THERE CAN BE ONLY THREE!

Back in 2008, Summit Entertainment picked up the rights to The Highlander with Iron Man writers Art Marcum and Matt Holloway on board to reboot the franchise. They later dropped out and Summit announced last year that the original film’s producer, Neal Moritz, signed on with director Justin Lin, who is best known for directing three of the Fast and Furious films, but he gets a pass because he directed the “Modern Warfare” episode of Community, too.

Now Summit is moving forward with the new version, with longtime Highlander producer Peter Davis also jumping in. And the team has its collective eyes set on a writer now, too – Melissa Rosenberg, who wrote all five Twilight films. Nerd boner now flaccid.

So what about this project is going to sparkle, Variety?

Summit plans to expand on the original “Highlander” premise of immortals hunting each other through the ages. The new pic will center on the immortal Scottish swordsman Connor MacLeod, who must confront a murderous barbarian — the last of his kind — who lusts for a fabled prize.

Of course Twilight author Stephanie Meyer is responsible for most of the Twilight aspects that we poke fun of, like sparkling vampires and middle-aged women lusting over teenage boys. But I’m curious to see if Rosenberg can capture the true evil and maliciousness of a character like the Kurgan, having written lines like these for a movie about vampires:

“I hate you for making me want you so much.”
“I can’t ever lose control with you.”
“You’re like my own personal brand of heroin.”

I can see it now…

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Summit Entertainment, the studio behind Twilight, has announced that they’ll be rebooting 1986′s Highlander, with 4 Fast 4 Furious director Justin Lin at the helm.  Art Marcum and Matt Holloway (who worked with Fergby on Iron Man and also wrote Punisher: War Zone) will write the script.

Summit’s film will expand on the original HIGHLANDER’s core mythology of immortals battling amongst us, hunting each other through the ages by tapping its newly minted creative team to take its re-imagination to new heights. Plans call for the re-imagination to spur a new franchise for the studio. [Summit Press Release via /Film]

Wait, wait, the original story was about immortals who hunted each other using newly minted creative teams?  DAMN YOUR LACK OF PUNCTUATION!  Anyway, this seemed like a way worse idea before I started listening to the Queen songs from the original.  I know this new one’s probably going to be Papa Roach singing about their parents’ divorce while Channing Tatum pours Highlander energy drink on his shirtless chest, but all I can think is I AM IMMORTAL / I HAVE INSIDE ME BLOOD OF KINGS…. (*10 minute mouth guitar solo*)

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