I clicked play on the trailer for Seeking a Friend at the End of the World (the directorial debut of Nick & Norah’s Infinite Playlist screenwriter Lorene Scafaria), prepared to see Steve Carell slumming it in yet another mediocre broad comedy, but instead it opened with a catchy plot – the mission to save Earth has failed, there’s an asteroid on a collision course with Earth and everyone has three weeks to live – then our buddy Rob Huebel showed up, and by the time Patton Oswalt arrived as a boozy dude drinking wine straight from a carafe at an end-of-the-world booze orgy, I had already glee-fainted and was leaking saliva on the linoleum. Excuse me for saying, but this looks really good! Oops, I don’t often use exclamation points, as I consider them campy and effeminate. GRRR, FOOTBALL.

Read the rest of this entry »

After the jump, you can watch the first trailer for A Dangerous Method, David Cronenberg’s latest (and first since Eastern Promises in 2007), starring Viggo Mortensen as Sigmund Freud, Michael F. Assbender as Carl Jung, and Keira Knightley as some crazy slut Jung’s banging. It has far less Freud snorting tons of coke and screaming about his penis than I hoped for (HISTORICALLY ACCURATE!), but… well, there’s no happy ending for that sentence. I was disappointed.

Starring Viggo Mortensen, Michael Fassbender, Keira Knightley, Vincent Cassel and Sarah Gadon and based on the play by Christopher Hampton, the film centers on the conflict between Sigmund Freud (Mortensen) and his pupil Dr. Jung (Fassbender). Seduced by the challenge of an impossible case, the driven Dr. Jung takes the unbalanced yet beautiful Sabina Spielrein (Knightley) as his patient. Jung’s weapon is the method of his master and both men fall under Sabina’s spell.

Read the rest of this entry »

No doubt in celebration of his many great achievements, such as the invention of the hamburger and the invisible cell phone, and shooting 38-under par the first and only time he played golf, North Korean leader Kim Jong-Il (Lil’ Kim) recently allowed his citizen-children to view the film Bend It Like Beckham on State Television.  This is of course the motion-film in which a youth from the east cures a youth from the west of materialism, and the comrades utilize teamwork to defeat the great imperialist homosexual, Jonathan Rhys Meyers.

The 2002 film starring Keira Knightley and Jonathan Rhys Myers was a break from the regular programming of news, documentaries and soap operas. Western films are largely off limits in the isolated country.

The broadcast, monitored in Seoul on Dec. 26, appeared to be edited; it was only an hour long.

In a tweet Thursday, British Ambassador to South Korea Martin Uden called the broadcast the “1st ever western-made film to air on TV” in North Korea. The British Embassy arranged it.

“Bend it Like Beckham” features a sport beloved among North Koreans, but it also taboo topics, like interracial relationships, homosexuality and religion. [AP]

“Beckham” was of course a famous blacksmith, the title referring to the legend that he once forged 87 plowshares in a single day, his only reward the glory of his country, before courageously dying of exhaustion.  Analysts say the film was seen by a crowd of dozens, perhaps hundreds, on the single communal television in the revolutionary square at the National University of Electricity.

This is the trailer for London Boulevard, the directorial debut of Departed screenwriter William Monahan (who also wrote Body of Lies and Kingdom of Heaven) starring Colin Farrell and Keira Knightley.  Between the Clash soundtrack and the fancy typography, it certainly looks Guy Ritchie-y.  I miss Colin Farrell’s Irish accent, which makes every line at least 50% funnier, but I was onboard until the money line:

“If I fell in love with you, what would you do about it?”

“Everything.”

Ray Winstone is in this too, but after that exchange, I couldn’t help picturing every character as Autofellatio Walrus.

Read the rest of this entry »

(“Sorry, B, the uniform just seemed a lil f@ggy, nah mean?”)

It seems like this Captain America tour has been going on forever and today, THR reports that it’s taken a detour through mumbly wigger town.  That’s right, Channing Tatum was reportedly “approached”, son.

At this stage Tatum, who just wrapped filming on the Steven Soderbergh action flick “Knockout,” has only been approached for the role and has not seen a script.  And the search is on for the female lead. Details for the part are being kept secret for now but it is rumored to be his flame Betsy Ross (ironically, named after the woman who is credited with creating the American flag). Keira Knightley was approached last week, but the studio is also looking at other actresses.

Yes, Keira Knightley as Channing Tatum’s love interest. I can’t imagine that being more perfect or believable.  “Damn, girl, I macked on some fly honeys before, but you… you like hella classy, huh. Is you Australian or somethin?  I betchoo all into, like, books an’ shit, huh. Haha, *mumble, mumble* nah mean?”

Still, both are just names being thrown around that will probably come to nothing. Hitfix yesterday reported that Ryan Phillippe is also “being considered.”  Of the names I’ve heard so far, he seems like the best.  I think it’s saying something when the guy first known for curly hair and pouty lips is the one who seems most like a masculine superhero.  I’d tell you what that something is, but it’s probably a homophobic slur.