My Name is Bruce, directed by and starring Bruce Campbell, is sort of like JCVD (trailer) meets Three Amigos.  It opened Friday in New York, and for the next two months, Bruce Campbell will be working his way across the country making personal appearances in every city where it opens.  He’ll be in Philadelphia on Wednesday and in Boston on Friday – see the full tour schedule after the jump.

I’m a little more excited for JCVD than for this, but I can’t deny that Bruce Campbell leaves particles of guys like Van Damme in his wind.  I think he could take Van Damme and Seagal at the same time, especially if he had a chainsaw for a hand.

Trailer also available in HD at Apple.

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Writer/director Mabrouk El Mechri’s JCVD premiered to rave reviews at the Cannes Film Festival (you know it’s good when the none of the quotes in the trailer are from Pete Hammond, Ben Lyons, or AICN). It finally roundhouse kicks American theaters in the face Novermber 7th.  If you haven’t heard anything about it, JCVD is what happens when a guy imagines what Jean Claude Van Damme’s life must be like, writes a movie about it, and then gets the actual Jean Claude Van Damme to star in it.  In short, pure brilliance.  It’s so meta I could eat my own shit.

I also think it’s no coincidence that he shares his initials with “Jesus Christ Venereal Disease”.

If you heard “Hercules movie” and instantly thought it would be some low-budget, b-movie joke, guess again. Hercules: The Beginning is set to be directed by none other than Sheldon Lettich, whom you may remember from his masterpiece, Double Impact (see above and after the jump). I can’t wait.

[Variety]
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Sorry for the slight departure this morning folks, but I just ran across this Bloodsport gif animation, and I think you’ll agree that it’s pretty much the best thing ever. 

OH MY GOD I CAN’T STOP WATCHING IT, IT’S MESMERIZING!

[via HolyTaco]  

 

 

 

 

This is the trailer for JCVD, in which Jean Claude Van Damme stars as a fictionalized version of himself.  We may learn there’s more to him than getting boners on TV and finding new reasons to do the splits. 

In the French-speaking world, Van Damme is well known for the picturesque aphorisms that he delivers on a wide range of topics (personal well-being, ecology, etc.) in a strange mixture of French and English. [9] He is especially well known for his use of the English word aware when speaking French. While delivering an interview for a French channel, he used the English word "aware" in order to introduce the notion of self-awareness as a key of success. [Wiki]

For instance:

- You don’t need a flash to photograph a rabbit that already has red eyes.
- If you work with a jackhammer during an earthquake, stop, otherwise you are working for nothing.
- If you phone a psychic and she doesn’t answer the phone before it rings, hang up.
- A cookie has no soul, it’s just a cookie. But before it was milk and eggs. And in eggs there’s the potential for life.
- I am fascinated by air. If you remove the air from the sky, all the birds would fall to the ground. And all the planes, too.

So apparently, all this time Jean Claude Van Damme has been like the French answer to Jack Handey.  It just goes to show, you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover (it’s still okay to buy pornos that way).