Not too long ago, I brought you the trailer for the Indian film Endhiran, the most expensive Indian movie ever made, a movie which featured a giant snake made of robot men slithering around and eating cars, a film so good people bathed the poster in milk and showered screens with flowers, a film Danger Guerrero described as “like if Michael Bay had a baby with Michael Bay.”

Today I bring you the trailer for another Indian film, RA.One, which stands for “Random Access Version 1.0.”  This one doesn’t have any giant cobras made of robot men (we may have to wait for version 2.0 for that), but it does have one robot man (or computer man, anyway) throwing cars and breaking the sidewalk like a boss (which is all the rage these days).  And because he’s Indian, he’s not immune to the touch of a woman or the lure of song.  If things go well, who knows, maybe we’ll see an appearance by the dancing condoms, if you know what I mean.  Also, I like the idea of a computerized action hero set in India.  If he breaks down, tech support is right there. It would be like an iPad rampaging through the genius bar.

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This being a movie site, we could sit here all day speculating on what projects James Cameron and Arnold Schwarzenegger might be discussing on their trip to the Amazon this week.  But the truth is, no one knows, and I’d rather just savor this incredible picture on its own merits.

ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER THOUGHT BUBBLE
Wait, *this* is Brazil?  Where’s all the mulatto ass?  …This truly is a land of contradictions.

JAMES CAMERON THOUGHT BUBBLE:
I wonder if this noble savage knows I burn piles of money to keep my gold bars warm.  Ooh! Maybe it has a retarded sibling or something that I could hunt for sport!  Wait, relax, Cameron, don’t wanna seem to eager.  Try to look interested in this cultural crap first.

"And here's an endangered sea snake I once used to strangle a high-priced prostitute."

[via Arnie's Twitter]

India’s most expensive film ever made, Endhiran, aka Robot, has a new trailer out, and even though it’s not as long as the last one I posted, you better believe I’m posting every scrap of video I can from this insanely badass-looking movie.  This looks like Michael Bay’s wildest wet dream, but with more dancing, and probably less ebonics.

What if Bollywood created a movie with equal parts Iron Man, I, Robot, Bicentennial Man and featured the score of Academy Award-winning composer A.R. Rahman (Slumdog Millionaire)? S. Shankar’s The Robot looks to be that movie. The film features Rajnikanth in dual roles, as a science professor and a superintelligent android robot.’ [/Film]

I still prefer my previous synopsis, “a giant cobra made of robot men slithers around eating cars.”  But you know what they say. Would a giant cobra made of robot men by any other name not still make you want to sing and dance?  …Something like that.

So the Robot gets eyebrows, but no mustache? Your rare displays of restraint sadden me.

This fall… EXTREME! GETS! OUTSOURCED!  (*double curry to chesty*)

I never saw I Robot, but having seen this trailer for the Indian film, Endhiran, aka The Robot, which looks a lot like I Robot, I must conclude that American filmmakers could learn a lot from Indian filmmakers.  I never would have been able to not see I Robot if it had had what this film has, namely singing, dancing, sex appeal, and yes, a giant cobra made of robot men that slithers around eating cars.  You could put pretty much anything in a movie about a giant cobra made of robot men that slithers around eating cars and I’d still want to see it, even Cam Gigandet.

The stunts were choreographed by the famous Yuen Woo Ping (The Matrix, Kill Bill), with animatronics from Stan Winston Studios, and music by AR Rahman (Slumdog Millionaire).  It’s reportedly the most expensive Indian film ever made at $32 million, which I assume translates to roughly $86 billion in first-world dollars*, and opens overseas later this month.  HOLY CRAP, did you see the guy walk in with robot tigers on lightning leashes?  Now that’s an entrance.  Michael Bay wept. (And then dried his tears with a planned 10-kiloton explosion).

*not exact figures

[via Blastr]

This clip is kinda like the Indian teen wolf, only instead of a werewolf and a fat guy, it’s just one hairy fat guy.  The fat guy is apparently Chiranjeevi, the most famous Tollywood actor of all-time, Tollywood being the Telugu-language branch of the Indian film industry …long story.  Anyway, I’m not sure what’s better: the glowing, badly CGI’d basketball, or that the filmmakers don’t really know the rules of basketball.  Or that after Chiranjeevi wins the game with a full-court shot, he celebrates by outrunning a train.  It’s not what you would call… subtle.  Get it?  The fat Indian guy is an amazing athlete?  It’s kind of like when they give Kevin James a hot wife.  The film went on to be so successful that it eventually spawned an American version, Air Bud.

[via FreeDarko]