This is the trailer for The Box, from Donnie Darko director Richard Kelly, who hopes to rebound from the commercial failure of Southland Tales. It stars James Marsden, Frank Langella, and Cameron Diaz, who may have given away a big plot secret at Comic Con (go ahead, I know you’re thinking it, “Cameron Diaz reveals the mysteries of her box all too easily.”). Suffice to say, the plot involves a stranger, Langella (ella ella, eh eh eh…), showing up to struggling couple Diaz and Marsden’s house with a box and a proposition: press the button on the box and get a million dollars cash, but someone somewhere in the world who you don’t know will die.
I realize I’m not the best audience for this “dilemma”, especially not today when I’ve spent at least three hours alternately getting screwed by NYC public transportation, searching for a wireless connection, and getting caught in a downpour with my laptop. A million dollars for killing a stranger? Pff, I’d kick a baby into traffic on the off chance it’d make me feel better. Just give me a reason, junior.
This is the first trailer for Donnie Darko/Southland Tales director Richard Kelly’s The Box. It’s based on a Richard Matheson short story called “Button, Button,” which was also made into a Twilight Zone episode. The premise is that a mysterious stranger (Frank Langella) gives a couple (Cameron Diaz and James Marsden) a box with a button. He tells them if they press the button, they get a million dollars, but someone they don’t know will die. I guess back in the 70s this was considered a moral dilemma. If it happened today, my only question would be, “So if I press it twice, do I get two million dollars?”
A remake of Sam Peckinpah’s Straw Dogs (keep your eyes peeled for the sweet headlights shot at the 12-second mark above) isn’t a bad idea in and of itself, but hiring no-name director Rod Lurie (Nothing But the Truth, Resurrecting the Champ ring a bell? …Anyone? …Bueller?) and casting James Marsden as the lead
doesn’t exactly inspire confidence. Nausea, perhaps, but not confidence.
The new “Straw Dogs” follows Los Angeles screenwriter David Sumner (Marsden), who moves with his wife to her hometown in the deep South. Once there, tensions build in their marriage and old conflicts re-emerge with the locals, leading to a violent confrontation. The original, co-written and directed by Sam Peckinpah, saw Dustin Hoffman in the role of Sumner, with the story set in rural England. [THR]
Instead of a violent gang rape and subsequent gun fight as in the original, the new version will have a dance contest followed by an underground MMA fight. It’s essentially the same social critique, just… updated.
Summit Entertainment released the first ten minutes of Sex Drive online, and you can watch it after the jump. I feel bad for this movie, because I feel like it would’ve been a hit if it’d been released before they had a chance to make those 15 direct-to-DVD American Pie sequels. I even take back what I said about James Marsden being a bad choice for this. Still, I’m sick of all these goddamned stories about the biggest nerd in high school who still manages to get laid by the end of the movie. Whatever, dude, we’ll see who’s cool when the real cool guy is writing sarcastic things about you on the internet in ten years. Betcha won’t feel so cool then, will ya? Dick.
Also, there’s some tasty high school chick thong action around the 7-minute mark, and I know how much my lady readers enjoy that kind of thing. Read the rest of this entry »
This is my last post before Vince gets back and starts tannin’ hides and bustin’ rhymes, so I’ll leave you with some words of wisdom from Tracy Jordan: “Live every week like it’s shark week.”
