Nell** who… wait, seriously? Check please.
*Under the loosest guidelines, this must include at least one of the following, nipplage, labes, muff, or at the bare minimum, partial areola.
**I like how they chose to leave out the K. "We can’t have a character named ‘Death Knell’, that would be ridiculous! I know, we’ll call her ‘Death Nell’! Yes, that’s much more believable."