Your Mid-Week Guide To DVD And Streaming: Safe Haven, Jack Reacher And More

Written by Ashley Burns / 05.07.13

“Sometimes I just take the seat off and ride for hours.”

Welcome to this week’s installment of Your Mid-Week Guide to DVD and Streaming. Our beloved Morton Salt is currently nursing a hangover after attending the Metropolitan Museum’s Gala as Sarah Jessica Parker’s merkin. In the meantime, I’m going to recommend a bunch of movies for you to watch this week and then talk about at your next parent-teacher conferences.

This week’s streaming pick: Hemlock Grove on Netflix. I know it’s not a movie, but I just started watching this series and eventually I’d like to have other people to complain about it with. So watch it and then we can pretend that we’re experts together. [Vince's Note: Screw Burnsy, watch Top of the Lake so we can whine about how everyone mumbles.]

On DVD and Blu-Ray this week:

Safe Haven
Mama
Jack Reacher
Steel Magnolias (2012)
Norman
Starlet
The Oranges
Mighty Fine
The Assassin’s Blade
If I Were You
In the Hive
Revenge for Jolly!

Now let’s get to the meat and potatoes.

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Weekend Box Office: Arnold’s Comeback Bombs

Written by Vince Mancini / 01.21.13

Oh hey there, Jessica Chastain’s boobs

The Guillermo Del Toro-produced Mama debuted at number one over the weekend, once again proving that modestly-budget horror movies are the closest thing to selling legalized crack. It also benefited from the lead actress’s Oscar nomination coinciding with its release. I didn’t see it, but I’ve been sneaking up behind all my friends and whispering “…mama.” all weekend. Meanwhile, Broken City, Allen Hughes’ first solo-directed film without his brother, Albert, with whom he directed Menace II Society, Dead Presidents, and Book of Eli, landed down at number five, with a fairly uninspired nine million. Let’s face it, you dump a movie starring Mark Wahlberg and Russell Crowe into a mid-January release, it’s a pretty good indication that that movie is a fartbomb.

Estimated domestic box office totals for Friday to Sunday.

1. Mama (Universal/Entertainment One) NEW – Cinemascore: B-; Metacritic score: 58

$28,100,000 in 2,647 theaters; PSA (per screen average): $12,530; Cumulative: $28,100,000

2. Zero Dark Thirty (Sony) Week 5; Last weekend: #1

$17,600,000 (-28%) in 2,946 theaters (+9); PSA: $5,974; Cumulative: $55,945,000

3. Silver Linings Playbook (Weinstein) Week 10 ; Last weekend: #10

$11,351,000 (+126%) in 2,523 theaters (+1,713); PSA: $4,499; Cumulative: $55,310,000

4. Gangster Squad (Warner Brothers) Week 2; Last weekend: #3

$9,100,000 (-47%) in 3,103 theaters (unchanged); PSA: $2,936; Cumulative: $32,220,000

5. Broken City (20th Century-Fox) NEW – Cinemascore: B; Metacritic score: 49

$9,000,000 in 2,620 theaters; PSA: $3,435; Cumulative: $9,000,000

But perhaps the biggest story of the weekend is that The Last Stand, Arnold Schwarzenegger’s return to the movies after a nine-year hiatus spent banging maids and governing states, which had all the country’s most obvious-minded critics shouting “Arnold Schwarzenegger is back!”, debuted all the way at number 10, with an estimated $6.6 million.With its $45 million production budget, Indiewire estimates that Lionsgate could be looking at a $50 million loss, unless it makes it up internationally. Though that doesn’t factor in The Last Stand‘s Corvette sponsorship money. But not only did hardly anyone see it, the ones that did gave it a fairly lukewarm B cinemascore. Which is odd, because the Rex Ryan-esque man sitting next to me at my screening kept yelling “HA!” so loud at every joke I thought he was going to shake loose a molar. I didn’t like it that much, but… I don’t know, it seemed like a crowd-pleaser. It does seem weird to have so many hyper-violent, R-rated movies that otherwise seem to be aimed at 10-year-olds.

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Weekend Movie Guide: Does Anyone Know The Plot Of ‘Broken City’?

Written by Ashley Burns / 01.18.13

“No, I will not say hello to my mother for you.”

Opening Everywhere: Broken City, The Last Stand, Mama

FilmDrunk Suggests: This is a tough one, because I think Mama looks fantastic, but I know other people are going to give it the “Ugh, not this crap again” that I typically give to these kinds of horror movies. So I guess that one’s a toss-up, but The Last Stand looks like a heaping pile of HGH-injected dung, so I’m not recommending that one. Most of you will probably see it anyway, but Johnny Knoxville as an action film sidekick gives me flashbacks of Rob Schneider as an action film sidekick.

And then there’s Broken City. It looks about as inviting as this week’s HOTT GOSS Song of the Week.

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