Wait, you get a discount for crotchless?  I would think that’d cost extra.  How else you going to get a tail or a ponytail in there?  Sub-comment: What do I take from all these crotch-damaged Na’vi costumes?  Trannies love Avatar.  Sub-comment 2: Crotchless pants 15% off?  Hmm, not ideal, but I can work with it.

MORNING LINKS

• Looking For The Perfect Gadget Gift? |Uproxx|

• Burnsy asks: Can You Trust Credit Cards This Time? |UproxxNews|

• Boy gets detention for farting on school bus. The absolute best part of this story is that it made the local news. |NYCBarstoolsports|

• This is the greatest gif since the Snooki Punch, and it involves choke-’bating. |WarmingGlow|

• I’ve always thought Randy Moss’s bad rep was a bit undeserved, but this latest story has all but changed my mind. |KissingSuzyKolber|

• Sexy tranny wins Scrabble championship. |GammaSquad|

• Lingerie football player weighs in on the QB touching her butt in a very special episode of “The Internet.” |Clutch|

• Amazing new meme: Puff Dog. |Buzzfeed|

• Manny Pacquiao Sings ‘Imagine’ With will Ferrell on ‘Jimmy Kimmel Live’ |BroBible|

• Interesting Facts about the Air Sex Championships |SmokingJacket|

• In honor of Prop 19 passing not passing, the best stoners in movie history. |NextMovie|

• Five douchebags you’ll encounter while voting. Ha, I voted by mail. |HolyTaco|

• The 11 Most Awesome Bill Murray Moments in Ghostbusters |KoldcastTV|

• Nine aliens ju don’ wanna foke weeth, ése. |ScreenJunkies|

• The 20 most successful film franchises of all time. |NERDS!|

• The Star Wars Trilogy Retold Through Paper. |UnrealityMag|

FilmDrunk on Facebook. FilmDrunk on Twitter. The Frotcast on iTunes. Comments of the week

SITE POLL: Question for the Drunkards: What were the best and worst Halloween costumes you saw this year? Email us at frotcast@gmail.com.

So this Estonian lady in Texas dressed her pit bull, Sharky, up in a Na’vi costume from Avatar, and then she dressed up with him and made a video of it.  Sharky didn’t seem to like his Na’vi mask very much, but he was really cool about the family of baby chicks crawling on him.  …You guys?  Can I make a confession? I think TexasGirly1979 could be “the one.”  We could dress our dogs up in movie costumes and have a family of baby chicks — blue ones! Just like the Na’vi!  And it would be just the two of us, and we’d live off the fat of the land, with furry puppies and kitties and chicks in costumes to play with.  Oh please, tell me about the baby chicks again, Estonian lady!  Let’s touch queues and dream together!

I’ve got the video below.  Meanwhile, elsewhere in tangentially-movie-related, former Eastern Bloc dog news, Tret the Parkour dog from Ukraine is setting the world on fire.

Read the rest of this entry »

The Grove mall in L.A. is about to host a massive Avatar event, and I don’t think anyone involved in the planning has been to an Avatard forum to realize what a terrible, irresponsible idea this is.

Lucky shoppers at LA’s The Grove on April 16th won’t have to put in nearly as much effort to look like the blue citizens of Pandora when an interactive Avatar exhibit goes live at the outdoor shopping venue.

The event, which is designed to celebrate the DVD and Blu-ray release of Avatar — due at retailers on Earth Day, April 22nd [Seriously, Earth Day? -Ed.]– is co-sponsored by Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment and Inwindow Outdoor. It will feature state-of-the-art facial recognition technology that will turn fans into characters from the film in real-time.

The exhibit will be a 60′ x 10′ freestanding, decorated structure encircling the main statute at The Grove and will feature three “morphing stations.” As shoppers approach, the cutting edge facial recognition technology will lock in and transform them instantly into the blue-skinned creatures from the film.  Once done, users can enter their email address through a touch-screen and have video of their transformation emailed to them. [Cinematical]

Jesus, this thing might as well read “CALLING ALL WEIRDOS: COME TO THE GROVE MALL AND MAKE ALL YOUR DREAMS OF FREAKY BLUE CAT SEX COME TRUE WHILE WE RECORD IT FOR YOU TO MASTURBATE TO LATER.”

Read the rest of this entry »

Remember when the Avatard forums wondered if there were gays on Pandora (“while I watch the film, I can’t help but imagine that in the world of AVATAR, there’s no such thing as hatred, homophobia, or intolerance”)?  Well, what gay nightclubs in South Florida presupposes is, yes.  Yes there are gays on Pandora, and they have glorious shirtless gay dance parties (gays and Na’vi have that in common).  Here’s the description from MiamiNewsTimes (via TheAwl):

Men, and the occasional guidette, danced to stock tribal house in varying degrees of undress. The place was a jungle. Literally. [Editor's Note: Not literally.] This wasn’t your typical circuit party, The Living Room in Ft. Lauderdale was in the middle of an “Avatar”-themed party. And it wasn’t the only one.

They painted the floor with fluorescent colors, and covered the ceiling with weedy netting to resemble a canopy. The typically scantily clad bartenders were scantily clad again, only bluer. Drag queens Na’vi-ly accessorized with head-dresses and day-glow makeup. The club even hired a face-painter to bedazzle the gays, gratis.

When asked why, of all the movies to organize a theme party around, they chose “Avatar,” Leonard got reflective. “The drama of the movie parallels the drama in the nightlife world,” he says. “Everyone’s calling the police on each other, liquor license inspectors, booking celebrities against each other.” [Ed. Note: Me-yow, *cat hiss*]

But, Jason Tucker, one of the organizers of Gaylaxicon, the annual queer sci-fi convention, doesn’t see the parties becoming ubiquitous. The mainstream still sees sci-fi as unhip, he says. And James Barrett, a former convention attendee, says that while in “someone’s fantasy-writing some poor human has already been fisted by a Na’vi,” the movie is not likely to explode as a fetish object in the gay community for that same reason.

I know they mean to reference “galaxy”, but “Gaylaxicon” seems to have a rather unfortunate laxative connotation.  Anyway, here’s a riddle for you: if a gay Na’vi goes to a glory hole, what does he stick through the hole, his real wiener or his tail/brain wiener deal?  Also: what did the gay Na’vi say to the other gay Na’vi at the Pandora-themed glory hole?  “I c. you.”  Okay I’ll stop.

(Protesting dressed as a Na’avi is all fun and games until Quaritch shows up)

A coalition of environmental groups recently took out this full-page ad in Variety to protest Canada’s oil sands industry, which they call “Canada’s Avatar Sands.”  It reads in part:

Where indigenous Peoples in Canada are endangered by toxic pollution and future oil spills

Where Shell, Exxon, BP, and other Sky People are destroying a huge ancient forest.

Where giant Hell trucks are used to mine the most polluting, expensive unobtanium oil to feed America’s addiction.

JAMES CAMERON, WE SEE YOU

Oh I get it, the italics are stuff from the movie.  Anyway, Canada is the largest foreign oil supplier to the US, and environmentalists contend that oil sands, which make up half those exports, are damaging to the environment.  Meanwhile, the oil industry says it’s doing everything it can to help aboriginal communities and minimize environmental impact.  And besides, they say, how else is the U.S. going to break its dependence on oil from the Middle East, and those goddamned dirty gollums that live there?  This is isn’t f-cking Narnia.

(ad via HuffPo)