It’s been 22 years since Michael Crichton gave us the blueprint for cloning dinosaurs, and it’s a slap in science’s face that no one has actually tried it yet. All you need to do is find some mosquitos embedded in amber. DUH. That old guy even has some on his cane. Well thank God for fat Australian billionaires, because now Clive Palmer, the same guy building a

The controversial billionaire is rumoured to be planning to clone a dinosaur from DNA so he can set it free in a Jurassic Park-style area at his new Palmer Resort in Coolum.
Mr Palmer has, apparently, been in deep discussion with the people who successfully cloned Dolly the sheep to bring his dinosaur vision to life.
And while the concept sounds like a joke, it apparently comes from a source close to Mr Palmer’s inner circle. [SunshineCoastDaily]

Boy, there’s no more perfect emblem of man’s hubris in the first act than a fat Australian billionaire, is there? “Oi, whoy shouldn’t oy piss on God’s faace, mate?” Sadly, Palmer himself is denying the reports:

On speculation he had been in talks with a clone research institute on the prospects of bringing dinosaurs back to life, Mr Palmer told the Gold Coast Bulletin: “It’s just a beat-up of a story and untrue.”
Editor of The Sunshine Coast Daily, Mark Furler, said: “Mr Palmer has changed his tune several times on this project and the people of the Sunshine Coast wait with bated breath to see what the real plans are.

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I took this outside the Danzig & Doyle show last week in San Franciso. The kitty litter meme has spread to real life.

In case you’re new around here, no, Danzig news isn’t, strictly speaking, movie news, but we’ve long considered it part of our mandate. Our favorite

Security had to physically hold Glenn Danzig back from attacking photographers at Bonnaroo on Saturday. The muscle-bound metal legend’s inner Axl Rose got the best of him eight songs into an early-evening Danzig Legacy set at the Manchester, Tennessee music festival. The Danzig singer, who is, to say the least, a little finicky about having his picture taken, ran offstage and over to an adjacent media area, where he tried to confront photographers before storming off to his backstage trailer in a huff. After a few minutes, Danzig returned to the stage to finish the show.

Photographer Michael W. Bunch, who was shooting the event for the Nashville Scene and was one of four photographers approved to shoot the band from the That Tent photo pit, tells Rolling Stone that photographers were warned that their presence might cause problems with Danzig and his security detail.

“I was told by someone that works for Bonnaroo that, essentially, we could shoot over on the side at our own risk,” Bunch says. “They warned us [that] he’s not a huge fan of being photographed and that his staff might approach us.” It wasn’t long before they did.

“You know you can’t shoot Danzig, right?” Bunch says a Danzig crew member told him during the show. “I saw some people dancing, I was shooting them and then the guy came back over again and he was like, ‘Man, [Glenn] is getting really antsy. You really aren’t shooting him, are you?’” Bunch recalls.

“He was just pointing at me and screaming something about f*cking up the show,” Bunch recalls, “I was confused and amused by it, I guess, because I thought it was absolutely ridiculous … I just stood there thinking, ‘Well, if Danzig really wants to run offstage and tackle me then I’m gonna give him his chance.’ … I feel like it was really a theatrical thing.” [RollingStone]

Danzig? Theatrical? Nooo. I can’t imagine a 50-year-old man with dyed black, mid-back-length hair performing in front of two giant devil’s head standees, singing about demon rape doing anything theatrical. Anyway, having seen Danzig perform recently myself, I can personally attest to seeing him try to kick a guy in the head from the stage, I assume because the guy was taking pictures. But you know what? Seeing Danzig get pissed off and defend his own vanity with physical violence was half the reason I went to the show in the first place. Well, that and the goth sluts.

More Danzig fun after the jump.

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We first met Seattle’s “real-life superhero” Phoenix Jones last October when he tried towho’s also known as amateur MMA fighter Ben Fodor, had a story that paralleled HBO’s documentary, Superheroes, about similar, self-appointed superheroes. Well now, in a move that’s either genius, obvious, inevitable, or most likely a combination of all three, a self-appointed supervillain, Rex Velvet, has emerged to challenge Phoenix Jones, whom he calls “a hobo snitch in a mask.”

“Let us rid our city of these silly, vigilante nerds.” -Rex Velvet

He has released the following video:

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Looks like someone's got a case of the Mondays.

Dirk the Fairy Penguin is recuperating at his home at Sea World on Australia’s Gold Coast today after being kidnapped by drunks in a Hangover-style prank and nearly fed to sharks. The most surprising part of the story? The drunks weren’t even Australian.

Three young Britons will appear in court in Australia accused of stealing a penguin during a drunken night out. The trio are said to have broken into a Sea World marine park, where they also allegedly stripped to their underwear to swim with dolphins. They apparently remembered their high jinks only when they woke the following morning with hangovers to find the small fairy penguin, called Dirk, on the carpet of their rented apartment. Yesterday one of the men – aged 18, 20 and 21 and from Wales – appeared on Australian television, where he admitted it had all been a bad mistake.

Rhus Jones said that as reality struck, the trio panicked and released the penguin – which had been bred in captivity – into a canal. The bird was rescued when two passers-by spotted it and became concerned. The couple said they saw Dirk being chased out of the water, possibly by one of the sharks known to swim in the Gold Coast waterways, before it was herded back into the canal by a dog. Meanwhile, police moved in on the three Welshmen after a friend reported that they had boasted on Facebook about the ‘bird’ they took home with them that night.

I bet they did. Waking up with a “bird” in your apartment? Talk about a softball of a joke for drunk British dudes. I wish I could’ve been the Australian news anchor who broke the story. “And neow, a story fer ivery bloke who’s evah woken up after a noight on the piss with a bird he doesn’t remembah, smellin’ lahke fish and takin’ a shit on the cahpet, wishin’ he could feed her ta shahks. Owah mate Rog has the story in Bindoolahwoombahbah. Rog?”

[via TheDailyMail]