Nope, that title is not an accidental repeat from last year. British actor and comedian Ricky Gervais has been invited back to host the Golden Globes once again, despite his last hosting gig that was marred with despicable things like him being funny, charming and refreshing. The Globes, more commonly known as the Special Olympics of film and television awards, consist of the Hollywood Foreign Press making tough-but-fair and long, earnestly conceived decisions regarding the best of movies and TV for the past year. Some say that the event’s prestige and dignity are rivaled by none. Others say *fart noise*.

The return of Gervais just might make the show watchable for the second straight year, as his performance at the last ceremony was filled with such highlights as making fun of Mel Gibson and, well, a bunch of other stuff, but really it was all about his joke about Mel’s drinking. And now he gets to do it again, after Mel’s ridiculous year. This is going to be comedy heaven.

Who does the award for Best Celebrity Who Can’t Take a Joke go to, Variety?

Reviews for Gervais’ first outing were Goldilocks-like — some critics thought he was too mean to some of the assembled celebrities, while others thought — given the wicked edge of his past work — he wasn’t provocative enough. And others thought he was just right.

His best line at a 2010 awards show, ironically, came at the Emmys, when he took a pointed dig at Mel Gibson: “I’m not going to have a go at him; he’s been through a lot,” Gevais [sic] announced, referring to the beleaguered star’s recent scandals. Then, after a perfectly timed beat, he added, “(though) not as much as the Jews.” At the Globes he chided Gibson a bit more mildly.

I included that excerpt about his best line because it’s certainly a good line, but come on… is that better than: “I enjoy a drink as much as the next guy, as long as the next guy isn’t… Mel Gibson!” I think not. But you can see for yourself in the collection of Gervais Golden Globe highlights after the jump…

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My copy of this month’s Playboy hasn’t arrived yet, probably because my mailman is Puerto Rican and everyone knows those people steal.  Or I don’t know, maybe he’s just taking a nap. What am I, his parole officer?  Anyway, there’s an interview with James Cameron in it, and it sounds like he’s his usual, curmudgeonly self.

“I made Titanic because I wanted to dive to a shipwreck, not because I particularly wanted to make the movie…Titanic was about ‘f*ck you’ money,” he said. And on Kate Winslet almost dying while filming: “We simply let Kate think she was nearly drowning. A little sputtering and coughing does not count in my book, because I have almost drowned several times…Anybody who signs on [with me] is going to be tested.”

On his 25th high school reunion: “If you ever go to a 25th high school reunion, make sure that in the previous two months you’ve made the world’s highest-grossing movie, won 11 Academy Awards and become physically bigger than most of those guys who used to beat you up. I walked up to them one by one and said, ‘You know, I could take your ass right now, and I’m tempted, but I won’t.’ Actually, they were all nice guys except for one who was still big and mean. I left him alone.” [Cinematical]

Cameron later went on to clarify that The Abyss was more about ‘love me, daddy’ money, while True Lies was ‘you think you’re better’n me’ money, and if all goes well, Avatar will make piles of ‘is it in yet’ money.

What can I say, folks, I consider it a good day any time I get to use “vag” in the headline.  The occasion is a story about The Reader, in which Kate Winslet had a nude scene like she always does. And as she told Allure, she had grow out her beef whiskers in order for her chatch to look more period-appropriate.  …

Winslet tells Allure in the June issue that when filming “The Reader,” she had to grow in the hair “down there,” so to speak. She tells Allure, “because of years of waxing, as all of us girls know, it doesn’t come back quite the way it used to. They even made me a merkin because they were so concerned that I might not be able to grow enough.” [MSNBC]

Wigs or no wigs, It’s a good thing they got it right.  I can totally picture myself standing up in the theater yelling, “EXCUSE ME, THIS DYSLEXIC NAZI’S PUSSY ISN’T HAIRY ENOUGH!”  But I do that at most movies.

^{Only two velvet jackets?  Such restraint.  (picture courtesy of JustJared, obviously)}

That I searched for Golden Globes pictures and the first thing that popped up was a shot of the Jonas Mannequins should tell you just about all you need to know about this retarded farce.  In other news, Katie Holmes is looking really bad these days.

List of winners after the jump, plus, see Demi Moore present Heath Ledger’s Best Supporting Actor award to Chris Nolan.  Such a surprise that Ledger won.  Took a lot courage to pick him over Tom Cruise in a fatsuit, I bet. Also, if anyone could tell me what the hell’s going on here that’d be great.

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If you’ll remember, The Reader was the movie that caused the big fight between Les Grossman look-alikes Harvey Weinstein and Scott Rudin – a Jewhaha, if you will.  The movie will be out January 9th (not in time for awards season like Harvey wanted) and the trailer just hit today.

It stars Ralph Fiennes as a German who discovers the older woman (Kate Winslet) who touched his ding dong when he was younger is on trial for being a member of the SS.  She liked it when he read to her – from “The Odyssey”, “Huck Finn”, and “The Lady with the Little Dog” – hence the title.  It was adapted from the book by Bernhard Schlink.  Meanwhile, The Lady with the Little Dog was adapted into a critically acclaimed film starring Linda Lovelace.
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