Much like Bucky Larson, Katherine Heigl’s One for the Money was abruptly Trojan-horsed into theaters without being screened for critics this past weekend. But unlike Bucky Larson (still 0% after 35 reviews), One for the Money was able to win one fan (sort of!), bumping its recommended rating up to a whopping 3%. I’ve compiled here the ten most glowing quotes from Scott from MovieBuff‘s beaming two-and-a-half-star review. I also added exclamation points, because although they weren’t in the original review, I felt they captured the spirit of the review.

I think my favorite was “She never quite pulls off the Jersey persona but she comes close enough!”

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"After a while your agent stops calling and the next thing you know, you're doing movies with... well, you."

Opening Like The Gates Of Hell: One for the Money, The Grey, Man on a Ledge

FilmDrunk Suggests: I’m digging the previews for Man on a Ledge. Maybe it just looks better than it is because One for the Money previews air every six seconds, thanks to some half-tard exec who thinks that people still love Katherine Heigl.

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Katherine Heigl recently starred in a Funny or Die video (which you can watch below – spoiler alert, it’s “die”) and contributed her time to a new charity campaign by the Jason Heigl Foundation* called “I Hate Balls.” Of course it’s about neutering your pets, what were you thinking?

The multi-media initiative kicks off with the launch of a new website IHateBalls.com, that features an original Public Service Announcement starring Katherine Heigl and produced by Funny or Die.
The video also sets the tone for the campaign – a funny take on a very serious issue – and features not only Katherine Heigl and some four-legged friends, but a cameo by her husband, musician Josh Kelley. At the witty IHateBalls.com web site which hosts the video, visitors are offered a number of opportunities to support the campaign, promote the message, raise awareness and get involved.
Heigl explained, “Launching this campaign is hopefully the type of out-of-the-box thinking we need to heighten awareness of the devastating problem and sound the alarm that we can save many lives by simply spaying/neutering pets. Hate balls, fix pets, save lives. It’s just that simple.” [jasonheiglfoundation]

Now, let me preface this by saying that promoting the spaying and neutering of pets is completely valid issue, and in the long run, by far the best way to keep innocent little puppies and sad Sarah McClachlan dogs from getting needlessly gassed. It’s a good thing. But when you already have a reputation as a humorless shrew, hey, maybe a hilarious campaign called “I Hate Balls” isn’t the best thing for you.

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I’m worried Kat’s coat doesn’t have enough flaps, it looks pretty rainy out there. Or as Donkey Hodey put it, “it’s like the world’s cuntiest couch.” Though in the designer’s defense, it looks like it might button over the top of her head, which could be helpful. “But grandma, what big stupid glasses you have.” |WWTDD|

MORNING LINKS
Awesome People Hanging Out With Bill Murray |UPROXX|

Zooey Deschanel Will Put A Scarf And Skinny Jeans On The World Series |With Leather|

Katherine Heigl is in New Year’s Eve, but I like my poster better.

Steven Seagal Character or Porn Actor? Frotcast 70. |Film Drunk|

Game Over, This is the World’s Greatest Baby Costume |Film Drunk|

Zombie Barbie: Finally A Barbie Doll We Can Support |Gamma Squad|

’80s Sitcom Predicted Year of Gaddafi’s Death |Warming Glow|

Best Twitter Reactions To The Death Of Muammar Gaddafi |Buzzfeed|

Forget drunkorexia, Olivia Munn is into drunkersize (and drunk writing, it seems). |FARK|

Lindsay Lohan’s porn double tries to do her community service for her. |TheSuperficial|

John Travolta was too fancy for KFC. Good for you, KFC. |Videogum|

Desiree Neiman has a bikini, likes to wear it. |GorillaMask|

13 peaceful protests and whether they worked. |MentalFloss|

The top five movies spawned by the Blair Witch Project. |Nerve|

Do The Acid Freakout Shuffle of the Day |The Daily What|

Five Horror Film Curses You’ll Swear Are Real |The Smoking Jacket|

Come Up with the Best Reverse 80′s Remake. Win a Pajiba T-Shirt |Pajiba|

7 Anti-drug films that really make us want to do drugs. |ScreenJunkies|

Paulo Filho is doing great. |CagePotato|

15 Awesome Horror Movie Posters |Unreality|

10 reasons to have your next meal at the heart attack grill. |HolyTaco|

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After the jump, you can watch the new trailer for New Year’s Eve, a sh*tty collection of half-assed clichés full of pretty people and happy music because Hollywood thinks you’re stupid. But first, it’s a trailer for another Katherine Heigl movie, One for the Money (Hollywood’s Assumption: AMERICA LOVES KATHERINE HEIGL).

It’s based on the first of Janet Evanovich’s Stephanie Plum novels of the same name, and comes from director Julie Anne Robinson, who previously directed Miley Cyrus in that Nick Sparks movie where she saves a nest of sea turtle eggs from a raccoon and finds love when a stranger spills her milkshake during a game of beach volleyball. Whoa, what happened? I think I blacked out for a while. Anyway, I read a Janet Evanovich book once. All I can remember is that Stephanie Plum had a fat, sassy black assistant who was always smuggling bacon and ham in her purse because she was on the Atkin’s Diet. I’m guessing that would be Sherri Shepherd in this. Aw, she’s like a female Anthony Anderson — she’s even got the alliterative name! Fat, sassy, and black is one HILARIOUS way to go through life! And she’s never thought about whether the world is flat, which kind of makes her One for the Money’s Target audience.

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