Clear the way, folks, I’ve got important news to report, and that news is that TOMMY AND THE COOL MULE is now available to watch instantly.

(*talking into stapler*) JANET! CLEAR MY SCHEDULE! (*shoves cats off conference table*)

I first brought you news of this project back in 2009, and let me tell you, This. Project. Has. Everything.  First off, I don’t want to bury the lede here:  ICE-T STARS AS THE VOICE OF A TALKING MULE.  If you’re still reading this and haven’t already clicked through to see the trailer, I’m not sure we can be friends.

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In TOMMY AND THE COOL MULE, Tommy’s DAD goes off to IRAQ, leaving TOMMY and his MOM to defend the FAMILY FARM from a GREEDY DEVELOPER played by KEVIN SORBO.  But if he WANTS to be the MAN OF THE HOUSE, Tommy is going to have to WIN the BIG RACE…. (*RECORD SCRATCH*) on a mule!  A cool mule, to be exact.  Voiced by Ice-T.

I. Cannot. Believe. This. Is. A. Real. Movie. Seriously, this has to be from the same people who made Nachos the Cross-Eyed Cat, right?  I would love to have been a fly on the wall when they were making the Cool Mule’s costume.

“Hmm, the bling necklace doesn’t fit over the mule’s head. I’m gonna have to go get a longer chain.”
“What?  We’re burning daylight here!  Screw it, just put the necklace over his face.  There.  I think it looks… cooler like that way, doesn’t it?”
“Whatever.”

[Source - thanks to Jake for the tip]