Whoa, Big Momma’s House 3 and Yogi Bear on the SAME DAY??  What God did I please!  But anyway, yeah, it’s a 3D Yogi Bear movie with Justin Timberlake and Dan Aykroyd (nice try disguising your voices there, guys, but you do realize we have Google).  The studios have got appealing to the 6-year-old brain down to a science at this point (anything else would require ambition), which means that this has all the standard elements of every lame children’s film: a fart joke, CGI characters dancing to pop music, and someone getting hit in the butt a bunch of times (all kid movie protagonists spend half the movie smiling at the camera and swinging their butts from side to side, has anyone else noticed this?).

Basically, it’s exactly what you’d expect.  My only question is, where are the semen-filled bears I was promised in the poster?  Don’t tell me I have to wait for Yogi Bare.

Here’s the new trailer for Yogi Bear, WB’s 3d-enizing of the Hannah-Barbera sort-of classic.  If you were in our how-long-will-they-go-before-the-characters-dance-to-hip-hop pool, the folks who had “zero seconds” were the big winners.  Congratulations, Steve in accounting.  Anyway, they paid Dan Aykroyd and Justin Timberlake a bunch of money to provide the voices, and they both do Yogi and Boo-Boo impressions that leave them nearly unrecognizable.  It seems to me kind of like paying Morgan Freeman to read an entire book on tape in a Daffy Duck voice, but at least they managed not to imply that the bears have gay sex this time, so there’s that.

He’s (*fart*)er than the ave-ver-age bear!

[via IGN]

(Diora Baird is really open-minded)

David Fincher’s The Social Network looks like a slick, Oliver Stone-y take on the Facebook founder to the point that it borders on parody, but there’s a silver lining to that cloud: a scene where they snort cocaine of chicks’ boobs, like in Any Given Sunday. I hear your mom tried to pull the same thing with some microwave meth, but ruined it by lactating. ;-(

In an article published Friday, producer Scott Rudin told the New York Times that he has been involved in a months-long dialog with Facebook execs to assuage concerns about the film. He said he allowed certain execs to read the script and made changes to accommodate small requests. He also said he had not decided whether to cut or alter a scene depicting Sean Parker [Justin Timberlake], a Napster co-founder who played a major role in the early days of Facebook, delivering a key speech at a party while two young women offer lines of cocaine from naked breasts. One person told the Times that the Parker scene was mostly made up, though Rudin said his main concern about the scene was whether it would jeopardize a PG-13 rating.
Now sources tell THR the scene will remain in the film, set for release October 1. [HollywoodReporter]

Well it’s nice to see that film doesn’t resort to cheap sensationalism.  Also, snorting coke of a girl’s boobs?  That’s sooo passé.  Hey, Social Network, 1975 called, it wants its drug trick back.  You figure out a way to get a cherry lit on a chick’s labes and suck the smoke out her ass like a bong, then I’ll be impressed.

Sidenote: the only bigger coke fiend than Chuck E. Cheese is Chester Cheetah.

I’m trying out a new segment here on FilmDrunk, “Who trailer’d it better?”  I plan to use it whenever I want to combine two trailers into one post.  Today, we’ve got Yogi Bear and Titanic 2.

Yogi Bear
Dan Aykroyd does the introduction and he seems reeeally happy to be here.  In any case, we see that they’ve given Yogi the live-action CG mix treatment, a la Alvin & the Chipmunks and Furry Vengeance.  Aykroyd’s Yogi voice is a little different than the one you’re used to, sort of a cross between Rodney Dangerfield and an old Rabbi, though the CGI bear seems to have all Rodney’s mannerisms. Is it wrong that I was hoping he’d punch a girl?  Based on Nic Cage’s performance in Wicker Man, I’d just assumed that’s what bears do.  Anyway, it took them almost 40 seconds to get to a CGI animal, hip-hop dance scene, compared to 38 seconds for Beverly Hills Chihuahua and 22 for Alvin and the Chipmunks 2.  I am never, ever going to get back the 15 minutes I spent calculating that.

Titanic 2
With a title like that, it has to be good!  From the studio that brought you Transmorphers and Snakes on a Train!

Read the rest of this entry »

(Werner Herzog: “Oont ven I look eento za eyes uff za Yogi Beah, I see nuzzink.  Only za cold eendeeference uff CGI.”)

Remember when I told you about the computer-animated Yogi Bear movie?  You probably repressed the memory like the time your Little League coach got you fitted for a jock strap, but in case you needed a reminder that it was still happening, today they released the official poster.  The film is directed by Journey to the Center of the Earth‘s Eric Brevig, starring Dan Aykroyd and Justin Timberlake as Yogi and Boo Boo, plus Anna Faris and Christine Taylor.  Somewhere, Brendan Fraser stared morosely at his silent phone, a single tear rolling down his cheek.

Also, I just noticed this: what’s up with the cylindrical hole in that pie?  Did they invite Jason Biggs to the pick a nick?

[via YahooMovies]