Below, the first trailer for Death at a Funeral (2010). The original Death at a Funeral came out in 2007, and even though it’s only two years old and in English, they remade it with an American, mostly black cast (Peter Dinklage is in both versions — if not an Oscar, he deserves some kind of Most Valuable Dwarf award).  Wicker Man director Neil LaBute directs the remake.  Alan Tudyk‘s turn as a guy frying on hallucinogens the whole time is taken over by… James Marsden.  The only thing that could save this is lots and lots of Tracy Morgan.  Danny Glover pooping on his hand notwithstanding, it looks like he doesn’t have a huge part. The studio should cut that scene with the scene of J-Lo trying to keep semen from spilling out of her vadge, and then film the audience puking and use that as the promo, Paranormal Activity style.

Hey, did Chris Rock just utter the phrase “bromantically involved?”  Is that because they were both guys or because they’re black?  From the style guide:  Bros = white guys with arm band tats.  Brothers = black dudes.
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Jamie Foxx and Martin Lawrence made the above trailer, Skank Robbers, featuring their characters Sheneneh and Wanda, as a bit for the BET awards.  Audience reaction was said to be huge, and I imagine a lot of black women got out of their seats and pumped their fists and screamed because that’s what black women do at stand up shows.  They’re the best audience, easily.  Anyway, they’re going to make the fake trailer into a movie (a la Machete) for Screen Gems, because Screen Gems is basically Fox on a smaller scale.

Foxx will write the script for “Sheneneh and Wanda”, and he and Martin will produce together through Foxx’s Foxxhole and Lawrence’s Runteldat production banners.  In the comedy, Sheneneh and Wanda are modern day independent women trying to make it on their own, one bank robbery at a time. [Variety]

As a sketch it’s a decent concept — “I know the baby’s Chris Brown’s ’cause it keep tryin’ to kick me” — but can you really stretch a few one liners and funny makeup into an entire movie?  Who do they think they are, the Wayans brothers?  Also, when I was researching this, I started to type “Sheneneh and Wanda” into Google, and it suggested “Sheneneh and Wanda Sykes.”  Which means either Google is racist, or someone’s already gotten a head start on writing the next BET Awards parody trailer.

In these lean economic times, movie studios are sticking with safe bets on proven earners, earners like Big Momma’s House, which grossed $174 million worldwide plus $138 million for Big Momma’s House 2.
*slowly takes a sip of coffee*
*spits coffee on screen*
ARE YOU EFFING KIDDING ME?  THE BIG MOMMA’S HOUSE FRANCHISE MADE $311 MILLION?!  Okay.  Sorry.  That’s out of my system now.  Anyway, Fox hired a writer for Big Momma’s House 3 and you know she’s good because she wrote a movie where The Rock plays The Tooth Fairy. *air guitar*

Fox may be ready for more Momma as the studio has tapped Randi Mayem Singer (“The Tooth Fairy”) to pen “Big Momma’s House 3.”  Logline’s under wraps for the second sequel, with New Regency and David Friendly attached to repeat their producing duties from the first two pics. [Variety]

It’s good to hear that the plot is a closely-guarded secret.  There’s nothing worse and going to see Big Momma’s House 3 and having some a-hole ruin the twist ending.  SPOILER ALERT: Rosebud is Martin Lawrence in a f’cking fat suit.

(Welcome to Earff!  You’re under arrest.)

Good news, folks, Columbia pictures just put Bad Boys 3 into development.  The only real question is whether Martin Lawrence is too big of a star since the grand slam of Big Momma’s House 2, Wild Hogs, College Road Trip, and Welcome Home Roscoe Jenkins.

Columbia Pictures is developing a third installment of the high-octane “Bad Boys” franchise, tapping Peter Craig [Sally Field's son - really] to pen the screenplay.

The hope is to have a script that would reunite director Michael Bay, producer Jerry Bruckheimer and stars Will Smith and Martin Lawrence. At this point, with the project in the early stages, none has a deal to return. The “Boys” movies feature Smith and Lawrence as Miami detectives Mike Lowrey and Marcus Burnett, caught up in cases involving car chases and explosions. [THR]

“Captain? We’ve received word that some terrorists are planning to take over the esplanade.  The case could get… explosive.  And we’ll need someone with… car chase experience.  But who?  Ever since we started the Connecticut program, our only recruits are wannabe desk jockeys and snot-nosed pencil pushers.”

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Yo, remember Coming to America?  What if we did that, but in reverse.  With Martin Lawrence instead of Eddie Murphy!

Alcon Entertainment has acquired “Back to Africa,” a pitch that will be drafted as a potential star vehicle for Martin Lawrence.
Lawrence hatched the pitch and will produce the film.
The comedy centers on a working-class man from Queens who discovers he is heir to the throne of an African country and travels there to claim his birthright. [Variety]

“Hatched the pitch” is just the kind of befuddled retard metaphor for which Variety is so famous.  But in the writer’s defense, this idea does sound like something that came out of an asshole.