In the same vein as Paris je T’aime, I Love You, New York is a compilation of short films set in New York from a bunch of different directors including Brett Ratner, Allen Hughes and Randy Balsmyer — who I’d never heard of, but has a name that rivals “Chad Farthouse.”  Scarlett Johansson also directed a segment but it didn’t make the cut, which in light of the fact that a Brett Ratner segment did, has to feel like getting picked last for kickball when Steven Hawking’s on the playground.

I’m not too interested in this, perhaps because I live in New York and every time I hear someone say “Only in New York!” I want to peel off the skin of their face with a claw hammer, and I just can’t stomach the thought of a two-hour love letter to why it’s “the best place on Earth” or “the center of the universe.”  Kinda like when I lived in San Diego and couldn’t go two days without hearing someone brag about the weather, or hear how they called their cousin from Chicago to make him jealous because of the weather and how good the weather is and is so much better than the weather in Chicago, because Chicago doesn’t have as good a weather.  I get it, dude, it’s warm here.  Find a f*cking hobby.

[also available in HD at Apple]

^{Brett Ratner, Roman Polanski, and his 14-year-old daughter Morgane.  Move along, folks, nothing to see here…}

Bash Brett Ratner’s crappy movies all you want, you have to admit, the man’s kissed a lot of famous dudes.  Here are the ten creepiest pictures of him I could find.  And really, it wasn’t hard, the man’s like an awkwardness factory.

Director David O. Russell (Three Kings, I Heart Huckabees, Flirting with Disaster) has a reputation for being difficult to work with – besides the infamous video of him and Lily Tomlin screaming at each other on the set of I Heart Huckabees (included after the jump), he and George Clooney reported "came to blows" on the set of Three Kings (slap fight).

Now James Caan has stormed off the set of Russell’s latest film, a political comedy called Nailed.

The trouble started last Wednesday on the first of Caan’s two days of shooting the role of a U.S. speaker of the house who chokes to death on a cookie. Director David O. Russell asked him to cough as he choked, but Caan argued that the character couldn’t cough and choke to death at the same time.

Russell suggested that they shoot it both ways, but the veteran "Godfather" actor expressed distrust that his version would be considered and left the South Carolina set. [Via Yahoo/HR]

Everyone will pile on about Russell being hard to work with because of this, but whatever.  Actors are the most pampered, whiny babies on the planet.  If the director tells you to dance, or choke, or whatever; you dance, monkey.  Trust me, none of the crew talks about how intelligent and perceptive you are because you say stuff like, "Oh, but I don’t think my character would be putting on sunscreen like that, because he once got bit by a spider in the boarding house where his cousin was molested and…"

No. Shut up and do what you’re told, there’s a reason you’re not the writer.  The only actor with room to complain is Busey, who once lost three arms in a logging accident and only two of them grew back.  Dude is harsh.