I freely admit that I haven’t seen nearly enough Jackie Chan movies from when he was still in his stunt-performing/choreographing prime, so this scene from 2005′s The Myth was new to me. To make a long story short, I don’t know if the movie is any good, but this scene is fantastic, and should serve as proof, should anyone doubt that Jackie Chan is the Buster Keaton of martial arts movies. About a million miles away from the “badass” fight scenes you see in most action/martial arts movies these days, this one’s all about props, slapstick, and sustained spectacle, as Jackie Chan tries to fight off three pursuers while stuck on a sticky conveyor belt at the rat trap factory, as he and his busty damsel in distress (Mallika Sherawat) have their clothes gradually torn off while being slowly fed into a thresher. Talk about drama! Sexy drama! Rarely do you see a Looney Tunes cartoon so effectively brought to life.

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The Internet nearly exploded with nerdy joy when Hulu made the Criterion Collection available for free last weekend. And sure, if you like “critically acclaimed” movies by “esteemed directors,” those films are pretty good. But what about us folk who enjoy the simpler pleasures of a cinematic trainwreck? Maybe a movie featuring an evil lizard king or a crime-fighting Santa Claus? Fortunately, there are literally dozens of Hollywood’s anti-masterpieces available for free every single day on YouTube. Here are 16 awesomely bad movies streaming in unbroken clips that you can watch right now.

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Jackie Chan has a bit of a history of working with Chinese government-financed film companies, and as we know, the Chinese government has some strict rules about what it will allow in its movies (Chan also has a history of endorsing some shady products, but that’s another story). Point is, he has in the past seemed perhaps a little too willing to work with repressive government organizations. In a recent interview, he goes so far as to condone repression.

Noting that Hong Kong suffered long periods of oppression under the British colonial administration, Chan said the eventual longing for freedom “does not mean people can do whatever they want.”
“Hong Kong has become a city of protest marches — that’s what the world has been saying,” he said in an interview with the Guangzhou-based magazine Southern People Weekly. “In the past it was Korea, now it’s Hong Kong. [Demonstrators were] scolding China, scolding [the country's] leaders, scolding everything. We should have rules dictating what [issues people] can march for, and which they can’t.”
During the conversation, Chan also repeated the controversial remarks he made at a business leaders’ forum at Boao in April 2009, when he said he’s “not sure” if personal freedom is a good thing and that the Chinese people “need to be controlled”.
“Traffic regulations need to be followed — and can we not regulate against counterfeits? I have learnt to follow laws. Whoever does that [management], even if it’s the government, I will support it,” Chan added.

Hmm, that last bit leads me to wonder if perhaps he’s gotten ineffective law enforcement confused with freedom of speech and assembly. He talks about regulating counterfeits, and you’re like okay, sure, but then he wants only certain kinds of protests allowed, and you think, “Whoa, easy there, Hitler.” But like all Hitlers, he does have a few good ideas. OH GOD HOW DO I ERASE THIS? Anyway, he also said Rush Hour was the film he dislikes most.

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"Reedo boy go away! Stay out my store!"

The Jaden Smith/Jackie Chan Karate Kid remake was partially financed by the Chinese government (see: China Film Group Corps) and went on to gross $360 million worldwide, so why wouldn’t they want to make another one? The entire enterprise was the shameless sequel’s greatest success story. It was set in China and starred famous Kung Fu practitioner Jackie Chan, and they STILL called it KARATE Kid. Now Sony has wrangled poor Zak Penn (X-Men 2, Incredible Hulk), who’s probably a talented screenwriter, to do more of their dirty work. The Republicans bitch about China owning our economy every six minutes, and not one peep about this? Come on, guys, there’s low-hanging fruit here. Snatch the low-hanging fruit from this 12-year-old African-American boy– okay I probably could’ve worded this better.

Columbia Pictures has tapped “The Incredible Hulk” scribe Zak Penn to rewrite its untitled sequel to 2010′s surprise hit “The Karate Kid.”
Ethan Reiff and Cyrus Voris were hired to write a sequel just weeks after director Harald Zwart’s “Karate Kid” reboot took in $55.6 million domestically over its opening weekend. China-set pic went on to gross $359 million worldwide.
While plot details remain under wraps, original stars Jaden Smith and Jackie Chan are expected to reprise their roles, though no deals are currently in place. [Variety]

Phew, thank goodness, I don’t know what I’d do if Jaden Smith didn’t return. I just love it when famous people use their children as an extension of their personal fashion sense. Yo go, Will! You’ve imbued your progeny with such “swag!” Would that ALL of our children could one day wear sneakers with their own pictures on the side. Bullying would end, self-esteem would reign, and we’d all follow our dreams and groove in one groovy drum circle. I hope this trend continues, and three or four years from now we get to see Sly Stallone’s granddaughter, Dakota Lundgren, and Mickey Rourke’s dog in The Expendablets.

Jackie Chan is a happy-go-lucky movie star, so it’s no surprise that he gets a lot of endorsement deals, especially in his native China, where he’s their most-recognized celebrity.  But it seems he’s not particular enough about what he puts his name on, and lately, so many Chan-endorsed products have been failing that some people are saying that Chan is like a reverse King Midas, where instead of gold, everything he touches turns to TOILET POISON.

When news broke last month that an anti- hair-loss shampoo he promoted allegedly contained carcinogens, Chinese cyberspace and media were buzzing about the “Jackie Chan curse.”

Anti-hair-loss shampoo contained carcinogens, huh?  Gotta love China.  Here in America, celebrities like Jimmy Johnson are free to endorse transparent snake-oil products like pills to make your boners bigger with no repercussions, but hey, at least the pills aren’t made out of rat’s milk and factory runoff.

Consider the auto repair school that Chan plugged to aspiring Chinese mechanics: It became enmeshed in a diploma scandal [you mean your Chinese mechanic school diploma is FAKE? The dastard!]. Another of his sponsors, a maker of video compact discs, went bankrupt and saw its manager jailed for fraud. An educational computer that Chan pitched to children called the Subor Learning Machine flopped. And a cola he quaffed named Fenhuang fizzled. [ALLITERATION, the reporter later added.]
More recently, an air-conditioner brand that Chan promoted was hit by a report that one of its units exploded. Media wags couldn’t resist invoking the Jackie jinx.

“He has become the coolest spokesperson in history,” said an editorial in Oriental Guardian, a Nanjing newspaper. “A man who can destroy anything.”

Few know whether Chan actually uses the shampoo, called BaWang, which its manufacturer claims keeps hair roots strong and black.

CHAN: Dis hair root on regurah shampoo! (*cut to tired, mangy dog falling asleep in the mud*)  Now!  Dis a your hair root onna BaWang! (*cut to Jaden Smith karate kicking through board*)  BaWang! Strong and brack!

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