After the jump, I’ve got the trailer for the indie sci-fi flick Space Geography. But before I get to that, a little explanation of how I came upon it. In running this site, I get sent a lot of trailers for indie movies. I wish I could post all of them, but the truth is, on any given day I have about four times the amount of content that I can feasibly write about, and if I highlighted every indie film someone sent me, the site would quickly turn into a site just about indie films that people hadn’t heard of, and then people would probably stop coming to my site, and then our advertisers would drop out, and I wouldn’t make any money, and pretty soon I’d have to go get a real job, and trust me on this, you don’t want me trying to hold a regular job. I’ve done it before, and it’s just bad for society. I feel bad about not posting a lot of these, but I can’t respond to them all. Every once in a while, a person who’s sent me two or three emails without a response gets very angry about it, and I can’t say that I blame them. In fact, I kind of respect their honesty. The following is one such email.

I SENT A BUNCH OF EMAIL TO YOU ABOUT MY FILM “SPACE GEOGRAPHY” BUT YOU IGNORE ALL THEM! WHY? HOWW DO I GET YOU TO REPORT ON MY FILM?? I AM THE “LITTLE GUY” IN THE FILM WORLD. I AM STRUGGLING TO GET MY F*CKIN MOVIE FINISHED WHILE BIG-MONEY CORPORATE STUDIOS MAKE THEIR WONDER STORIES AND ALL THE MOVIES LIKE STAR TREK ETC.

I HAVE SMALL BUDGET FOR FILM. I HAVE SMALL BUDGET FOR MY SPECIAL EFFECTS. I WILL FINISH THIS AND YES! I WILL TAKE IT AS FAR TO THE TOP AS I CAN. WHAT DO I HAVE TO LOSE?? NOTHING!!

PLEASE ANSWER MY F*CKING MAIL. I NEED MORE PEOPLE TO SEE MY TRAILER! YOU HELP ME!

I LIVE IN MINNEAPOLIS AND THE FILM COMMUNITY SUCKS HERE. NO HELP FROM ANY OF THE AMATURE PIECES OF SH*T, AND THEY MAKE TERRIBLE MOVIES.

MY MOVIE IS A SCI-FI EPIC WITH ROMANCE, THRILLS, AVCTION, AND HORROR. I HAVE MANY TALENTED PEOPLE WORKING AND SWEATING OVER THIS, TALENTED ANIMATORS, CAMERA, EDIT, ALL THE

YOU HAVE TO WATCH MY TRAILER, POST STORY ABOUT IT, AND HELP ME OUT. I WAS KICKED OUT OF FACEBOOK, TURNED DOWN BY IMDB -I DON’T NEED THEIR CRAP! ALL GARBAGE TO ME. I AM DOING THIS ON MY OWN AND I WANT TO BE ON YOUR WEBSITE.

PUT MY TRAILER ON YOUR WEBSITE AND I WILL GIVE YOU CREDIT IN MY MOVIE

SOUND FAIR??

Long story short, I like the cut of this guy’s jib, so I’m posting the trailer below. I would like my credit to be GUY WHO RUN F*CKING WWEBSITE!!!

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That's not a green screen

You may not remember through the haze of booze, pills, and indiscriminate hobo sex, but back in 2008, I posted a clip of a zombie fighting a shark. This was not done through special effects, unless you consider sticking an actor inside a shark tank a special effect. The clip came from Lucio Fulci’s 1980 film Zombie — why wouldn’t you call it “Zombie Shark Fight?” Sell the sizzle, man! — and thanks to a recent re-release, you’ll be able to see it in theaters this weekend at special midnight showings in advance of its DVD and Blu-Ray release next week (October 25th, to be precise). I’ve got the list of theaters and more pictures and video after the jump.

“Fulci put a stuntman dressed as a zombie in a tank with a live shark and made them fight – it’s one of the craziest, most insane and irresponsible scenes ever put on film. This was 1980, years before CG. And the zombie wins! To this day, nobody knows how in the hell he did it, it’s simply jaw-dropping. There’s nothing you will see in any modern zombie movie that comes close to what Fulci did in 1980.” – Eli Roth. [from the press release]

Based on my extensive knowledge of racial stereotypes from the 30s, I think I can imagine it went down. (EXCLUSIVE!):

STUNTMAN: But-a mister-a Fulci, how-a Guiseppe guana fight-a di shark? My mama, she barely-a teach-a me to swim! Please, Guiseppe got-a keeds to-a feed!

LUCIO FULCI: Guiseppe! Testaduro! How many-a time Lucio guana tell-a you? You dona a-gotta FIGHT-a di shark, you-a just-a gotta SWEEM with-a di shark. The shark, she wont-a even-a be-a hungry. We fill-em uppa good, with-a my mama’s a-meataballs!

STUNTMAN: …With-a… you mama‘s a-meataballs? Mamma mia! Everyone-a know, Mama Fulci’s a-meatballs, they’re-a di best eena Italy!

LUCIO FULCI: Oh, so-a now a-you no-a scared-a no more, skifozo? You just-a make sure-a the shark-a belly, she no burst-a from a-too many meataball. Now go, get inna di tank. You film-em uppa good, I give-a you some-a di leftover a-shark a-ball.  ACCIONE!

STUNTMAN: Mama Fulci’s a-meataball, here I a-come! (*kisses fingers, jumps in tank*)

After the jump: the trailer, more stills, and a list of theaters where you can see Zombie this weekend.

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Drake Doremus’ film Like Crazy won the Sundance Grand Jury Prize in January and opens in limited release this October. It stars Anton Yelchin (CURLY-HAIRED MEN ARE TAKING OVER!) and Felicity Jones as two college kids who fall in love and then struggle to maintain a relationship. They say it’s a love story, but to me it looks more like a mystery. The main mystery being “WHAT THE F*CK ARE THEY SAYING?” Seriously, I watched that twice and understood maybe 65% of the dialog.

The Grand Jury prize went to Like Crazy, starring Anton Yelchin and Felicity Jones as a young couple who fall in love in college and struggle afterward to maintain a long-distance relationship. Directed and co-written by Drake Doremus (Douchebag), the film was largely improvised.
“We had a 50-page outline and rehearsed for two weeks and let things happen organically,” Doremus said. “The key was to do 30-minute takes for the five weeks we shot.”
The story is not clear-cut — intentionally.
“I wanted it to feel gray,” Doremus told a Sundance audience. “I wanted you guys to decide for yourselves.” [USAToday]

Oh boy, I can’t wait to watch a meandering narrative where I get to be the guinea pig who decides whether it’s actually about anything. Like Crazy? More like Like Lazy.

HD available at Apple.

FilmDrunk’s 2010 Lifetime Achievement Award winner Christopher Mintz-Plasse and some guy named Scott Porter are the latest actors to hop on board the upcoming indie comedy The Hand Job, which is starting to look like a “Who’s Who” of people you would expect to see attached to an indie comedy. Variety reports that in addition to Vince’s best friend Chris and that Scott dude who probably doesn’t even read FilmDrunk, the Maggie Carey-directed film also stars:

Aubrey Plaza
Alia Shawkat
Mae Whitman
Connie Britton
Dominic Dierkes
D.C. Pierson
Donald Glover
Andy Samberg
Bill Hader

Plaza stars as a nerdy (read: hipster; see also: Juno) high school student who vows to lose her virginity before she heads off to college. And as I wrote that sentence, a million pairs of skinny jeans just got a little bit tighter. Glover will play a lifeguard, which is ironic and therefore a part of the standard indie formula, and Hader will play a stoner. I wish he would play Stefon. Sad Burnsy in a skinny tie.

Variety also reports that the roles of a “gorgeous older sister” and Plaza’s “intimidating father, a conservative judge” have yet to be filled. And I will save them some time and go ahead and scribble Zooey Deschanel’s name in the sister role, and for the dad… Alec Baldwin. Maybe Tim Robbins. Either way, it will be someone who is a famous liberal mocking the conservative role. That will totally show the system. Or not. Whatever.

From co-directors Anna Bowden and Ryan Fleck (Half Nelson) comes It’s Kind of a Funny Story, based on the book by Ned Vizzini. Vizzini?  INCONCEIVABLE!

It’s Kind of a Funny Story finds a suicidal teen (played by The United States of Tara star Keir Gilchrist) checking himself into the psych ward for a minimum stay of five days. There he encounters various “wacky” types (hey, Daniel Faraday Jeremy Davies!) and, naturally, a young ingenue (boy hating Emma Roberts) ready to bring him into adulthood. But it’s Galifianakis as the de facto guide that makes the biggest impact on him and the trailer. [Movieline]

I wasn’t a fan of Half Nelson (it looked pretty, Baby Goose’s acting was great, and it had its moments, it just seemed like kind of a nothing story), and probably my least favorite premise is the protagonist-gets-sent-to-a-mental-hospital story.  Seems like every book with a male narrator from the 50s or 60s was required to have at least one mental hospital scene.  Don’t you see, man??  Society’s values were so outta whack they had to lock up everyone who didn’t think like them, maaaan!  Watch me play this bongo, man, it deflects conformists. That said, it has Zach Galifianakis, and Zach Galifianakis could stop bullets, change Coke to Pepsi, and find my f*ckin’ car keys, so you better believe I’ll be seeing the hell out of this movie.  I’d watch Zach Galifianakis take a dump. Hence why I bought these binoculars.

(*falls out of tree*)