MUST-WATCH VIDEO: Happy Madison’s Peter Dante urges LAX Bros to not be so Bro-y

Written by Vince Mancini / 11.12.12

So I was in the middle of pissing my pants laughing at this overly-earnest video from Lacrosse Playground (“Don’t Be a LAX Bro”) urging lacrosse bros to not be so bro-y — sample quote: “I love this game more than anything in the world. It’s been the most important thing in my life. (*points at netty stick thingy*) This is the key. This is the instrument. This is my paintbrush.  You guys have an opportunity, and it starts in here. (*points at heart*)” — when all of a sudden, PETER DANTE SHOWS UP!

You may remember Peter Dante as Adam Sandler’s buddy who we last saw inexplicably donning different outfits, urging us to see Bucky Larson in a series of relentless TV spots on Comedy Central. He’s in virtually every Sandler movie and features prominently in Burnsy’s guide to Happy Madison. I didn’t know he was into lacrosse, but if I was any less surprised the news, my face would turn into an actual line-mouth emoticon :-|

DANTE: “We are all a brotherhood, we are all a family. We do not like the term ‘lacrosse bro.’ Lacrosse bro is a kid who is not respectful. A kid who’s mouthy, a kid who doesn’t listen, a kid who is an individual. You’re a part of that fraternal order because you’re a team.”

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Kellen Lutz stars in sappy, homo-erotic lacrosse drama

Written by Vince Mancini / 11.22.11

It’s been a while since I’ve posted one of those indie, painfully earnest family dramas — a BooBoo Stewart vehicle, something sponsored by WalMart — where the incompetence of the filmmakers is outweighed only by their total earnestness. Which is a shame, because they’re pretty much my favorite thing. Today brings us a wondrous bounty called A Warrior’s Heart, a lacrosse drama starring Twilight‘s Kellen Lutz and Chord Overstreet (“I know what both of those words mean, but together they’re just a mess…”). The two share one of the most awesomely homoerotic locker room scenes since Val Kilmer’s air bite in Top Gun. “I don’t want you ridin’ my tail, and you know why? Because you’re dangerous. If you’re gonna ride my tail, punk, you better be gentle.”

Oh boy, let’s enjoy this together:

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THE FUTURE IS GAY

Written by Vince Mancini / 09.14.07

In case you were looking for a way to make lacrosse gayer (and, frankly, I didn't think it was possible), take a hint from this clip from Solarbabies.

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