Here’s “the Nic Cage Awards,” from College Humor. What I got from this? Nic Cage wears a lot of wifebeaters. [College Humor via Clip Nation]

MORNING LINKS
Steven Seagal tries out his southern accent in ‘Maximum Conviction’ |Film Drunk|

The Hour of Power Hour starring featuring Vince. Get yer tickets. |Events|

Uh, guys… they’ve got a tank. [via Humor Train]

This Photo Of Aziz Ansari And His Parents With Kanye West Wins Everything |UPROXX|

Extended Footage Of Addy, The Delightful Driving Test Stoner |Warming Glow|

This Looks Fun: Zamboni Waterskiing |With Leather|

Surprisingly, Red Isn’t The Most Dangerous Color You Can Wear Aboard The Starship Enterprise |Gamma Squad|

Bonnaroo Announces 2013 Lineup, Booked Everything Except the Kitchen Sink |Smoking Section|

GRUDEN TALK: Jon Gruden Discusses the Russian Meteor With Neil DeGrasse Tyson
|Kissing Suzy Kolber|

Girls with darker skin but lighter eyes sear a hole right through my heart |theChive|

Billy Bob Thornton Will Bang You On Your Period, This Is Information You Have Now |The Superficial|

9 Established Movie Directors Who Also Worked on TV |Mental Floss|

Should They Reboot ‘Die Hard?’ |Film.com|

Toy Story 4 Teaser Poster Leaked! |College Humor|

Are You All Ready For The Zach Attack? |Videogum|

7 Actors TV Would Like You To Forget Are Actually Really Good Looking |Pajiba|

The 9 Worst Oscar Speeches Ever |NextMovie|

Five of the Biggest Video Game Regrets |Unreality|

The Last Harlem Shake |Holy Taco|

You Have to See Andrew Bynum’s Hair |Brobible|

The 7 Greatest War Movie Ensembles |Screen Junkies|

The “Football: The Meal” Looks Pretty Good… |High Definite|

‘Spring Breakers’ Had A Paris Premiere |IDLYITW|

NOMINATE for Comments of the Week. FOLLOW Vince on Twitter.
FAN US on Facebook. SUSBCRIBE to the Frotcast.

If you’ve ever seen a Nicolas Cage movie, you’re probably looking at this article thinking, “Listen, pal. I’ve seen my share of Cage flicks. I already know how insane they are.” Yeah, maybe you have. Maybe you’ve seen Face/Off. Maybe you’ve seen Ghost Rider. Maybe you’ve even seen the infamous The Wicker Man. But here’s the thing. If you haven’t seen Vampire’s Kiss, you haven’t truly “stepped into the Cage.”

The entire movie is ridiculous, from the title screen to the credits. Cage drifts in and out of an unrecognizable accent, furiously recites the alphabet, and flails through the streets of Manhattan yelling, “I’m a vampire!” to no one in particular. But what happened behind the scenes was even more absurd than what what you see on screen.

Read the rest of this entry »

Frotcast Bret sent me this picture, which is fitting, as it’s basically Bret’s entire sense of humor summed up in one photo. After I posted it, I found out it was taken by Meaning of Robots director Matt Lenski. Well well well, small frickin’ world, huh? [via FecalFace]

MORNING LINKS
PICTURED: Sofia Vergara filming a sex scene with Sharon Stone |Film Drunk|

Laremy drops new lists, we talk Beasts of the Southern Wild. |Frotcast|

I don’t know where Jacktion! found this picture, but it’s pretty much the best ever.

The 10 Best Questions And Theories About The Samsung Galaxy ‘Sex Tape’ Commercial |UPROXX|

This Dan Harmon Speech On The Death Of Television Is A Must-Watch |Warming Glow|

The Strangest, Sexiest, Funniest Soccer Manager Calendar You Will Ever See |With Leather|

The Top 5 Best (And Worst) Ice Levels In Gaming History |Gamma Squad|

If You See Katt Williams, Warn A Brother |Smoking Section|

What Mark Sanchez Was Writing On His Clipboard |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

Lindsay Lohan Punched A Psychic Because She Drinks Two Liters of Vodka A Day |The Superficial|

Boy, that escalated quickly |theChive|

13 New Ways To Use Old Electronics |Buzzfeed|

The Time Teddy Roosevelt Saved Football |Mental Floss|

5 Disasterporn Movies Like 2012 |Screen Junkies|

25 Hilarious Pop Culture Snowmen |HuffPost|

Jessica Biel Seems Completely Sane |IDLYITW|

The 40 most gruesome deaths in literature. Stand up Bateman, take a bow. |Fark|

Dog Imitates Baby |Clip Nation|

Adele Butterdance Party! |Videogum|

A Tale of Two TV Pilots: Understanding the Failure of “Wonder Woman” Through the Success of “Arrow” |Pajiba|

Tom Hanks’ Best Roles in Cartoon Form |Unreality|

You’ll Never Guess Where This Dude Was Hiding 2,500 Pounds of Weed |Brobible|

Give A Compliment | Get A Compliment |High Definite|

NOMINATE for Comments of the Week. FOLLOW Vince on Twitter.
FAN US on Facebook. SUBSCRIBE to the Frotcast.

[via /Film]

MORNING LINKS
Lindsay Lohan’s Liz & Dick Poster is pure elegance
|Film Drunk|

15 Band Tattoos No Music ‘Fan’ Should Ever Have Willingly Inked On Their Bodies |UPROXX|

Tony Danza And Tupac Shakur Were Pen Pals|Warming Glow|

Cage channeling his spirit animal. [via The Flying Scotsman]

Caroline Wozniacki Sells Underwear By Being Caroline Wozniacki In Underwear |With Leather|

Five Reasons I Don’t Want A ‘Revolution’ |Gamma Squad|

Man Arrested For DUI On Horseback, Possession Of Marijuana & Moonshine |Smoking Section|

LOLNFL 2012: Week 2 |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

Justin Bieber Was Almost Aborted |IDLYINTW|

10 Musicians Who’d Look Awesome With Skrillex Hair |Buzzfeed|

Too Big to Fail: The Murderer Who Tried to Eat His Way Off Death Row |Mental Floss|

Why unrated cuts on DVD do no service to cinema |Fark|

Cat hammocks are the new hotness |Daily What|

12 Looks Only Kanye West Can Pull Off |Complex|

Chick-Fil-A Stops Donations To Anti-Gay Groups |The Superficial|

8 Types of Karaoke Singers |College Humor|

7 Time Travel Movies That Will Blow Your Mind  |Screen Junkies|

The Six Adventure Time Characters That I Would Most Like To Hang Out With |Unreality|

Lindsay Lohan Is OUR Generation’s Amanda Bynes |Videogum|

11 Hottest 1980s Female Teen Heartthrobs |Pajiba|

The Underwater Art of the Puffer Fish |High Definite|

Attention: Fire Tornadoes Are Coming to Kill Us All |Brobible|

25 Perfectly Timed Photos |HuffPost Comedy|

NOMINATE for Comments of the Week. FOLLOW Vince on Twitter.
FAN US on Facebook. SUBSCRIBE to the Frotcast.

Here’s Shaggy 2 Dope and Violent J of ICP doing an in-depth breakdown of the “Cal Me Maybe” video you’ve probably been trying to avoid. I like the format. What do we call this? Like, “Magnets are a Mystery Science Theater?” …We’ll keep working on a title. [via Fuse]

MORNING LINKS
Fun Excerpts From The Michael Bay Ninja Turtles Script |Film Drunk|

Ohmygahd! Ohmygahd! Ohmygahd! *SQUEEEEEEE* Only one more day until FilmDrunk and Friends! |Events|

Louis C.K. Workshopped New Material At A Last-Minute Show In Brooklyn, Added Impressions To His Repertoire |Warming Glow|

A Golden Treasury Of Cheesy Late-80s/Early-90s WWF Promo Photos |With Leather|

The 15 Funniest Fake Amazon Reviews Of Bic’s Pens ‘For Her’ |Gamma Squad|

The Best And Worst Of Madden 13 |Smoking Section|

The New Rules for Dez Bryant |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

Oh Shut Up, Blossom |The Superficial|

12 GIFs That Prove Kobe Bryant Has Stolen Everything From Michael Jordan
|Buzzfeed|

The ultimate invention for telling your coworkers to screw themselves:
The Isolator |Fark|

Shia LaBeouf Is Very Dedicated |Videogum|

Childrens Hospital Webisode: “What If… Blake Got Another Chance?” |Adult Swim|

7 Famous Movie Bootleggers |Screen Junkies|

5 Movies Where The Characters Know The Soundtracks |Unreality|

Breaking Bad Blue Sky Donuts look tasty |Daily What|

15 Ways 90s Commercials Prepared Us For School |HuffPost Comedy|

19 Wildly Dangerous Home Remedies From 100 Years Ago |Mental Floss|

A Beautiful Look At Curiosity’s Descent Footage |High Definite|

Predicting the Post-Credits Fate of 10 Romantic-Comedy Couples |Pajiba|

The 2012 USA Basketball Team Has a Blooper Reel, and It’s Tremendous |BroBible|

NOMINATE for Comments of the Week. FOLLOW Vince on Twitter.
FAN US on Facebook. SUBSCRIBE to the Frotcast.