As I pointed out in my first Golden Globes wrap-up, mainstream journalists are some of the most self-serious d-bags in the world, and they have no idea how to write about comedy, so of course they saw only controversy.  People are used to seeing movie stars get their butts kissed at awards shows, so Ricky Gervais cleverly took the roast approach instead (I read in Popular Science that surprise is an important element of humor).  Most of the audience understood that, and it didn’t seem like that big a deal.

(Slight Digression: One notable exception here was Judd Apatow, who was mildly critical of Gervais, which for a comedy writer/lover is like seeing your parents fight.)

There was a lot of blah blah blah about who was offended and whether Gervais would be invited back (who hosts an awards show three years in a row anyway?), but now Gervais himself has responded, the way all true gangstas respond, on his blog (via WarmingGlow):

Obviously the rumour that the organizers stopped me going out on stage for an hour is rubbish. I did every link I was scheduled to do. The reason why the gaps were uneven is because when I got the rundown I was allowed to choose who I presented to. I obviously chose the spots that I had the best gags for. They couldn’t move around the order but I could move around however I wanted.

All the same conspiracy theories as last year too… “So and so was offended”… “hasn’t been invited back yet”… exactly the same as last time. “Paul McCartney was furious”…no he wasn’t. And nor was Tim Allen and Tom Hanks. I was drinking with them after.

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Today in trade news, it sounds like Bat Mitsvah DJ Paul Rudd is finally catching a break.  Good for him, such a nice boy.

Universal Pictures has signed Paul Rudd and Leslie Mann to star in the Untitled Judd Apatow Project.
featuring an original story with characters created by Rudd and Mann in Knocked Up.
Apatow is writing, directing and producing the June 1, 2012 release, produced by Barry Mendel and Clayton Townsend. [ComingSoon]

So basically, a Knocked Up sequel/spinoff focusing on the Paul Rudd/Leslie Mann relationship.  I’m a Judd Apatow nuthugger from way back, so you throw in Paul Rudd to boot, and I’ll be the first one in line for a ticket, all dressed up like a cholo on Easter.  Hopefully there’s even a part in it for Katherine Heigl, as Leslie Mann’s totally-not-shrewish younger sister who drives well and loves math.

[gif source]

It’s hard to remember a time when getting caught at a jack-off theater could get you thrown out of show business for a decade plus like it did Pee Wee Herman back in ’91. (And isn’t raiding a jack-off theater to catch guys jacking off kind of a d*ck move? Why else would guys be going to the AMC Jack-Off 24?)  These days it wouldn’t even be news if he was a Republican congressman.  But Paul Reubens could soon be the ultimate comeback story for public masturbators, as Judd Apatow is set to produce a new Pee-Wee movie.  The project came about after Apatow caught the Pee Wee Herman revival show, which played to sold-out crowds at the Nokia theater in LA earlier this year.  Said Apatow, “It was brilliant, I sat there jacking off the entire time.”

Judd Apatow is developing an untitled Pee-Wee Herman feature for Universal that Paul Reubens is writing with thesp-scribe Paul Rust [the guy who loved Beth Cooper]. Apatow will produce though he will not helm the project.  Pic is described as featuring the iconic geek in a road pic built around “a gigantic adventure.” [Variety]

So, like, bigger than a “Big Adventure”, say? Anyway, I like Judd Apatow as a director.   As a producer… who knows, you might end up with Drillbit Taylor.  But good for Paul Reubens. I’m sure David Carradine and Michael Hutchence are smiling down from whack-off heaven while they choke ‘bate right now.  I know my grandpa is.

Side note: Paul Reubens is 57 years old.  How the hell is that possible?

I was looking for any excuse to post the “Paul Rudd’s Computer” Tim & Eric video (attached below), and now I have it.   That’s because Judd Apatow is producing a script co-written by Rudd in which Jennifer Aniston is attached to star.  Hey, Hollywood Reporter, can you work the title into a lazy play on words for me?

Universal is experiencing some “Wanderlust.”

The studio has picked up a comedy project with Jennifer Aniston and Paul Rudd attached to star. Judd Apatow will produce.  Rudd will write the script with Ken Marino and David Wain, who will also direct. Rudd, Marino and Wain will also produce.  The story line follows a married couple who tries to escape modern society and ends up in a hippie commune.  Universal hopes to start production in the fall.

David Wain directed Wet Hot American Summer and Role Models, which he also co-wrote with Rudd and Ken Marino– who also stars in the criminally under the radar Party Down.  I guess what I’m saying is that my comedy boner is all ready to go, all you have to do is rub it a little.  Oh right, Jennifer Aniston.  Yeah, she’s usually one note and tends to play every comedy scene as either exasperated or shrill.  But that’s just how women are, isn’t it?  In my experience, their only emotions are “shrill”, “exasperated”, “unconscious,” and “shoppin’”.

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Whoa, this is real.  Feast your eyes on the trailer (sorta NSFW for language and a brief buttcrack or two) for The 40 Year Old Virgin Who Knocked Up Sarah Marshall and Felt Superbad About It.  Hey, I think the title might be a Judd Apatow reference.  And before you ask, the answer is no, surprisingly, this is not a Seltzer-Freebird joint.  The director is first timer Craig Moss and the IMDB page doesn’t list a writer, presumably because they just re-enacted all the scenes from the movies referenced in the title and made them less funny.  I think it might be some new edgy hipster humor, like Garfield minus Garfield.

Shockingly, it doesn’t appear to be getting a theatrical release, and even shockinglier, it’s being distributed by 20th Century Fox.  I’m guessing they’re going after that niche demographic of people who have an enemy they want to do something mean to, but can’t find any dog poop to leave in a flaming bag in their doorstep.  Hence the slogan, “TFYOVWKUSMAFSBAI, it’s like a bag of poop for your eyes.”

[blame Cinematical for finding this]