Two Lovers, James Gray’s romantic dramedy starring Joaquin Phoenix and Gwyneth Paltrow, has grossed only about $2,000,000 domestically despite positive reviews.  Naturally, Gray says the low gross was all C-Joaq’s fault.

“It’s like, Letterman was trying to get the movie out there, but the only thing that’s out there now is a crazy person with a beard making a fool of himself!” says Gray, still seething today at the “circus” surrounding Phoenix. Phoenix claims to be leaving the world of acting to become a rapper, albeit one with a camera-wielding brother-in-law, Casey Affleck, in tow. Gray spits at the name, calling him a “clown”. “I have no idea what the hell that guy is shooting,” he says. “The whole thing is not to my taste, and I’ve let Casey know this.” [timesonline]

Look, dude, it didn’t bomb because Joaquer Texas Rapper was acting crazy, it bombed because the casting was weird.  If you want to make a non-traditional Hollywood rom-dram, don’t cast it like an US Weekly cover.  However, no arguments about Casey Affleck being a clown.  I just wish Crispin Glover had crashed through the window singing “Clowny Clown Clown” to properly illustrate the point.

A lot of people around Hollywood are saying Joaquin Phoenix’s performance art project or whatever you wanna call it is sabotaging Two Lovers, the movie he’s supposed to be promoting.  But guess what, it’s a rom-com with Joaquin and Gwyneth Paltrow, no one wants to see that shit anyway.  For his part, Lovers director James Gray doesn’t know what to make of it either.

“If it is an act, it’s the most committed act I’ve ever seen in my life.”

Now, Gray wonders if he’s responsible for Phoenix’s decision to quit acting and take up rapping. Two Lovers features an awkward freestyle rap performance by Joaquin, and Gray believes the actor is imitating him. “I had an obsession with doing that sort of thing as a teenager. It turns out that Joaquin is imitating me in a lot of the movie. He said, ‘I want to do that, I want to steal from that, I want to do the rap that you used to do.’ I said, ‘OK.’ And now I’m seeing him do this thing, and I feel like I’ve ruined Joaquin Phoenix for the world. I don’t want to be the guy that destroyed Joaquin Phoenix’s acting career.” [DeadlineHollywoodDaily]

I wouldn’t beat yourself up.  Joaquin was a good actor, but for the time being at least, guy who pretends to be on drugs and sticks gum under Letterman’s desk is about 1000 times more entertaining than guy who talks about why his character fell in love with Gwyneth Paltrow.  And yet, not quite as entertaining as guy who gets hit in the nuts with food.  Something to ponder.