It seems a little sketchy that this story was uncovered by the “Alien Disclosure Group,” but even if you don’t believe the alien angle, at the very least the kid is a real-life mutant. Nong Youhui here lives in a village in southern China, and was born with bright blue eyes. Aside from being lucky that they weren’t green (or else Lo Pan would be all over his ass right now), Nong can apparently see in the dark, which he demonstrated by completing a test underneath a stairwell while Chinese journalists “used blankets to block out most of the light.” While Chinese journalists aren’t exactly known for strict adherence to the scientific method, this is clear evidence that the alternate future predicted by the X-Men movies is almost upon us. If I were this kid, my X-Men name would be “Peeping Tom.”

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^{Mom thought letting her baby weight train was cute until she got caught in his triangle choke.}

As if to save me from the evil robot baby in the last story, I found this story about a toddler with a rare genetic mutation that makes him super strong.

A three-year-old Michigan boy is super-strong. He can move furniture, hold five-pound weights, and do sit-ups with ease. Liam Hoekstra likely has a condition called myostatin-related muscle hypertrophy, which means his body has very little fat and enlarged muscle fibers that make him exceptionally strong. Because Hoekstra is so strong — he falls, for instance, without getting hurt – he is not learning the appropriate fear judgment of a child testing his or her limits.

Super strong and without fear?  Quick, get him some spandex!  So anyway, I clicked on the video all ready to see muscle baby here perform feats of strength, but all they did was talk about psychological effects and potential health problems and lame crap like that.  Talk about lazy reporting. You could at least break a two by four over his back.
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Yesterday, a New York Times writer posted a thought-provoking blog about the search for a cure for autism, and the resistance amongst the autistic community, who don’t want to be cured.  Though I’d rather gargle pus than read the entire pretentious exercise, the highlight was surely when the writer used X-Men 3 as an analogy, and even quoted Brett Ratner.

A genetic difference is often adaptive and can be regarded as an advance in the evolutionary process; it is well-known that autism sometimes brings with it remarkable powers in the areas of music, art and mathematics. In the 2006 movie “X-Men: The Last Stand,” the augmented powers of those known as “mutants” are even more remarkable and include the ability to walk through walls, to move metal objects as large as California’s Golden Gate Bridge, to auto-generate fire [Pyro can only manipulate fire, he can’t generate it, stupid] or ice, to be in seven places at the same time, to read minds, to assume any identity, to kill with a touch, to fly like Icarus [perhaps not the best person to cite in a simile meant to illustrate the ability to fly…], to change the weather.

It might seem meretricious [Yes! Meretricious*! That’s exactly the word I was looking for! …] and insensitive to link a serious condition like autism with the heroes and anti-heroes of a comic book fantasy. But the link is encouraged by the film’s director, Brett Ratner, who said on About.com that the story “has strong racial, political and sexual aspects” and wonders, “What if … African-American[s] could take a pill [that would] ‘cure’ them of being black or if a gay could take something that would alter his sexuality?” That is, what if a condition scorned by the majority but prized by the minority that inhabits it could be eliminated by a simple injection? What would the minority do?

Gee, thanks for explaining Brett Ratner’s high-minded allegories to us simpletons, New York Times writer guy.  Autism awareness is of course just one of the many causes in which Brett Ratner is actively involved, including Fat Acceptance and the Society for the Recognition of the Exceptionally Mediocre.

*mer·e·tri·cious
–adjective

1.  alluring by a show of flashy or vulgar attractions; tawdry.

As in: My word, what a meretricious outfit your mother is wearing!  Thanks to her diaphanous bloomers, I can nearly see her baby cave.

[Thanks to the Brave Sir Rob for the tip]