VIDEO: ‘Dead’ deer wakes up in car, runs from cops in real-life Tommy Boy scene

Written by Vince Mancini / 03.20.13

When you’ve seen Tommy Boy in excess of 50 times like I have, you can remember and quote every scene. But even a casual viewer can probably remember the scene where they hit a deer and put it in the back seat, only to have it wake up and destroy the car. Ahh, the nineties, such a simpler time. Yeah, so, it turns out, almost that exact scene recently played out in Kalamazoo.

Kalamazoo Department of Public Safety Officer David Miller was on routine patrol, around 2:20 a.m. Tuesday, and checking parking lots. He encountered a suspicious person sitting in a parked vehicle behind a hotel in the 3700 block of E. Cork Street.
Officer Miller contacted the male, a Kalamazoo area resident, and the two had a brief discussion.
Miller’s attention was drawn to the trunk area of the vehicle. The man hit the trunk release and said, “I hit a deer, I figured you would want to see it.”

That’s interesting, because “I hit a deer, I figured you would want to see it” is actually listed at number four on my list of “The 10 Best Pick-Up Lines to Use in Kalamazoo.” Also, why was Miller’s attention “drawn to the trunk area of the car?” Was it the thumping sounds and braying?

The vehicle owner claimed to have a dead whitetail deer in the trunk. He said he accidently hit the animal with his car on an outlying area roadway, according to a news release. The man told Miller he intended on utilizing the meat from the road kill to feed his family. “The officer merely wanted to check on the tagging of the deer to make sure it was appropriately tagged with a kill permit or accident permit,” explained KDPS Lt. Stacey Geik.

Because, yeah, I’m sure a dude sitting in a parking lot at 2 am with a deer in his trunk that he planned on eating made sure to file a full report and complete all the relevant paperwork. “Here you go, officer, my ‘Permit to Bag and Eat Roadkill,’ filled out in triplicate.”

Miller cautiously opened the trunk and the deer sprang from the trunk.
“Oh, he’s still alive,” Miller exclaimed as the deer emerged.
The deer jumped to the ground, fell down, got up and then ran to a nearby wooded area.
“He held his ground nicely,” Lt. Giek said of Officer Miller. “So I’m proud of him.”

Yes, there is video.

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South Carolina Woman Arrested For Selling VHS Porn Door-To-Door

Written by Ashley Burns / 03.11.13

“You, uh, you wanna buy some porn?”

One of the reasons that I haven’t watched any news programs in months is because it’s just depressing to see how many people in this country are hurting from the recession and how few people can find decent-paying jobs to care for their families. Even worse, when people try to go out and carve new paths for themselves, they’re usually just struck down by government-backed corporations, because the common man should never be allowed to take from the plates of the wealthy.

Such a story is being told in South Carolina this week, as 52-year old Jeanette Ellis was arrested for trying to put food on her table by selling products door-to-door just like hard-working Americans once did. What kind of products? The porn kind.

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Homeless Hitchhiking Hatchet Hero: My new favorite IRL superhero

Written by Vince Mancini / 02.04.13

Excuse my non-movie-related digression here, but I just saw this story over on WarmingGlow and thought it deserved an immediate double post because it’s probably the greatest thing I’ve ever seen. Basically, Kai here is a homeless hitchhiker. The other day, a 300-pound lunatic picked Kai up in his truck in Fresno. Then the guy told Kai he raped a 14-year-old in the Virgin Islands once, declared himself Jesus, and pinned an innocent bystander with his truck and bum rushed a few women. Luckily Kai had a hatchet in his pack, and Kai smashed the guy in the head with the blunt end before he could hurt anyone else. An event Kai describes as “f*ckin’ gnarly man. It was like the biggest wave I’ve ever ridden in my life,” in probably the greatest local news interview of all time, with Fox affiliate KMPH. We Fresnans don’t have a lot to be proud of, but I think Kai just shot to the top of the list. Sorry, Kevin Federline.

If you watch any unedited news interview today, let it be this one:

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Weatherman doing his report in Elvish proves New Zealand is even nerdier than you thought

Written by Vince Mancini / 11.29.12

Do I still need to list all the ways in which New Zealand has become a giant Lord of the Rings gift shop? Hobbit money. Hobbit airplane safety videos. Hobbit sculptures in the airport. Hobbit passport stamps. And things really reached a crescendo this week as The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey had its premiere in Wellington. How bad was it? Well, this guy did an entire summer weather forecast in Sindarin, one of the Elvish languages generally spoken between elves and- oh God I just wedgied myself it burns. You guys know there are going to be two more of these movies still, right? It’s like an entire country full of dorky, over-eager dads! New Zealand’s official motto: “Aw, dad! You’re embarrassing me!”

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Come see me and my friends do comedy tonight

Written by AMB / 11.13.12

Hey, remember past Frotcast guests Matt Lieb and Leslie Small? We’ll be doing some comedy tonight in San Francisco along with Justin Harrison, who’s recording a CD. It should be fun. Tonight, 8 pm, The Punchline. Tickets right here.

MORNING LINKS
MUST-WATCH VIDEO: Happy Madison’s Peter Dante urges LAX Bros to not be so Bro-y |Film Drunk|

Kick back and relax with some schnapps, a chaser beer, and a pack of cigs while you take in the latest Frotcast.

The quick glimpse of horror in the little dog’s eyes is priceless.  [via Awesomephilia]

Did you know Vince will be telling some jokes tonight at the Punch Line? |Events|

This Is Justin Bieber’s Alleged New Girlfriend, In Case You Weren’t Already Mad At The World |UPROXX|

Mary-Kate Olsen And Her 42-Year-Old French Boyfriend Enjoyed A Very
Normal Moment This Weekend |Warming Glow|

Mel Gibson Caught A UCLA Basketball Game, Might Have Glanced At A
Cheerleader |With Leather|

Five Reasons You Don’t Actually Want A Faithful “World War Z” Movie |Gamma Squad|

Event Recap: Crown Royal And Playboy Kick Off “Crown Royal Heroes
Project” With Class |Smoking Section|

Philadelphia’s Andy Reid Hatred Has Gone Bilingual |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

Facts that might make you gasp |theChive|

Blonde Zooey Deschanel Was The Worst Thing Ever |Buzzfeed|

Karlie Kloss Upset Native Americans, Easily Offended White People |IDLYITW|

15 Behind-the-Scenes Secrets of Wreck-It Ralph |Mental Floss|

Car Bows |Holy Taco|

‘The Simpsons’ Karl Rove Blackboard Gag Mocks Fox News Meltdown |HuffPost Comedy|

Heidi Klum’s Breasts Will Make It All Better |The Superficial|

Gay Men Will Marry Your Girlfriends |College Humor|

Nitro Circus Crash Montage |Clip Nation|

The Three Major Theories of Time Travel |Unreality|

TV’s 9 Most Surprisingly Sexy Characters |Pajiba|

The 10 Biggest Train Wreck Teams of the NFL |Brobible|

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